


Halcyon Days

by rurambles



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Childhood Friends, Childhood Friends, Codependency, Coming of Age, Holding Hands, M/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-17 07:21:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 46,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28596138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rurambles/pseuds/rurambles
Summary: When Kei was five, Hinata Shoyou moved in next door.When they were five they held hands for the first time. They haven't let go since.Childhood friend AU
Relationships: Hinata Natsu & Tsukishima Kei, Hinata Shouyou & Tsukishima Kei, Hinata Shouyou & Tsukishima Kei & Yamaguchi Tadashi, Hinata Shouyou/Tsukishima Kei, Tsukishima Akiteru & Tsukishima Kei
Comments: 62
Kudos: 327





	1. Chapter 1

＼(＾∀＾)メ(＾∀＾)ノ

* * *

When Kei was five, Hinata Shoyou moved in next door. He was oddly enamored by the small boy. Maybe it was because he didn’t have any playmates his own age, or maybe it was because Shoyou was unabashedly loud where he was quiet, but Kei found himself begging his mother to let him go next door and play.

His mother was more than happy to contact Shoyou’s mother and see if he was free, then send him scampering to the neighbors backyard to play on their new swing and slide set. Eventually Kei would leave the house on his own to knock on Shoyou’s door to see if he could play, and even if it wasn’t a good time the two of them would sneak into the backyard and continue their adventures.

From sun-up to sundown they could run around their backyards, stopping only for food and the occasional nap. When the weather was bad they would wander between their houses, going back and forth trying to decide whose toys they wanted to play with.

After a few months or playing together their mothers sat them down with big smiles on their faces, “Guess what!” Shoyou’s mother, Yukimi, said excitedly.

Shoyou’s face lit up with her excited tone, “What? What?”

“You two are going to start school soon!” she cheered.

“Yay!” Shoyou cheered along with her. He didn’t fully understand what that meant but he fed off his mother's infectious happiness.

Kei’s mother smiled as well, “You too, Kei.”

He wasn’t as happy but he wasn’t as easy to please as Shoyou, “I don’t wanna,” he pouted.

But his mother had a secret weapon, “Akiteru goes to school,” she told him lightly. He brightened up at her words and she knew it was working, “He can even walk you two to school sometimes.”

Kei nodded eagerly, “Okay, we can go to school.”

“Yay!” Shoyou cheered again.

* * *

On their first day of school Kei and Shoyou walked hand-in-hand, four wide, with their mothers. Kei whined that Akiteru didn’t come with them for their first day but Aki promised to pick them up at the end of the day so he allowed his brother’s absence without too much of a fuss, but he made it clear that he would much rather stay home.

Shoyou, on the other hand, was ecstatic to be going to school. He tried to run ahead a few paces every few minutes but he was always held back by his mother’s firm grip and his own unwillingness to let go of Kei’s hand. Instead he spent the entire walk babbling about what he thought school would be like. He was excited about new people and new toys and new projects and everything school had to offer.

When they arrived at the classroom Shoyou finally let go of Kei’s hand so he could run inside and take it all in. The room was brightly colored and everything was appropriately sized for his five-year-old self.

Kei cried. He wanted to go back home where everything was familiar. He wanted to go down the slide in Shoyou’s backyard and use the crayons that were hidden under his bed. He didn’t want to meet all of these new people.

His mother and the teacher tried to placate him but he cried harder.

Eventually Shoyou came running back to him and took his hand to drag him deeper into the classroom away from the adults. He pointed out everything he noticed about the room and slowly, Kei calmed down. His mother slipped out unnoticed.

During the day whenever one of them got upset they found the other and everything was okay again.

True to his word, Akiteru picked them up at the end of the day, and Kei thought that maybe school wouldn’t be that terrible after all.

* * *

When he was six Kei found out that his teacher was getting married. He thought about it hard over the walk home and came to a conclusion.

“Mom,” he said seriously over dinner that night, “when I get big I’m gonna marry Shoyou.”

His mother laughed good naturedly, “Is it because he’s your best friend?” He nodded eagerly at her and she laughed again, “I’m sorry, Kei. You can’t marry Shoyou because he’s not a girl. But I promise that you can be the very best friends forever.”

Kei frowned at her. He didn’t really understand why he couldn’t marry Shoyou. What did it matter that he was a boy and not a girl? Girls were gross, not that he was very close to any of the girls in his class. But he didn’t want to fight with his mother so he agreed that Shoyou could be his very best friend instead.

Akiteru smiled at him at well, he was eleven and knew a lot more about the world than Kei did, “Who knows, maybe Shoyou will have a sister just like him.”

* * *

Akiteru didn’t know how right he was, because a few months later when Kei and Shoyou were still six, Natsu was born.

She was impossibly tiny with a tuft of orange hair atop her head that matched her brother and puffy red cheeks. Kei wouldn’t call her cute or anything like that, but she was fascinating. She spent hours not doing anything and then screamed so loudly he could hear her next door. Shoyou was enamored with her, he wanted to hold her all the time but his mother wouldn’t let him.

Kei’s mother sent over food every few days to help out, she said she remembered what it was like in those first few months and she could have used any amount of help-- Shoyou and Natsu had the same age gap as Akiteru and Kei, so he figured that she knew what she was talking about. (And when she thought he wasn’t listening Kei overheard their mothers talking about how it was unfortunate that Shoyou and Natsu’s father didn’t stick around, so Kei assumed that’s why she was really helping.)

Besides the noise and the new rules about keeping quiet and the weird baby smells, the worst part for Kei was how much Shoyou loved his new baby sister. It felt like any free time they had after school he spent with her instead of playing with him, and he hated it. Shoyou was his friend first.

He tried to share how he felt with Aki but his brother just laughed at him. Akiteru may not have been the smartest person to go to with this problem, Kei thought after, considering how much Kei looked up to him and could see himself temporarily forgetting about his friend because of how cool his brother was.

Akiteru suggested that he spend time with Shoyou and Natsu together and he begrudgingly agreed.

At first he didn’t understand what the fuss was about. She was a baby and didn’t do anything even if Shoyou tried to interact with her, but as the months went on she always seemed happy to see him and he became just as enamored.

Natsu wasn’t really his sister but he decided that having a little sibling was a lot of fun.

* * *

Shoyou was tired.

With a new baby in the house waking up every few hours demanding something or other, he wasn’t getting all the sleep he was used to. And after a few months of being woken up in the middle of the night over and over again, it was starting to get to him.

Kei could first tell something was wrong when he had to practically drag Shoyou to school. They met up outside their houses, linked hands, and instead of starting their walk, Shoyou slumped heavily onto Kei’s arm and closed his eyes.

“‘m tired,” he whined.

Kei rolled his eyes at his best friend’s theatrics, “Nap at school.”

“Carry me?”

“No,” Kei tugged on his hand causing Shoyou to stumble forward a few steps and they continued to school in the same fashion. Every time Shoyou lagged behind, yawning and rubbing his eyes from lack of sleep, Kei pulled on his hand again so he would catch up.

Usually once they arrived at their classroom Shoyou ran in ahead and greeted everyone, but this time he stayed by Kei’s side and let himself be led.

He let out a big sigh, a sound way too put upon for his young age, and said “You need to find somewhere quieter to sleep.” Shoyou nodded into Kei’s arm but didn’t respond.

That night, as Kei was just about to drift off to sleep, he heard a knock at his door. He looked towards his door and held his breath but didn’t hear anything else so let himself drift again. But there was another knock.

“Aki?” he asked groggily.

The door creaked open slowly and Shoyou peeked his head in, his bright orange hair shining in the moonlight. “Can I sleep here?” he whispered, looking around like he was afraid of getting caught and kicked out.

Kei rubbed his eyes to make sure he wasn’t dreaming but when he saw Shoyou still standing there he rolled over in bed to make room and lifted the blanket to invite his friend in. Shoyou broke into a grin and dove into the bed, immediately making himself comfortable on Kei’s pillow.

“You took a bath, right?” Kei mumbled into the invading orange mop.

Shoyou stopped wiggling, “Yeah, why?”

He yawned, “Don’t want your germs all over my bed.”

He scowled and opened his mouth to reply but Kei was asleep before he could come up with something.

* * *

In the morning Yukimi went into Shoyou’s room to wake him up for school to find his bed empty. In her shock she almost dropped Natsu but she regained her composure at the last second. She searched the house from top to bottom, calling his name all the while, but there was no trace of her son.

The more she looked the more she could feel her panic rising. There would be no reason for him to run away, and she was pretty sure that his father wouldn’t just take him like that.

She left the house in her pajamas, still clinging to Natsu, and searched the yard. There were traces of him all across the yard because he was never one to put away his toys, but nothing hinted at where he could have gone. Except some of Kei’s toys were intermingled with her son’s and she rushed to the Tsukishima house to see if they had seen her son.

She frantically knocked on the door until Tsukishima Kurena answered and she begged to ask Kei if he had seen Shoyou.

When she was led deeper into the house she didn’t expect to see the two boys curled up peacefully asleep in Kei’s bed.

“Shoyou!” she said, a touch too loudly but relieved to find her son uninjured, “there you are!”

At the sound of his name Shoyou jolted awake and fell out of the bed. Kei sat up slowly and rubbed his eyes to see his mother and Shoyou’s mother standing in the doorway, “Why are you all in my room?”

Shoyou’s mother frowned at him, “What’s he doing in your room?” she pointed to Shoyou who was still splayed out awkwardly on the floor and making no attempt to get up.

“I was sleeping,” he said helpfully, “Natsu was keeping me awake so I came here!”

“You can’t leave the house without telling me!”

Shoyou yawned and stretched, “But you were already asleep.”

She let out a frustrated noise like she knew that she wasn’t going to get anywhere with her hard headed son, “You can’t do it again.”

He does it again.

* * *

Practically the moment Kei left his house he took Shoyou’s hand. It was their first day of elementary school and Kei was not a fan of change. The only thing that made going to elementary school bearable, besides clinging to Shoyou’s hand, was the fact that this was the only year he and Akiteru would be in school together, so he also got to walk with his big brother.

On the walk to school Aki told them about all the cool things they could do at school and all the friends they were going to make. Shoyou ate it all up, jumping up and down and trying to run ahead, but Kei wanted to go back to their small pre-school where he already knew everyone.

Shoyou grinned at him and asked, “Are you excited?” and didn’t even notice when Kei didn’t respond.

Akiteru dropped them off at their classroom, they were lucky enough to be in the same class, before he left for the opposite side of the building. Kei watched him go and felt the dread build up in his stomach. It doubled when Shoyou let go of his hand and entered the classroom without him.

Even at seven years old Kei knew that he and Shoyou were a bit different. Shoyou had no qualms about talking to everybody and anybody about literally anything, while Kei preferred to hang back and do his own thing or do things one-on-one. So he felt left behind when his friend immediately started talking to all of the other children in the classroom. They seemed egged on by his infectious exuberance and the volume of the room rose, but Kei stood to the side and watched.

Eventually a teacher quieted them down and had them all sit, and Kei found that he was excited that he was going to learn a lot more here than he did at their old pre-school, and he hoped that it would make up for Shoyou leaving him behind.

His worries were unfounded though, because no matter how many laps of the room Shoyou did, or how many people he spoke to and charmed, he always returned to Kei’s side. He tried to introduce Kei to people (always as “my best friend Kei” which made him feel better) but he was already a bit overwhelmed by starting a new school, he didn’t want to meet so many new people, so Shoyou backed off.

After the last bell Shoyou appeared by his side again and slipped his hand into Kei’s so they could walk home together. They not-so-patiently waited for Akiteru to finish talking to all of his friends because they were instructed by their mothers to all walk together, but soon Aki joined them too.

About half way home Aki said, “Y’know, you two don’t have to hold hands anymore.”

Shoyou looked up at him like he didn’t understand what he was saying, “Why wouldn’t we?”

“You might get picked on by the older kids at school. You two aren’t babies who need to hold hands to walk in the street.”

Kei involuntarily tightened his grip on Shoyou’s hand but it was unnecessary because Shoyou made no motion to let go. Instead he formed a fist with his free hand and raised it like he was ready to fight off invisible enemies, “I’ll take on any bullies!” he yelled.

That night, Shoyou snuck out of his bed and into Kei’s house, silently made the familiar journey down dark hallways; and when he finally made it to Kei’s bedroom, he found his friend sitting up in bed waiting for him.

“Are we too old for this?” Kei asked immediately.

Shoyou frowned and joined him in the bed. He had started sneaking into the Tsukishima house to sleep because Natsu was a baby and her crying was keeping him awake, but now she was just about two years old and mostly slept through the night. After about a month of sneaking out Kei’s mother showed Shoyou where she hid an extra key and both of their mothers just seemed to accept that it was going to happen, so they weren’t getting in trouble for it.

“Do you want me to stop?”

He flopped down on his back, “Not really.”

Shoyou laid down next to him, “Then I won’t,” he said with a finality that even Kei didn’t have the heart to argue with.

* * *

When they were seven, another amazing thing happened. Akiteru introduced them to volleyball.

Akiteru was on the school’s team and he was good. He was very good. Sometimes they got to watch him practice and they sat in awe as he consistently served the ball over the net or hit a particularly good spike.

It was Shoyou who demanded that Aki teach them how to play. At first Akiteru just gave them a volleyball while he was at practice and had them pass the ball back and forth, they were terrible at it and spent more time chasing after the ball than passing. But Shoyou wasn’t satisfied with that, so at home Aki actually spent time showing them how to position their arms and plant their feet.

They spent hours passing the ball back and forth, until their arms were red and the sun went down and their mothers were calling them in for dinner.

But Shoyou wanted to hit the ball like he saw the other kids do. They all looked like they were having so much fun and he wanted to join in. Kei offered to try and set the ball like they saw the other kids do so Shoyou could hit it, even if they didn’t have a net, and Shoyou eagerly took him up on his offer.

Kei threw the ball up in the air and tried to copy how he saw the others set it and Shoyou ran up and tried to hit it. He missed. They tried again and again but the outcome was always the same.

Eventually Kei let out a frustrated growl and said, “Aren’t you too short to play volleyball anyway?” It was mean of him to say and he knew it the second the words left his mouth. Shoyou was one of the shortest people in their class.

Shoyou looked confused, “I haven’t started growing yet. Just you wait, I’m going to be so much taller than you when we grow up!”

“Whatever, lets try again.”

* * *

Over a year later Shoyou wasn’t that much taller but Kei had grown. He had grown a lot. They were in their second year of elementary school, their first year without Akiteru there, and Shoyou still felt like a baby.

Eventually during their walk to school he held up their joint hands, “Don’t you feel like you’re walking your baby brother to school?”

“Sorry, I couldn’t hear you from all the way down there,” Kei taunted. Shoyou tried to kick him but Kei dodged him.

“When it rains you get wetter than I do,” he stuck his tongue out.

Kei snorted, “What does that even mean?”

Shoyou stuck out his tongue, “Rain hits you first so it hits you most.”

“That doesn’t make any sense.”

They fell into a comfortable silence for the rest of the walk, Shoyou lightly swung their hands back and forth between them. By now most of the other students had gotten used to seeing them like that, they got a few weird looks but no one really gave them trouble. Kei was quick to glare at anyone who stared at them for too long and Shoyou often looked curiously back at them until they got uncomfortable.

“You know,” Shoyou said before they entered their classroom, “if I don’t get really tall I’ll just have to be the best at jumping.”

At school they separated from each other and Shoyou flitted from classmate to classmate, friend to friend, while Kei sat at his desk with his headphones on blocking out everyone else. Shoyou had a lot of friends, both in their class and other classes, who kept him busy throughout the day. He stopped by Kei’s desk every once in a while but was always quickly pulled away to participate in one game or another. Kei didn’t particularly like it, but he didn’t let his feelings be known.

Shoyou always tried to get Kei to play with them but Kei consistently declined. Interacting with big groups of people made him a bit nervous. They made up games and rules on the fly and he didn’t want to get things wrong and be made fun of and look bad. So instead he kept to himself and got all of his work done ahead of time.

He knew that a lot of the other kids thought he was weird because he didn’t want to play with them, but Shoyou was his saving grace. Shoyou would always loudly declare that Kei was his best friend if he ever heard anyone saying anything bad about him; and the other children listened to Shoyou, so if he said Kei was okay then he must be okay.

When the last bell rang Shoyou would appear by Kei’s side. Every day he waved off offers to play with his friends and chose to go home with Kei instead. On their own they would pick up a volleyball and practice themselves because they weren’t old enough to join the school team, or go to the junior high to see Aki practice, or go home and see Natsu, or any of the other many things they had perfected doing just the two of them.

* * *

It was Shoyou who noticed that Kei was squinting all the time. He pointed it out one night when Kei was trying to read but he waved it off as nothing to worry about. But Shoyou kept watching him and pointed it out again when they were trying to do homework and his mother overheard and then he was subjected to rounds of questions over what he could and couldn’t see.

After school one day he was whisked away to the optometrist who told him that he needed glasses. He made a face and told his mother that he didn’t want glasses. She rolled her eyes and told him that he needed them and to pick a pair.

He refused and she picked a pair for him.

A few days later when his glasses were ready to be picked up, she got them without him and presented them to him at dinner. It was a smart move because Akiteru, Shoyou, and Natsu all begged him to try them on and when he finally did they heaped on the praise until he was embarrassed enough to keep them on.

At least the glasses his mother chose weren’t terrible.

* * *

Natsu doesn’t really understand that she only has one house, one mother, and one brother. Because at three years old she has grown used to being shuffled between her house and her neighbor's house, being played with by Shoyou or Kei or Akiteru, and being cared for by her own mother or Kurena.

Shoyou and Kei seemed to have free range of both of their houses, and Natsu followed suit, coming along with them when she could. They were six years older than she was and didn’t always want her following them around, especially when they were practicing volleyball, but they managed to make time for her.

She liked to sit and color at the table while they did their school work. Every day when they came home from school Kei made sure that they got all of their work done. Shoyou always complained about it but with Kei’s help they would finish everything and get to playing. Sometimes Kei would sit and draw animals with her if Shoyou took a particularly long time finishing things.

When Akiteru got home the three of them raced to the door to talk to him. He would laugh and try to take off his shoes while answering all of their questions. Shoyou complained that Natsu asked silly questions, but Aki always answered her questions first. (He said Kei was never as cute as Natsu was so he was going to keep her, whatever that meant.)

Shoyou and Kei either begged Akiteru to teach them something new, or pleaded with him to come watch what they had learned. Aki always gave in and no matter the weather the four of them would head to the backyard to play volleyball. Natsu knew that Kei liked to set the ball for Shoyou to spike, and that the two of them were good at passing the ball back and forth for long periods of time. But she really liked that after Aki helped them he would get the soft volleyball and try and teach her as well.

Eventually someone would call them in for dinner, and by now their mothers had given up and the two families ate together too. They alternated where they ate unless something came up. Their dinner table was always loud and full of conversation about volleyball or school. Kei was the quietest one out of all of them but Natsu liked to talk to him about animals sometimes and he would tell her all the things he learned about specific animals in school or in books.

At night Natsu peeked into her brother’s room, sometimes he wasn’t there and she knew that he was with Kei next door, but sometimes both of them were there. She thought they were funny at night because Kei was always trying to read while Shoyou kept up a one-sided conversation like Kei was actually answering. She liked to play with her toys on the futon they rolled out for her and watch Kei slowly page through his book while Shoyou leaned heavily against him and said every word that came to mind.

She mostly knew that families didn’t look like hers, but this was hers and she liked it.

* * *

Occasionally Shoyou had detention and Kei walked home alone. The first time he left by himself Shoyou searched the entire school for him and then ran home to find Kei coloring with Natsu. He yelled at Kei for leaving without him but Kei simply frowned back and told him that if he wanted them to walk home together, he shouldn’t get in trouble.

For a while that actually worked. But when you’re friends with practically everybody things have the tendency to get a bit rowdy. Whenever a teacher gave Shoyou detention he would immediately look at Kei with big pleading eyes, silently begging him to wait up, and Kei always shook his head. If he wanted them to walk home together he shouldn’t have gotten in trouble, those were the rules.

Before Kei left for the day Shoyou stopped by his desk and said, “I hope your hands get so cold they fall off.”

Kei covered his mouth to try and stifle his laugh but his half-aborted laugh drew the attention of most of their classmates, “That’s the stupidest thing you’ve ever said to me.”

“Kei!” he complained, “Wait for me.”

“And once,” he kept laughing, unable to stop now that he had started, “you asked me if cereal was soup.”

Shoyou crossed his arms, “Well it could be.”

Kei stood up and patted Shoyou’s head as condescendingly as possible, “I’ll see you later. I’ll try not to lose my hands without you.” Shoyou stuck his tongue out and Kei stifled another laugh.

During his walk home he didn’t expect to see some other kid getting bullied. The other boy looked small, he was curled up but Kei couldn’t imagine that he was that much bigger than Shoyou. Kei almost pretended that he didn’t see anything. He could have kept walking home and nobody would know that he didn’t stop to help that kid.

But in the back of his mind he knew that if Shoyou was there with him he would have already jumped in and tried to fight them off. But Shoyou was the kid who, three years ago, said he’d fight off any bully who looked at them wrong for holding hands, so his best friend was a different breed of animal and perhaps basing his actions off of what he would do wasn’t the best decision.

The bullies noticed him watching and turned to face him instead. Kei simply scoffed the word “Pathetic” at them and used his towering height to his advantage before they fled.

Kei glanced at the still cowering boy and wondered if he should do anything to help, but he knew that he wasn’t the best with words and he already helped by making the bullies leave.

He kept walking.

At home he didn’t tell Shoyou or Akiteru what happened. Both of them would have heaped on the praise and it would have made him uncomfortable. But he did quietly tell Natsu that he helped someone on the way home before asking her to keep it a secret. She was happy that he trusted her with something so important.

Kei didn’t expect to see that boy again. He especially didn’t expect to run into him outside of the gym on the day of volleyball tryouts.

They were finally old enough to join the school’s volleyball team. Kei and Shoyou had the day marked on the calendar and Shoyou had talked about nothing else for weeks prior. While they confidently walked into the gym, the other boy didn’t seem too sure. But then he saw Kei.

“It’s you!” he said, surprised to see Kei.

Kei rubbed the back of his head, he didn’t want to explain to Shoyou how the two of them sort of knew each other because he didn’t want him to make a big deal, “Who are you?” He tried to lie.

The other boy didn’t pick up on his hints, “Yamaguchi Tadashi, you saved me from bullies!”

Shoyou turned to him with stars with his eyes, “Wow, Kei, you’re so cool!”

He quietly chuckled, hoping to abate some of the awkwardness he felt. It didn’t work. “So,” he said instead, “Volleyball?”

“It seems less scary than other sports,” he said quietly.

Shoyou took Yamaguchi’s hands and jumped up and down, “Volleyball is so much fun. Aki has been teaching us and he’s an ace and we can teach you and we can have so much fun together.”

Kei watched Yamaguchi immediately be charmed by Shoyou, “Is Aki your brother?”

Shoyou opened his mouth then closed it and made a face. Kei laughed beside him, he was pretty sure that he was going to say that yes, he was his brother, before he realized that Aki isn’t actually his brother. Kei put his hand on Shoyou’s head, “Aki is my brother. Sho is my neighbor, we grew up together.”

He nodded eagerly, “Kei is my best friend and Akiteru is his brother and Natsu is my sister and my name is Shoyou. Hi!”

Yamaguchi looked a bit dizzy taking in all of the information but he nodded, “Hi.”

* * *

Yamaguchi was a new student, which was why Shoyou didn’t know him already. But after the three of them made the volleyball team and traded class information, they began spending a lot more time together.

During school Yamaguchi didn’t get caught up in Shoyou’s antics. Instead he went and sat with Kei. In the beginning they didn’t talk much, Kei put on headphones and quietly got ahead on his schoolwork and Yamaguchi read the latest manga. After a few weeks Yamaguchi asked for help on some math work and after that they did their work side-by-side and occasionally Kei would point out something he was doing wrong and show him how to fix it.

Yamaguchi was happy that he made a friend. Shoyou was way happier than all of them combined over the fact that Kei had made a friend, which caused Kei to grumble and turn red.

As he spent time with them, he couldn’t help but think that they were a little weird. He didn’t live too far from them so he met up with them on their walk to school and the first time he did and saw them holding hands he did a double take. Kei glared at him, just daring him to say anything, and he kept quiet. Shoyou smiled at him but stopped swinging their hands back and forth.

He watched them for a while. They held hands in the morning, even through the school grounds, but separated before they entered the classroom. Shoyou jumped from friend group to friend group but always made sure to pay attention to Kei. If Kei was having a particularly bad day, Shoyou stayed by his side. (And Yamaguchi only learned to tell if he was having a bad day because Shoyou stayed by his side.) On the walk home they held hands again.

Volleyball practice was much like the classroom. Shoyou was friends with everyone and bounced around but he always returned to Kei’s side and partnered with him when he could.

After a few months, Yamaguchi had to ask.

“Don’t you think it’s weird?” he blurted out one day during lunch when Shoyou was off doing who knows what.

Kei shot him a look, “What?”

Yamaguchi shoved food in his mouth like it would stop him from asking his own question, “You two holding hands all the time?” he asked quietly.

His face burned with embarrassment, most people left them alone about the whole thing, “It’s not that weird,” he mumbled, “It’s a habit. We’re best friends. We’ve been doing it since we were five.” Kei was aware he gave too many excuses too quickly.

But Yamaguchi just sighed wistfully, “I wish I had a best friend.”

“You can be our best friend,” Shoyou popped up out of nowhere to say.

Yamaguchi almost fell out of his chair and when he steadied himself he found Kei glaring at him. He waved his hands, “No, it’s fine, you guys are already--”

Shoyou slapped him on the back, “It’s fine! The more the merrier, right Kei?” He smiled at Kei and Yamaguchi watched him soften.

“Yeah,” he took a deep breath and tried again, “Yeah. We can be friends.”

They were a bit weird, but he liked them. Shoyou always seemed happy and Kei was a bit possessive but he was smart and funny, and after a year of friendship Yamaguchi easily said that they were his best friends.

* * *

Kei had always been tall. Taller than anyone in his class. Much taller than Shoyou.

He didn’t know that growing was going to hurt.

During dinner he tried to massage his leg without anyone noticing but his mother caught him. She stopped her conversation with Yukimi and turned to him with a concerned look, “Do your legs hurt?”

The table, minus Natsu, quieted. He kept his gaze in his lap and nodded. He wasn’t sure why he was trying to hide the fact that his legs hurt but he didn’t like everyone suddenly worrying about him.

“How long has it been happening?” His mother asked.

Kei shrugged but Shoyou spoke up around a mouthful of food to say, “Probably about a week.” The attention turned to Shoyou who was surprised that everybody else seemed surprised, “What? I sleep next to him. The past few nights he sounded like he was in pain but when he woke up he was fine.” He shrugged at Kei as if to say ‘sorry I didn’t say anything about it’ and turned back to his food.

“It’s probably growing pains,” his mother said, “You’ve been shooting up lately.”

Kei turned to his brother, “Did it hurt when you grew?”

Akiteru shook his head, “Not that I remember.”

“Not all children have growing pains,” Shoyou’s mother said, “Not even all tall children.”

Kei bit his lip and shuffled food around his plate, “I guess Shoyou won’t have to worry about them then.”

He slammed his hands on the table and both of their mothers immediately reprimanded him but he didn’t notice, “Hey! I may be short right now but I can jump way higher than you!”

“Yeah, yeah,” he waved a hand dismissively.

After dinner Kei and Shoyou took Natsu into the backyard to play volleyball. She was five now and they were teaching her how to pass the ball. Akiteru hung back to talk with their mothers, which was unusual, but they didn’t question it.

It didn’t take long to tire Natsu out and Shoyou took her next door so Yukimi could put her to bed.

When he did, Akiteru popped his head out and asked if he and Kei could talk. Kei nodded eagerly, Aki was his idol and he would take any chance to talk to him, so he followed his brother into his room and didn’t notice his nervous energy.

“Kei, do you. You. Have you,” he started and stopped a few times before a resigned look crossed his face, “Do you know anything about puberty?”

Kei scrunched up his nose, “Is this about growing pains? They’ll go away.”

“What do you know about puberty?” he asked again.

“I know that I’ll grow, and my voice will change, and my body will grow hair. Why?” He figured that answering his brother’s question was the best way to get his own question answered.

Akiteru sighed, “Anything else?”

Kei took a second to think, “You get smelly? Why?”

“Mom and Shoyou’s mom think you two should finally sleep separately.” Kei looked at him confused, the two of them had been sharing a bed for practically half their life. Akiteru sighed again when he realized his brother wasn’t going to connect the dots, “Kei, please don’t make me talk to you about your penis.”

He physically recoiled, “What! My-- What? Why?”

“Kei,” he groaned, “don’t do this to me. During puberty you will have wet dreams, do you know what that means? Do you really want to do that around your best friend? Or have him do that around you?”

He turned bright red, “I don’t want to talk about this around you!”

“Good!” Aki was turning red as well, “I don’t want to talk to you about it either! Talk to him about it instead!”

Kei left Akiteru’s room and headed to his own where he absentmindedly rubbed his legs until Shoyou showed up again. He meant to talk to him but the second he saw Shoyou he felt like he was going to burst into flames, never in his life had he been more embarrassed than when he was talking to his brother and now he had to do it again. With Shoyou.

Shoyou gave him an odd look, he could see that Kei was floundering but he had no idea what it was about. He knew that Kei would come out with it eventually so he took a seat on Kei’s bed and grabbed one of Kei’s legs to try and help ease the pain.

He immediately pulled his leg away. They couldn’t have this conversation while touching, “Sorry,” he mumbled when he saw Shoyou’s hurt expression, “Aki said weird things to me.”

Shoyou took his leg again, “Puberty? My mom talked to me too,” his hands paused on Kei’s shin, “Do you want me to leave?”

“No, stay. If,” he looked across the room to avoid looking at Shoyou, “if it gets weird we can stop.”

* * *

Kei was nervous about their first day of junior high. He didn’t like going to a new school, he didn’t like going from an upperclassman to someone who didn’t know their way around, and he didn’t like that Shoyou didn’t seem worried at all. How was it that he had to do the worrying for both of them?

Shoyou couldn’t wait for them to walk to school and start the new year so they headed out extra early, hand-in-hand like always, hoping to get to school with plenty of time to spare-- until they remembered that they agreed to meet up with Yamaguchi and they had to wait at their designated meeting spot.

Shoyou swung their hands higher than usual and Kei pretended that he wasn’t holding on tighter than he would any normal day.

Yamaguchi also arrived at their meeting place early and was unsurprised to see his friends waiting. He stood on Kei’s other side and the three of them began walking to their new school.

In elementary school no one was bothered by them holding hands, at least no one was bothered to their faces, but they had started so young people didn’t mind and as the years went by everyone simply got used to them. It was weirder not to see them together. But at the junior high people didn’t know them.

At the junior high people looked at them like they were weird.

Kei really didn’t like it.

When they walked in the front gate he heard snickering but he didn’t think that it was directed at them, there was no reason to think that. But then someone stepped in their path and loudly said, “Hey weirdos, the elementary school is back that way.”

Shoyou squinted at them, “But we’re junior high--”

“Really?” The guy cut him off, “A baby like you who needs to be walked to school is a junior high student? Don’t make me laugh!”

Kei inadvertently tightened his grip on Shoyou’s hand. He was suddenly too aware of how many people were looking at them. The other guy’s booming voice had drawn a crowd and people actually were laughing at them.

“I’m not a baby!” Shoyou yelled, taking a step forward.

The other guy laughed loudly, “Are you going to try and fight me? So if this guy,” he pointed at Kei who still hadn’t managed to say a word, “isn’t your big brother is he your boyfriend then? Are you two gay?”

Shoyou let go of his hand and tried to launch himself at the guy but Yamaguchi stopped him. Kei had completely forgotten that he was there too. “C’mon, it’s not worth getting in trouble over this,” he tried to console his friend, “Let’s find our classroom.

“Yeah,” Kei agreed robotically.

Shoyou tried to catch his eye but Kei avoided looking at him.

On the way home Shoyou tried to take his hand again but Kei pulled away. He didn’t want a repeat of this morning. He didn’t want to be weird or be targeted. Shoyou was hurt but he didn’t try again. The walk home was sluggish and awkward, void of their usual chatter.

When they pulled up to their houses they paused, unsure of what to do. Everyday for years prior one of them would have pulled the other into their house, or they would have wandered in without thinking. But now things were different.

Kei shoved his hands in his pockets, “I’ll see you at dinner.”

When the door closed behind him and Shoyou wasn’t beside him, everything felt wrong.

Dinner wasn’t too much better. Their mothers and Akiteru immediately picked up on the fact that something was wrong. The first and most obvious clue was that they weren’t together before dinner, but then they also hesitated before sitting down at their usual spots next to each other.

Akiteru frowned at them, “Did something happen at school?”

Shoyou opened his mouth to answer and Kei could already hear him spilling the whole story so he cut him off with a quick, “No,” and a sharp look.

But obviously Akiteru didn’t believe him and Shoyou’s downtrodden expression didn’t help, “What happened?”

“We were picked on,” Shoyou mumbled to his plate.

If they didn’t pick up on something being wrong before then seeing Shoyou not being eager to eat a meal would have clued them in right away. Even when he was sick he was happy to see a plate full of food.

Kei’s mother sighed and he had to stop himself from glaring at her, he didn’t think that was an appropriate reaction to their plight, “You knew it was a possibility, what happened?”

Shoyou opened up to them about the whole story, how the upperclassman mocked everything from his height to their supposed sexualities and openly laughed in their faces.

“I don’t understand,” he stabbed his plate, “No one minded before.”

“You two are getting older,” Shoyou’s mother said kindly, “maybe it’s time you separated a little bit.”

He hit the plate more forcibly and was scolded, “But what’s the problem if we’re close? No one will explain it to me? They just say we should stop?”

Their mothers exchanged a look. Kei wondered how much they talked about them. He knew that they had given up on trying to get Shoyou to sleep in his own house when Natsu was a new baby-- but now they were twelve and that was seven years ago.

“It’s a bit… unconventional,” his mother said diplomatically.

“Well I don’t care,” Shoyou said before shoving more food into his mouth than Kei thought humanly possible.

Kei had to decide if he cared. He needed some time.

When Shoyou popped up in his bedroom later that night Kei realized that he never had time to himself, and for the first time that bothered him.

“Go away, Shoyou!” he yelled.

Shoyou’s eyes widened and he took a step back, Kei had never yelled at him before. Sure, he had heard Kei raise his voice before but it had never been directed at him, “I. Okay,” he turned and ran away.

Kei stood frozen for a moment, rage still uncomfortably filling his chest, and he didn’t even have time to think about what he had done when Akiteru peeked in.

“What was that about?”

Kei burst into tears. He didn’t know he was going to cry until he was already doing it so he was equally as surprised as Akiteru. He pushed his glasses up his forehead and tried to wipe away the tears but they kept coming and coming. Akiteru let himself into the room and pulled Kei into a hug and Kei let himself sob harder.

He was exhausted. He did something new today which was always hard for him, he was laughed at for doing something he liked, he yelled at his best friend for doing something they always did. It was too much.

Akiteru rubbed his back until he calmed down.

“So what are you going to do now?” Akiteru asked eventually.

Kei wiped his eyes again, “I wanna go to Shoyou’s house but he probably doesn’t want to see me,” he mumbled.

Akiteru pushed him lightly, “I bet he does.”

“No,” Kei shook his head, “He doesn’t.”

That night for the first time in seemingly forever, Kei tried to sleep by himself. He tossed and turned until the moon was high in the sky and the rest of the household was asleep. After flopping around for too long, he had to admit to defeat. He snuck out of his own bed and over to Shoyou’s house to see if he was still up.

Shoyou was asleep on his bed, laying back-to-back with Natsu. But the futon that Natsu usually slept on was laid out on the floor with a blanket and the pillow that Kei preferred. He crawled in and fell asleep almost instantly.

When he woke up it was to a redhead on both sides.

* * *

After their first day, junior high wasn’t too bad. They continued to hold hands on their way and from school and just like in elementary school, people got used to them. And, just like in elementary school, it helped that Shoyou had a penchant for making friends with practically everybody that he spoke to.

The three of them were in the same class so Yamaguchi came over after school and volleyball practice most days and they worked on their homework together. Shoyou was easily distracted during class but with both of their help he was keeping his grades up.

When they finished their homework the three of them, plus Natsu, went into the backyard to play more volleyball if the weather allowed. Their junior high team was okay but really they were waiting for Akiteru to get home so he would tell them stories about Karasuno and how being the ace in high school was much harder than it was in middle school.

When Akiteru got home the four of them clamored to greet him and he laughed at his eager fan club but as the year went on he came home later and later, citing longer and more difficult practice, and he was often too tired to talk to them.

Kei didn’t mind too much though, his brother was the ace of a powerhouse school and he had to work hard.

So Kei, Shoyou, Yamaguchi, and Natsu worked hard as well.

* * *

Kei was thirteen when his world fell apart.

Shoyou was thirteen when he saw that his dreams were possible.

It was a bit cruel that these events happened at the same time.

For once they had disobeyed Akiteru and went to see him play on the Karasuno volleyball team. Rumor had it they were good enough to get to Nationals and there was no way they were going to miss seeing something as cool as that.

As they watched the court Shoyou pulled roughly at his arm, “Kei, Kei, look,” he pointed at one of the Karasuno players, “He’s so small. He’s small and a starting player. I could do that too.”

Kei could hear the wonder in his voice but he was too distracted to answer. Aki wasn’t on the court. And he wasn’t on the sideline. When he met his brother’s gaze from across the gymnasium he felt like his whole world stopped. He felt like he was dying in slow motion. Kei blindly grabbed Shoyou’s wrist and slid his hand down into his friend’s so he would have something to hold on to. He knew his grip must have been painful but Shoyou didn’t complain.

“Aki,” he gasped out.

Shoyou scanned the court, “Where is Aki,” he looked up at Kei and followed his gaze across the room until he too saw the person who was like a brother to him, “Oh.”

Yamaguchi looked between the two of them frantically, “Do you want to go?”

Shoyou nodded but Kei didn’t move, “C’mon Kei,” he tugged on Kei’s arm, “Let’s go.” Shoyou spared a longing glance at the court where the Little Giant was flying, but he knew he couldn’t stick around to watch.

Kei let himself be led home, he was vaguely aware of Shoyou telling Yamaguchi he could go home, but he was too caught up in his own head.

His brother had lied to him. Akiteru lied to him. How long? Why? Why would he lie to him? Akiteru was his idol, Kei believed in him, wanted to be just like him. He just couldn’t understand.

Shoyou brought him to bed and climbed in next to him even though it was the middle of the day. Shoyou reached up and took off Kei’s glasses, lightly pressed a hand to his shoulder so he would lay down, and ran his fingers through Kei’s hair until he fell asleep. It was nice.

He woke up later partially because he was cold and partially because he heard yelling-- Shoyou yelling. He sat up in bed and pulled the blanket closer around him. He was sluggish from napping and the room was blurry but he could hear Shoyou clear as day, yelling at Akiteru for lying, for lying to Kei. He told him that even if he wasn’t the ace or on the team he would still be their favorite player but right now it was his fault that his best friend was hurt.

Kei laid down again and pulled the blanket over his head. He didn’t want to cry over his brother’s betrayal. He didn’t want to cry over Shoyou standing up for him.

The voices got lower and they weren’t yelling any more but he could still hear stern sounds even if he couldn’t make out words.

Eventually his bed dipped again and Shoyou tugged at the blanket asking to be let in. Kei opened it and allowed him into his cocoon.

“He’s going to try and talk to you,” Shoyou whispered, “You should let him.”

Kei nodded.

* * *

Karasuno made it to Nationals that year and Akiteru hesitantly asked Kei and Shoyou if they wanted to go see them play.

Kei had been rather shy around his brother since he found out that Aki had been lying to him, but Shoyou had forced them to talk and they were slowly getting better. Going to see Karasuno was risky because it reminded him of the betrayal, but he really did love volleyball and he would love to see the top teams in the country compete.

So he agreed to go.

On the way to Tokyo Shoyou burst and finally asked Aki about the short player he saw before. Aki laughed and told him that he was nicknamed the Little Giant and he was one of the best players on the team, if not the best player, and he was even a year younger than Aki himself. Kei could see the stars growing in Shoyou’s eyes.

“Do you want to meet him?” Akiteru asked.

Shoyou nearly jumped out of his seat, “What? I can meet him! Yes!”

Akiteru laughed again, “I’ll see what I can do. We’ve talked before and we practice together but we’re not best friends,” he tapped on his chin, “But I bet if I tell him that I know someone who wants to be like him then he’ll agree to meet you.”

“Yes!” Shoyou threw his hands in the air and almost punched Kei in the face, “I can’t wait! Let’s go to Nationals.”

After Karasuno advanced to the semi-finals Akiteru finally found time to talk to his teammate and ask if he had a moment to talk to a fan. Shoyou jumped up and down eagerly waiting to see if he would be able to meet his new idol.

Eventually Aki came back with a short, black-haired man in tow. Shoyou looked up at him with wide eyes and, for once in his life, was left speechless.

Akiteru put a hand on Kei’s shoulder, “This is my little brother Kei,” Kei was already taller than the other boy despite being years younger, “and this,” he put his other hand on Shoyou’s head, “is my pseudo-brother Shoyou.”

“Hello,” he said shyly, eyes flickering between the two. Shoyou was surprised, his on-court aura was nothing like his off-court persona, “Tsukishima tells me you both play. What position?”

Kei nodded, “Middle blocker.”

Shoyou grumbled, “They barely let me play.”

Shoyou swore he felt the atmosphere of the room change when the Little Giant looked at him again, “You just need to prove you belong on the court.”

* * *

The Spring Inter-Middle Tournament was everything that Shoyou wanted it to be. He was surrounded by junior high teams and even if he was going to spend most of the tournament on the sidelines, he was ecstatic to be there. He clutched Kei’s hand as they walked in and he tried to point out every exciting thing he saw on the way.

Even though Kei was a starting player, damn him and his height, his love for volleyball had cooled after what happened with his brother. Shoyou could still see the spark in his eye when he played but he could also see that Kei was doing everything he could to not nurture that spark into a full blown fire.

Shoyou wanted to blow on it until the whole gymnasium was up in flames.

Okay, maybe his metaphors needed a bit of work.

Their school won the first match of the day and Shoyou alternated between watching just Kei and watching the entire rest of the court-- which was easy when Kei kept being rotated out for the libero. Shoyou didn’t get to step on the court for that match but even Yamaguchi got to play for an entire set.

When the match was over Kei leaned heavily against him, he was hot and sweaty and Shoyou wanted to complain but instead he handed over a water bottle and watched other teams play.

Their second match of the day was against Kitagawa Daiichi. As Shoyou watched them warm up his attention was solely on their setter and his super cool, super fast sets. He could feel his hands and feet itch to try and hit one of those, he didn’t understand why his team looked so unhappy with them. Shoyou watched as the setter failed to sync up with his teammates and he knew, deep down, that he could hit those.

He pointed out the setter to Kei who told him that he was Kageyama Tobio, and he was a bit famous for being a jerk, or something like that

“But Kei,” Shoyou said with stars in his eyes, “Don’t you think his tosses are the coolest?”

Kei watched as Kageyama failed yet again to sync up with his spiker and scoffed, “Not at all. If he keeps tossing like that we should win, easy.”

They didn’t win.

They didn’t win, but Shoyou got to play for a bit and it was exhilarating. He finally felt like he got to show off what he could do, it just sucked that it was at the last tournament of his junior high school career.

But Shoyou always looked up. There was always next year. There was always high school and Karasuno.

On their way out of the building at the end of the day, Shoyou suddenly started running-- pulling Kei along with him-- so he could catch up with Kitagawa Daiichi’s setter. When he was finally within speaking distance he stopped and announced “Next time, I’m going to win!”

Kageyama regarded him coolly, “You’re going to have to get a lot better if you want to beat me.”

“C’mon Shoyou,” Kei tugged on his hand as he glared at Kageyama, “He’s not worth it.”

For the entire ride home Shoyou chatted about how cool the tournament was and how cool Kageyama was. When they got to Kei’s room Shoyou was surprised when Kei picked up the volleyball from his desk and asked if he wanted to go outside for a little bit.

They fell into a familiar pattern, Shoyou threw the ball over Kei’s head for him to set to Shoyou to spike. Shoyou was so caught up in the euphoria of more volleyball that he didn’t notice Kei frowning.

* * *

Their first day of high school started like any other day. Kei and Shoyou met up in front of their houses after getting dressed in their own bedrooms, linked hands, and made their way to their meeting spot with Yamaguchi. Yamaguchi was already waiting for them and quickly took his spot next to Kei and the three of them, instead of making the left turn towards the junior high, turned right towards Karasuno.

When they passed through the gates of the school, Kei tensed, their first day of junior high still fresh in his mind, but no one paid them any attention. The other students were too busy with their own friends or trying to find their own way around to worry about if two of the students were holding hands.

Shoyou tried to pull him towards the gym because he wanted to see where they would be playing volleyball for the next three years but Kei wanted to make his way towards their classroom and get himself situated before class started, they had gotten lucky and the three of them were in the same class yet again-- Shoyou definitely had their help to thank.

“Please, Kei,” Shoyou begged, “Just one look.”

Kei let go of his hand and shoved his shoulder, “Go look at the gym and I’ll see you in class.”

Shoyou looked like he was going to complain that they weren’t going with him, but changed his mind at the last second and raced away, “Okay! See you later!”

Kei and Yamaguchi went inside the main school building and easily found their desks in class 1-4. Yamaguchi chatted about what he thought high school was going to be like and Kei listened while he watched other students file inside, occasionally offering his own comment.

About a minute before the warning bell was going to ring, Shoyou stormed into the classroom with a beat red face and slammed his hands on Kei’s desk.

“Kageyama--”

“--the setter from Kitagawa Daiichi?” Yamaguchi asked.

“is here and he didn’t even remember me!” Shoyou hoisted himself up on Kei’s desk and swung his feet back and forth to try and abate some of his agitated energy, “But then he did remember me and he said that I sucked!”

Kei chuckled.

“Shut up, Kei! How am I going to beat him if we’re on the same team?” He groaned and ran his hands down his face, “This sucks. He sucks.”

“But,” Yamaguchi said placatingly, “You’d get to hit his tosses, you said you really liked them.”

Shoyou perked up, “They were really cool.”

Kei pushed Shoyou off his desk, “Don’t you have your own seat?”

After the first day of class Shoyou managed to cajole Kei into stopping by the gym even though volleyball practice hadn’t officially started yet. He promised that people would be there and said that it was important to make a good first impression, but really Kei agreed so they could walk home together afterwards.

Before they entered the gym Kei grabbed for Shoyou’s hand, he didn’t like new places or new people, especially ones who were definitely going to judge him on sight. Shoyou gave his hand a reassuring squeeze and led him inside with unwavering confidence.

There were not a lot of people in the gym.

They were quickly approached by the captain and vice captain of the team, Daichi and Suga. Daichi welcomed them and explained that this wasn’t everyone but that their team was small. This definitely wasn’t the powerhouse team that Akiteru used to sort of play on.

His stomach twisted when he thought of his brother but he stamped down the feeling. They were fine. This was fine.

He noticed Suga taking in their clasped hands.

“Are you two dating?” he asked when he realized Kei had caught him looking.

Kei tried to let go but Shoyou kept his grip, “No,” Shoyou said simply.

Yamaguchi snickered beside them, “They’re best friends.”

Kei glared at him because he didn’t like how he had said that and when he looked back at Suga he was… Kei couldn’t actually decipher his expression but he decided he didn’t like that either so he scowled at him, seniority be damned.

Daichi looked between the small group like he was trying to put together a puzzle, “You three have known each other long?”

“Yes!” Shoyou said too loudly, “Kei and I have known each other since we were five and we met Yamaguchi when we were ten I think. And we’ve been playing volleyball together forever because--”

Kei pulled on his arm, “He doesn’t need our life story.”

“Good,” Daichi said, “then you know how to work together. That’s good for a team.”

“When does practice start?” Kei asked.

“Officially, next week,” Suga answered, “But we’ll be here every day.”

Shoyou looked up at him with wide and eager eyes, “See, I told you it was a good thing to come today. Now we get to practice!”

Kei pushed his glasses up his forehead and rubbed his eyes, “I want to go home, Shoyou, and I didn’t bring clothes to change into.”

Shoyou frowned at him, “I told you to bring clothes this morning!” He let go of Kei’s hand, “But fine, I’ll see you at dinner.”

As Kei watched Shoyou run over to Kageyama and beg him to toss to him, he overheard Suga ask Yamaguchi if the two of them lived together and his friend shrugged and responded, pretty much.

Kei left the gym and walked home by himself. His chest burned.

* * *

When Kei got home Natsu was already at his kitchen table working on her homework. She was almost ten and had fallen into Kei’s routine of doing her work as soon as she got home from school. Kei couldn’t help but think that she was much smarter than her brother.

He sat down across from her and tried to see what she was working on, it was only her first day of school too, so he was surprised that she had anything to do, but they were all simple assessments to see how far along she was with certain subjects. At a glance it looked like she was doing rather well.

“Hi, Kei-nii,” she said without looking up, “Sho not here?”

“No.”

He must have sounded grumpy because she put down her pencil and looked up at him, “What’s wrong?”

Kei looked over her shoulder and stared intently at the wall behind her, “Nothing, he’s playing volleyball.”

“Without you?” she asked, confused.

He paused. Was that what was bothering him? That Shoyou was doing something without him? That Shoyou seemed so happy to be doing something without him? He nodded at Natsu.

Natsu scoffed at him and for a second he forgot that she was Shoyou’s sister and not his, “That’s stupid. He thinks you’re the best to play with. But if he’s not here will you play with me?” Kei pointed to the work in front of her, “I’ll do it later.”

Usually Kei was the one advocating for getting your work done first, but this time he let it slide and nodded again, “Let’s go to the backyard.”

When Shoyou came home, hours later, he found Kei and Natsu in the backyard passing the ball back and forth. Neither of them knew when Natsu had gotten so good but she only let the ball drop when she saw Shoyou watching them.

She walked up to her brother and punched him in the arm, “Be nice to your best friend, dummy.”

“Hey,” Shoyou complained as he looked between his sister and his friend, “What did I do?”

But neither of them answered him.

Dinner was a confusing affair for Shoyou because Kei and Natsu kept up a constant stream of conversation that he couldn’t seem to break into and he didn’t know why he was being left out. Eventually he stopped trying to interrupt and talked to their mothers about his first day of high school. They were eager to hear about how it went so he did a dramatic retelling of his entire day until he got to the part where Kei went home without him and it clicked that maybe that’s where he went wrong.

“Good night, Kei-nii,” Natsu leaned over and kissed his cheek before rising from the table, “thanks for playing with me but I need to finish my homework. You should have made me finish before!”

Kei smiled at her, “It was all easy stuff, and you’re smart,” he pointed to Shoyou, “smarter than that guy, at least.”

“Hey!” Shoyou said, partially offended but mostly happy that he was being included even if it was to be insulted, “I’m plenty smart! We’re in the same class.”

“Thanks to my help.”

“I’m still there!” he crossed his arms and Kei laughed at him. It felt like things were back to normal.

When they were in Kei’s bedroom for the night Shoyou reached out and grabbed Kei’s shirt.

“Hey,” he said hesitantly, “Are you mad at me?”

A few expressions crossed Kei’s face before he answered, “No, I’m not.” But then he brushed Shoyou’s hair out of his eyes and pressed a kiss to his forehead, “Good night Shoyou.”

Kei climbed into bed and rolled over so his back was to Shoyou. Shoyou stared at him.

That was.

That was completely normal. Right?

He climbed in after him.

* * *

  
＼(＾∀＾)メ(＾∀＾)ノ


	2. Chapter 2

＼(＾∀＾)メ(＾∀＾)ノ

* * *

  
When Kei woke up Shoyou wasn’t there, but that wasn’t too unusual because Shoyou often woke up before him and got up in search of food. He blindly reached out and felt around for his glasses, his fingers left smudges on the lenses but for once he didn’t care. He put them on and stared at the ceiling.

He kissed Shoyou’s forehead last night.

He didn’t even think before doing it. His body just moved on its own and before Shoyou could say anything about it Kei crawled into bed and refused to look at him. Frankly he was surprised that Shoyou decided to join him in the bed afterwards.

Kei’s heart had thudded noisily in his chest until Shoyou’s breathing had evened out, but even then he was too wound up to sleep. What had he been thinking? He could have lost his best friend and because… Because… His thoughts raced. He really had no idea why he had done it. Was he losing his mind? Was this part of puberty?

For a moment he considered asking Akiteru but he quickly scrapped the idea. Aki would either make fun of him or give him one of those looks that Kei didn’t understand. He hated that look. It was some combination of pity and sadness and confusion and worry-- maybe, he wasn’t sure. Everytime Aki looked at them like that Kei had to look away. It made something in his chest pull and he didn’t like not understanding.

He rolled over. He didn’t like not understanding things. Kei was at the top of their class because studying and learning helped lessen a pit of anxiety that laid deep in his stomach. Knowledge was power but feelings were so confusing.

The alarm clock on his desk beeped annoyingly, signaling it was time to get up and he heaved himself out of bed with a loud sigh.

He got dressed slowly and trudged into the kitchen. Breakfast time at the Tsukishima-Hinata households weren’t as organized as dinner. Normally everyone ate in their own houses, Kei and Shoyou split up to get dressed, but occasionally someone was sent to the other house for one reason or another and stayed for breakfast. So it wasn’t too unusual for Kei to only see his mother in the kitchen.

“Good morning,” she smiled at him and handed him some water to chase away his morning dryness, “I saw Shoyou this morning and he said he was going to morning practice. I didn’t think to ask him then but don’t you have to go too?”

Kei frowned at her, “Practice doesn’t start until next week.”

His mother hummed pleasantly as she set out food for him, “I’m sure he said practice. I could have misheard. But you know how eager he is though.”

“Yeah,” Kei stabbed at his food. Eager to get away from him in the morning.

Even though he didn’t like to eat in the morning Kei finished half of his plate and by himself walked to where they usually met up with Yamaguchi, hands firmly stuffed in his pockets and shoulders drawn up to his ears. Yamaguchi squinted at him when he saw him alone and tried to check behind him to see if Shoyou was lagging behind but Kei stomped ahead without a word.

“So,” Yamaguchi asked eventually, “Where is he?”

“Morning practice apparently,” Kei grumbled out.

Yamaguchi looked behind them again like he expected Shoyou to jump out behind them and announce it was all a prank, but his friend’s sour mood told him that it definitely wasn’t a joke, “Do you want to stop by the gym?”

Kei almost said no, if Shoyou wanted to avoid him then his stupid friend could do whatever he wanted, but he found himself nodding against his wishes and when they entered school grounds they made their way towards the volleyball team’s gym.

They were surprised to find that people were actually practicing there. It seemed like they weren’t only doing unofficial afternoon practice but unofficial morning practice too. Across the gym Shoyou and Kageyama were yelling at each other about something, or maybe Shoyou was being enthusiastic about something and Kageyama was yelling, it was a bit hard to tell.

But when Shoyou noticed Kei and Yamaguchi standing in the doorway he jogged over to greet them.

“Good morning!” he chirped happily.

When he got close enough Kei put a hand on Shoyou’s forehead and pushed him away, “You left without me.”

“You were sleeping!” he said, offended that his best friend would dare push him like that.

“You could have woken me up,” Kei crossed his arms and looked away.

Shoyou crossed his arms back and squared his shoulders, “You hate being woken up! You’d yell at me if I even tried and then you wouldn’t have let me go to morning practice and I really wanted to go.”

Kei tried his hardest not to blush. He knew that no one else in the gym would decipher what Shoyou just said as ‘you’d make me get back into bed with you’ but that was what he just said. He felt that familiar anxiety of whenever someone tried to talk to them about their relationship bubble in his stomach, “How’d you even know there was a morning practice,” he snapped in an attempt to keep his cool.

“I didn’t,” Shoyou shrugged, “I just wanted to get here before Kageyama and I thought I could practice while I was here.”

“You’re such an idiot,” Kei sighed.

There was a loud laugh from inside the gym and a bald student that Kei didn’t recognize doubled over, “You two fight like an old married couple.”

“They are an old married couple,” Yamaguchi called out to the delinquent-looking kid, making him actually fall to the floor laughing.

“Shut up, Yamaguchi,” he turned to glare at his friend, “We are not.”

Yamaguchi shrugged, “Sorry, Tsukki, but you two have been together for ten years.”

Shoyou’s eyes lit up, “Kei! When do you think our ten year anniversary is? I should ask my mom when we moved in.”

Kei took a deep breath, turned around, and exited the gym without a word. He couldn’t handle this right now.

* * *

Kageyama was a jerk. Kageyama was a jerk and Shoyou wanted to hit one of his tosses so badly. They looked so cool and he could just imagine what the ball would feel like smacking against the palm of his hand. He wanted to at least try it, but Kageyama refused to work with him.

Shoyou ran out of the classroom during their lunch break after briefly telling Kei and Yamaguchi that he was headed to the gym. He expected to find Kageyama there practicing so he was surprised when the gym was empty. That didn’t stop him from stepping inside and grabbing a ball so he could practice on his own.

He was used to practicing with a partner. Kei was almost always around and willing to put up with his need to keep going at least for a little while. Before Akiteru went to college he spent time practicing with Shoyou as well. Even Natsu who was still in elementary school was getting good at volleyball and made a decent partner to practice with. Being by himself with the ball felt weird.

Volleyball was a team sport. It wasn’t supposed to feel lonely.

Shoyou was about to put the ball away and head back to his classroom when Suga poked his head into the gym and offered to practice with him. He eagerly accepted the offer.

At this point Shoyou didn’t know too much about Suga, he was an upperclassman and a setter but he was kind and nothing like Kageyama. They spent the rest of the period passing the ball back and forth and Suga complimented him on some of his receives. He told Suga about Akiteru teaching them and the hours playing with Kei in their backyards.

The best part though was when Suga offered to set for him so he could spike the ball later. Volleyball was a team sport and Suga did a good job at making him feel welcome.

After class ended he ran to the club room to get changed and waited for Kageyama. He was going to get Kageyama to interact with him. When they were both in the gym he marched over to the other boy, held out a volleyball, and loudly declared, “We’re on the same team.”

Kageyama stared at him.

“So we need to work together,” he kept going, “Your tosses are like zoom and I’m really zoomy. I want to hit one.” His last sentence rang around the room.

Kageyama took the ball from his hands and looked away from Shoyou, “Maybe.” But Shoyou knew that look. Kei made the same expression when Shoyou asked him to do something that he didn’t want to do but knew that he was going to end up doing. Shoyou tried to hide his smile, for Kei the best thing to do was let him sulk until he decided to go along with whatever was asked of him in the first place.

He backed away from Kageyama like he was a skittish animal. The other boy glared at him and Shoyou couldn’t help but laugh.

Shoyou glanced around the room. Yamaguchi had shown up for unofficial practice but Kei didn’t. He made eye contact with his friend from across the room, silently asking where Kei was, but Yamaguchi shook his head. Shoyou frowned. He really thought that Kei would have shown up today.

Kei was going to be difficult later, Shoyou thought as he ran through some stretches. Shoyou had left without him that morning, then possibly embarrassed him at the gym with the old married couple though (which was stupid to play along with because last night Kei kissed his forehead and maybe they needed to talk about that?), and then Shoyou ditched him at lunch, and then he ran out again when the last bell rang. No wonder Kei walked home by himself.

When he finished stretching he took a second to lay on the floor and stare at the ceiling. He had to apologize to his best friend. But first, practice.

Practice was fun yet hectic. Their team was small but had a lot of personality. It made for a very noisy gym. True to his word Suga set for him and he got to hit a few spikes. But the best part was everyone practically falling over when they saw him jump.

“What the hell?” Tanaka yelled, “You can almost jump over my head!”

Daichi blinked at him, “Wow…” he seemed dazed, like he was figuring out how he could use Shoyou’s abilities.

Kageyama simply stared at him but his eyes looked slightly wider.

It was nice being part of a team.

Shoyou ran home, easily let himself into the Tsukishima household, and would have tackled Kei, but he was stretched out on his bed reading and Shoyou knew that if he damaged one of Kei’s books he wouldn’t live long enough to apologize for not being around.

He had to stop himself from tackling Kei though, and that momentum had to go somewhere. So he fell on the floor. Kei turned the page, not bothering to look away from his book. Shoyou was an expected intrusion. But Kei did lift one of his arms and Shoyou scrambled to get up before Kei rescinded the offer.

He climbed into the bed and curled up next to Kei, resting his head on Kei’s shoulder. He had expected Kei to be reading something for class, or one of those oddly advanced non-fiction books, or one of those weird science-fiction books that Kei swore he didn’t really like but read a lot of anyway, but he was reading a very simple introductory book about dinosaurs. Shoyou recognized that book. Kei had read it and reread it when he was upset with Akiteru.

“Are you mad at me?” Shoyou asked quietly.

Kei turned the page again, “No.”

“You only read this when you’re upset.”

He closed the book, “Why do you think that?”

Shoyou shrugged lightly, “You read it a lot after the thing with Aki.” He waited for Kei to deny what he said, but he didn’t, instead he traced the words on the cover with his fingers, “So you’re not upset with me?”

“Are you going to ditch me again tomorrow morning?”

Shoyou scrunched up his nose, “I wanna go to morning practice. You hate getting up early.”

Kei shoved his forehead lightly, “Just wake me up.”

“You’ll definitely be mad at me if I wake you up,” he half joked as he watched Kei trace the title of the book over and over again. Did he hold Kei’s hand today? He couldn’t remember and that in itself was weird.

They laid there until Kei’s mother called them for dinner and when they got up to head to the kitchen Shoyou made a point to hold his hand. Kei gave him a half smile which relieved some of the pressure from his chest. He hated worrying about if Kei was mad at him.

That night, Kei kissed him on the forehead again as he said goodnight, and Shoyou didn’t think it was weird.

* * *

“Kei, wake up,” Shoyou whisper yelled at his still sleeping best friend, “if you don’t get up I’m going to leave without you again.”

Kei’s eyes peeked open and he probably meant to glare at Shoyou but it looked like he was squinting. Shoyou handed him his glasses.

“We don’t want to be late for morning practice!” He said, a bit louder now that Kei had opened his eyes.

“Shoyou,” Kei mumbled, “I will murder you and you’ll never get to play volleyball again.”

Shoyou ran his hands down his face, “You asked me to do this! Fine, I’m going.”

Kei’s hand shot out of the bed. He meant to try and grab Shoyou’s arm but he wasn’t awake enough for his limbs to listen to him and he ended up punching Shoyou in this side, “‘m coming too. Give me a minute.”

“Why’d you punch me,” he grumbled.

Eventually Kei dragged himself out of bed and managed to get dressed. He watched Shoyou eat and his stomach churned at the thought of eating both so soon after waking up and so early in the morning but he managed to sip on some cold water. After not nearly enough time Shoyou pulled him out of the house and they began walking to Karasuno.

It was way too early according to Kei. He could still be sleeping. He sort of felt like he was still sleeping, Shoyou was pulling him along and keeping him steady. A morning person he was not.

By the time they arrived at the school he wasn’t any better. He vaguely heard Kageyama yell something about winning which didn’t make any sense because there was no competition going on, but he brushed it off. It was too early to worry about what other people were doing.

Shoyou tried to run off and do something but Kei didn’t let go of his hand and pulled him back. He pressed Shoyou’s back against his chest, draped his arms over his shoulders, and buried his face in Shoyou’s hair.

“Stay,” he muttered quietly. If he stayed still for a bit maybe he could pick up a few extra minutes of sleep.

After a moment he took his glasses off and hooked them on Shoyou’s shirt so they wouldn’t get crushed between them. He stayed still.

Other members filed in and they probably looked at them oddly, but Kei was too busy dozing to notice.

Kei was startled awake by Daichi’s loud voice ringing through the gym announcing the start of practice. When Kei opened his eyes Shoyou passed his glasses back but even with them on his eyes were still blurry with sleep. He’d adjust to morning practice after a while but for now he was going to drag through him.

He tried to half-ass the morning stretching routine but Shoyou wasn’t having it and turned everything into a paired stretch that he felt deep in his muscles. By the time it was over he was much more awake than he was before and that meant he noticed his new teammates looking at him. Looking at them.

He scowled. So what if they were comfortable touching each other. They were best friends, it’s not like they were doing anything weird. It’s not like they could look at them and just know that these two high schoolers slept next to each other and that Kei had taken to kissing Shoyou on the forehead before they went to bed. That would be preposterous.

Kei scowled harder.

“Okay, now that all of our new first years are here we can make our announcement,” Daichi said, gaining all of their attention, “Every year we have a practice match to assess the first years. This year it’ll be a 3-on-3 match. The teams will be Kageyama, Hinata, and Tanaka,” he pointed to the bald second-year, “and Tsukishima, Yamaguchi, and myself.”

* * *

Shoyou bounded over to Kageyama as soon as the teams were announced, smiling and waving at Kei and Yamaguchi as he made his retreat. Now Kageyama definitely had to work with him, it was the captain’s orders after all.

Kageyama did not appear to feel the same way. He openly told Shoyou that his lack of experience on the court hurt their chances of winning so he was only going to set the ball to Tanaka, because he intended to win and Shoyou was unnecessary.

“I’m here too!” Shoyou bellowed, drawing the attention of everyone in the gym as he launched himself vertically to catch the ball that Kageyama was attempting to set.

The gym fell silent as they watched them clash yet again. Shoyou shoved the ball in Kageyama’s chest, “I’m fast and jump high. I want to hit your zoomy set! Let me try it!”

Kageyama looked like he had bitten into a lemon, “Fine, we can try during regular practice,” he glanced around the room and everyone quickly looked away and pretended that they weren’t watching them. Everyone except Kei. “Tell your friend not to glare at me.”

Shoyou spun around and saw that Kei was indeed glaring at them. He waved at him, “Don’t worry about him, that’s just his face. It’s been stuck that way since we were kids.”

“You’re…. Close?” Kageyama asked, even though it sounded like it pained him to get the words out.

“Yeah,” Shoyou nodded, “best friends since we were little.”

Kageyama grunted and walked away, they needed to get ready for morning classes, but for some reason Shoyou felt like he took one step forward and two steps back.

At practice that afternoon he finally managed to get Kageyama to work with him. He wished that working together came with a bit less yelling, but he gave as good as he got so he wasn’t feeling too beaten down. He could hit Kageyama’s regular tosses, and they were so much different from the setter’s back in middle school or Kei’s in their backyard, but he couldn’t hit the zoomy one no matter how many times he tried.

So he kept jumping and jumping, over and over.

Kei tried to get him to go home when practice ended but he opted to stay late with Kageyama instead and keep trying. He was going to get it, he knew if he kept trying he was going to get it.

Suga made a suggestion and Shoyou took a leap of faith and was rewarded for his efforts. He hit Kageyama’s zoomy set and it felt amazing slapping against the palm of his hand. It made his chest squeeze with happiness and he could see the amazement and joy on Kageyama’s face.

They did it again and again until his legs felt like jelly and then they did it one more time just because they could. They probably would have done it again but Tanaka kicked them out of the gym which was for the best because he still needed to walk home.

At home Kei sat next to him while he puzzled through his homework, it shouldn’t have been that difficult but he was still buzzing with his victory with Kageyama and he was finding it hard to sit still. Kei bumped his shoulder and told him to concentrate so Shoyou slapped his cheeks to try and pull himself together. It wasn’t as good as hitting a volleyball but it helped reset his brain.

He grinned at Kei that night when he kissed him on the forehead and before Kei could roll over Shoyou grabbed his shirt and returned the gesture. He was still vibrating with happiness and he wanted to share the joy.

* * *

They won the 3-on-3 match and Shoyou knew that’s what it felt like to be part of a team.

(He tried to get Kei and Kageyama to shake hands after the match but neither of them were having any part of it. They were both similarly stubborn and wanted nothing to do with the other but that didn’t ruin his image of being on a cohesive team.)

* * *

Kei didn’t like Kageyama. As far as he was concerned, there was nothing to like about him. He didn’t even like Kageyama’s sets, no matter how much Shoyou ranted about how cool they were, they were weird and Kei didn’t like hitting them. He didn’t like how everyone was acting like Kageyama was the greatest thing to ever happen to the volleyball club, so what if he got them a practice match with Aoba Josai.

But really, and Kei was self aware enough to realize this, he didn’t like how Shoyou was acting like he was the greatest thing ever and worthy of all of his time.

Shoyou had a new routine and it felt like Kei was barely part of it. In the morning Shoyou got up extra early so he could have an imaginary race to the gym with Kageyama and have pre-morning practice with him, which meant they no longer walked to school together. Instead Kei got up by himself and met up with Yamaguchi and they walked to regular morning practice together.

When they arrived Shoyou finished up what he was doing with Kageyama and greeted Kei like he wasn’t abandoning his long time best friend. Because Shoyou was already warmed up he helped Kei stretch while he babbled about what he and Kageyama had been doing.

Practice and class time were very much like the previous years. Shoyou floated from person to person, talking to and charming everyone but he always made his way back to Kei with an interesting story or anecdote. In the past Kei hadn’t minded this arrangement because, and he could admit this, he still monopolized most of Shoyou’s time, but now-- for the first time-- he kind of hated his best friend’s outgoing personality.

After practice Shoyou would stay late to work with Kageyama some more on their freak-quick attack and Kei walked home with Yamaguchi. He tried not to sulk about how his friend was replacing him.

Yamaguchi wasn’t sure if he should leave Kei alone to wallow in his self pity for a while or talk to him and distract him from his plight, so he oscillated between the two decisions, babbling on for a while before leaving a long and uncomfortable silence and then doing it again. Kei appreciated his company.

When Kei got home he immediately did his homework, often at the same table as Natsu, and then he either did something with her-- be it volleyball or helping one of their mother’s with dinner, or retired to his room to read for a bit.

Shoyou got home much later. He always raced into the bathroom to wash up then he ate dinner and did his school work at the same time while Kei looked over his shoulder and pointed out any mistakes because it was only a matter of time before he crashed, exhausted at his self imposed schedule.

Sometimes Kei thought he was the only one who missed the closeness they had weeks before, but then Shoyou would scoot his chair closer, or drop his pencil to look over his answers and absentmindedly take Kei’s hand, or press his forehead to Kei’s arm and sigh like it's the first break he’s gotten all day.

But even with all of that, Shoyou didn’t join them in the backyard after school. He didn’t light up when he hit Kei’s sets.

Kei didn’t like it.

* * *

They took a bus to Aoba Josai. Kei pulled Shoyou into the seat next to him before he picked anywhere else, and that was probably for the best because Shoyou was nervous. Kei told him to put his head between his knees and he rubbed his back in small circles to try and help the nausea pass.

When that didn’t help Kei took the headphones he kept around his neck and placed them on Shoyou’s ears and played some low and calming music. The combination of clutching his friend’s hand, being hunched over, getting his back rubbed, and the music kept him from puking on the bus.

That would have been embarrassing.

Shoyou kept a hold on Kei’s hand as they exited the bus. He was still queasy with anxiety and Kei seemed cool as ever. The jerk.

Kageyama was pricklier than usual. The frowns he usually gave Shoyou were different but he wasn’t able to decipher them. There was obviously something about being at Seijou that set him off, that much was obvious, but for some reason it was compounded when he looked at Kei and Shoyou

They managed to beat Seijou. No one had really expected them to win, they were still a ragtag team that didn’t know how to work together, but they won!

Shoyou had jumped on Kei’s back and was congratulating him on receiving Oikawa’s serve when he heard the first call of, “Yahoo, Tobio-chan.”

Kageyama bristled, “Oikawa-san,” he said, bowing his head politely.

Oikawa opened his mouth to say something else but was smacked in the back of a head by a volleyball. He quickly turned around, “Iwa-chan! That hurt!”

Iwaizumi grabbed Oikawa by his collar and began dragging him away. He glanced at Kageyama, “Ignore everything that comes out of this shitty guy’s mouth.”

“I haven’t even said anything!” he complained.

“And now you’re not going to!” he practically threw Oikawa to the other side of the gym, “Good seeing you again Kageyama.”

There was a beat of silence as Iwaizumi walked away.

“What just happened?”

Kageyama sighed, “Oikawa-san was my senior back in junior high. Iwaizumi is,” he stole a glance at Shoyou who was still leaning heavily against Kei’s back, Kei looked like he had simply accepted his fate, “his childhood friend who keeps him in line.”

“That’s why you don’t like Kei!” Shoyou said loudly.

“What?” Kei and Kageyama said at the same time.

Shoyou grinned at them like he figured out a complicated puzzle, “You don’t like childhood friends but I can hit your zoomy set so you have to like me so you just don’t like Kei.”

There was another beat before most of the team burst out laughing.

“What?” Shoyou looked around confused, “What did I say?”

* * *

It took a month for Kei to boil over.

When Shoyou arrived home he announced his presence and headed for the bath but found Kei blocking his path, standing in the hallway with his arms crossed and shoulders squared, with Natsu peeking out behind him.

“You’re coming with us,” Kei said.

Shoyou’s shoulders sagged, “Kei,” he whined, “let me take a bath.”

“No, you’re coming in the backyard with us.”

“Yeah, Sho,” Natsu scolded, “you never spend time with us anymore.”

Shoyou looked ashamed that even his little sister was scolding him for skipping out on them. Kei knew that Shoyou was working hard for his spot on the team but that didn’t mean that he could just never be around. Besides, the routine that he had set up for himself couldn’t be healthy, he needed a break, and what was a better way to take a break than to spend time with some of his favorite people.

Kei and Natsu each took one of Shoyou’s hands, “You should see what Natsu can do now, she’s gotten really good and has been waiting to show you.”

They walked him outside and had him sit down so Natsu could show off what she had learned. Kei handed her the soft volleyball, she threw it high above Kei’s head (even though he had knelt down to be a more reasonable height for her) so he could set the ball, and she spiked the ball down over an imaginary net.

Shoyou sprung to his feet and swept Natsu into his arms, “That was amazing! When did you learn to do that!”

“Me and Kei-nii have been practicing!” she laughed, “But you keep coming home real late and were too tired to see.”

Shoyou tried to look at Kei and confirm but Kei wouldn’t meet his gaze, which was confirmation enough. He let out a small huff, “I have homework to do but how about I skip it for tonight and we play. I bet I can hit the ball harder than you. Kei, will you set for me?”

“Nuh uh,” Natsu pouted, “I can hit it way harder!”

Kei tried to conceal his small smile as he picked up the volleyball, “Alright, alright, whose first?”

After spending more time in the backyard together than they had in the weeks prior they eventually had to go inside to eat and bathe, but all of their spirits were renewed.

When Shoyou was done with his bath he found Kei stretched out on his bed reading a book and Natsu on the futon playing with some of her own things. They both quietly acknowledged his arrival, tired from the day’s activities.

Shoyou figured that he should at least look at some of the homework he had but he chose to lay down next to Kei instead. He was reading a sci-fi novel. Shoyou tried to read over his shoulder for a bit but Kei was most of the way through the book so he didn’t understand it and Kei read much faster than he did and kept turning the page before he was done.

The chapter came to an end and Kei slipped in his bookmark and closed the book. He turned to face his best friend and they spent a long moment staring at each other.

“I’m sorry,” Shoyou blurted out.

Kei made a face, “About what?”

“We haven’t walked together or spent time together in a while. Kageyama--”

“Stop,” Kei cut him off and Shoyou snapped his mouth close, but it didn’t seem like Kei was going to continue.

They laid in relative silence for a few more minutes, only the sound Natsu’s humming filled the room, while both of them thought over what they wanted to say.

Eventually Kei sighed, “Just stop. I don’t want to hear about Kageyama.” He knew that he probably sounded like a petulant child, but Kageyama was already taking his friend away, he didn’t need to hear more about him.

“I want to be better at volleyball,” Shoyou said, “I want to be like the Little Giant. But I need to get better. I need to practice more and if I just spend more time…”

“With Kageyama.”

“Kageyama gets me on the court!” He shoved Kei’s arm, “The quick attack means I get to play and I get to get better. Why are you mad at me about that?”

Kei stopped himself from rolling over, “I’m not. I’m mad at you for ditching me for someone you barely know. Yamaguchi too.”

Shoyou blinked at him a few times and his eyes changed to that look he got when he was solving a particularly difficult problem, “You miss me.”

Kei didn’t stop himself from rolling over this time.

“You miss me!” Shoyou grinned, “I miss you too. How about, at least once a week we’ll walk to school and home together?”

“Whatever,” Kei grumbled.

* * *

In the morning Shoyou didn’t race out of the house like he was being chased, instead he waited for Kei and linked their hands once they got outside. Shoyou swung their joined hands back and forth and Kei didn’t even pretend to grumble about it.

Yamaguchi was visibly surprised to see the two of them together at the meeting spot but didn’t say anything out loud. He took his usual position on Kei’s other side and the three of them walked to school just like old times. Shoyou smiled widely the whole time, he hadn’t realized how much he had missed spending his mornings with them.

Kei wasn’t much of a talker in the morning but Shoyou and Yamaguchi talked around him about what drills they were going to do and last night's assignments and the latest manga. Even though he was just walking to school, Shoyou felt like he was having a good meal or waking from a refreshing nap.

When they got to the school Kageyama was waiting for him, a frown permanently fixed to his face.

“Where were you this morning?” he practically yelled.

He held up the hand still holding Kei’s, “With Kei,” he said like it should be obvious and he hadn’t been meeting up with Kageyama early for weeks.

Kei smirked, “I guess the King can’t control his subjects.”

Kageyama glared at him and Shoyou squeezed his hand hard, “Kei, be nice.”

Shoyou turned back to Kageyama, “I’m here now, let’s go practice!”

“Idiot!” Kageyama scolded, “You have to stretch first!”

Shoyou kept up his spend-more-time-with-Kei day by eating lunch in their classroom instead of wandering around talking to everyone he could or trying to sneak in more volleyball practice. He did make one pit stop to invite Kageyama to eat with them so the four first years would have some time to bond off the court.

Kei was not thrilled when Shoyou walked back into the classroom with Kageyama but he did manage to keep his comments to himself, which Shoyou counted as a win.

Kageyama was uncomfortable being with them at first but both Shoyou and Yamaguchi talked to him like he was a regular person and not a hostile alien preparing to take over and he slowly calmed down. He kept his guard up around Kei, but Kei was giving off strong ‘go away’ vibes that Shoyou and Yamaguchi had learned to ignore long ago.

When Shoyou polished off his meal he began picking at Kei’s meal and, to Kageyama’s surprise, Kei let him.

“You should eat more,” Shoyou said as he took another bite of Kei’s food, “you don’t eat breakfast, you don’t even eat enough at dinner.”

“Yes, mom,” Kei said sarcastically, “sorry I don’t have three stomachs like you.”

“Hey,” Shoyou yelled, “I have four stomachs. Like a cow.”

Kageyama watched them quip back and forth like he was watching a particularly interesting volleyball rally. But when there was a moment of silence he had to ask, “Are you two dating?”

The two of them froze and Yamaguchi snickered quietly beside him. After a second Shoyou shook his head, “No. Does it look like we are?”

“We’re just best friends,” Kei said tensely.

“Best friends,” Yamaguchi mimicked.

Kageyama looked between the three of them, he didn’t understand what he was missing out on but he did understand that he was missing out on something. He chalked it up to being a childhood friends thing. Oikawa and Iwaizumi were weird too.

He shrugged, “Okay.”

* * *

Shoyou always believed that good things happened to those who worked for them, so when he showed up to practice one day and they had a coach he couldn’t help but hollar with joy. The team had been working so hard but now they had someone to guide them through their training and it was the same guy who sold them meat buns. The gods were definitely smiling down on them.

Coach Ukai was in awe of their quick attack and Shoyou preened under the attention. It felt good to be noticed. It felt amazing to be good at volleyball. But he wasn’t satisfied, he had to keep getting better.

And the gods kept smiling down on them and gave them his very first training camp ending with a practice match against a team which was apparently their fated rival.

Shoyou couldn’t wait for the training camp to start. He couldn’t wait to spend all day practicing volleyball and honing his skills and then test them out against a team coming all the way from Tokyo. He tried to share his excitement with Kei but Kei scrunched up his nose and commented about not wanting to spend multiple days and nights doing nothing by volleyball.

Shoyou couldn’t relate.

The training camp facilities were amazing. Or, at least, they were amazing to him. Logically he knew that they were nothing to write home about, but he was at a training camp and that in itself was worth something to him.

The whole team was going to sleep on futons in one room, so when they got in they all selected where they wanted to sleep. Shoyou wasn’t surprised to see everyone bunch up by year. He had Kageyama on one side of him and Kei on the other, with Yamaguchi on Kei’s other side. Even though they were getting ready for lights out he felt like he could run a marathon. His skin was buzzing with the need to do something.

He hopped up, told the others that he would be right back, and paced the halls in hopes of getting out some of his energy. They already had a full practice and they had to get up early to officially start their training camp so he should be working on winding down, but all Shoyou could think about was how he could go for a run.

Or, he did until he was accidentally terrified by Noya with his hair down, because then he had to wonder if he also looked more childish when his hair was wet and down.

Everyone made their way back to where they were sleeping and Shoyou collapsed on top of futon with a soft thud. He rolled over to face Kei, ready to regale him with the tale of The House Ghost That Was Noya when he realized just how far away Kei was. He frowned at him.

It was a silly thing to worry about but he usually didn’t sleep so far away from Kei. He was practically sleeping by himself. He knew that was a preposterous thought because he was in a room with eleven other people but there was a difference between sharing a room and sharing a mattress.

“Shut up,” Kei said even though Shoyou hadn’t said anything.

Shoyou nodded. He could be slow on the uptake sometimes but he understood. They had defended their actions to their families before after they thought that they had gotten too old to share a bed, there was no reason to alert the whole team that they did something so unusual.

Coach Ukai had called them lovebirds the other day when he was helping Kei stretch and they had to explain again that they weren’t dating. Shoyou wasn’t sure if Coach believed them, he got this look on his face that people often did when they looked at the two of them. It was confusing and he didn’t really understand it.

Shoyou rolled to the edge of the futon closest to Kei. When the lights went out Kei followed suit. They were close but it wasn’t the same, they weren’t sharing body heat, they were just looking at each other, unsure of what to do.

Shoyou reached out and grabbed Kei’s hand. He tucked Kei’s hand under his cheek and sighed softly, like the contact was going to help him sleep easier. He discreetly placed a kiss on Kei’s palm because there was no way they could subtly do their foreheads.

Kei glared at him and Shoyou read it as ‘if you drool on me, I’ll kill you,’ so he tried to give his best ‘when have I ever drooled on you’ smile back, to which Kei sharpened his glare as if to say ‘all the time and you know it’.

He smiled wider but closed his eyes, pressed his nose into Kei’s palm, and tried to fall asleep.

He didn’t sleep the best, eventually Kei rolled over, taking his hand back with him and practically smacked Shoyou in the face, but he did manage to sleep. He may not have been at one hundred percent but he was at least at ninety.

But maybe he needed that extra ten percent or else he wouldn’t have somehow gotten lost on what should have been a simple run.

Beeping noises caught his attention and he saw a kid, probably around his age, with bleached blond hair playing a game. Before he could think better he found himself looking over the other boy’s shoulder to find out what he was playing. Shoyou didn’t have a lot of time for video games so he found them really interesting when he got a chance to see or play them.

The other boy either didn’t notice or didn’t mind the intrusion and let Shoyou watch him play. At least until Shoyou noticed his volleyball shoes and he ruined the peaceful atmosphere to ask the obvious question.

He learned that the other boy’s name was Kozume Kenma and he was a year older than Shoyou but he didn’t like hierarchies in sports so it was okay to call him Kenma. Shoyou thought he was really cool. Even how he talked about volleyball, in his slightly detached way that almost reminded him of Kei, was cool because in the end he smiled and said his team was strong together.

Shoyou felt that itch he sometimes got when he hadn’t exerted himself enough that day and had to get more energy out. He wanted to go back to his team and play, so he was almost relieved that Kenma’s friend showed up to pick him up so Shoyou could spend more time running.

Kenma left him with a cryptic “see you soon” (so cool!) and Shoyou took off running in the opposite direction.

When he made it back to his team he was berated for running off and getting lost, but he didn’t mind in the least.

Before the practice match they received jerseys. Shoyou alternated between being grumpy that he got a higher number than Kageyama and gloating that he got a lower number than Kei, but neither of them seemed to care about the number across their chests.

“Don’t you remember that number?” Daichi asked.

Shoyou looked up at him, “Huh?”

“The Little Giant wore it when he went to Nationals.”

He held the shirt up to the light like it was suddenly something much more precious than it was before, and he already thought it was precious, “I met him y’know,” he said drawing the attention of a few other people, “Aki-nii, ah, that’s Kei’s brother, took us to Nationals that year and introduced us.”

“Your brother knew the Little Giant?” Tanaka asked loudly from across the room.

Kei ducked his head, it was still a bit of a sore topic for him, “They were on the same team,” he mumbled.

“Awesome! My sister was in Karasuno around then too.”

Shoyou shuffled towards Kei and bumped his arm as the topic shifted towards how many siblings everyone had, which is how they learned that Daichi had four younger siblings-- and suddenly his innate ability to corral the entire team made a lot more sense.

Shoyou was surprised to see Kenma walk in when Nekoma arrived. He couldn’t help but wander over to him and ask why didn’t say anything about being on their rival team, but Kenma just mumbled about how Shoyou never asked. He wanted to say something about how he didn’t even know he should have asked, and Kenma obviously knew who he was so he could have said something about it at any time, but Kenma suddenly looked up.

“Your teammate with the glasses is upset.”

“That’s just his face,” he said as he tried to wave Kei over. Kei turned his back to him.

“He doesn’t seem to like that you’re over here,” Kenma observed.

Shoyou shrugged, “He’s like that sometimes. I’ll go talk to him. But first,” he turned to Kenma and grinned, “We won’t lose.”

They lost.

They lost and Shoyou demanded they play again and they lost again. They lost the third game too. Nekoma was good. Playing against them was exciting and got his heart racing. But the worst part was that they got used to his quick attack and started catching up to it.

Having Inouka chase after him was exhilarating. After the match they bounced around together and talked about how cool it was, he could hear Kei scolding him for not using real words to describe how awesome it was but he didn’t care.

Captain Nekomata said they would meet at Nationals and Shoyou believed them. They were definitely going to meet on that big stage. They were going to fly higher and he was going to win. But first he had something to do.

He meant to go slip to Kei’s side but he accidentally bumped into Kageyama. Kageyama glanced down at him but then went back to looking at his hands, “If today was a real match,” he said, not checking to see if Shoyou was listening, “we’d be done. Out.”

Shoyou nodded. He didn’t need someone to tell him that, “We need to get better. We need to do more.”

He nodded at Kageyama again, their resolve set, and finally made his way to Kei. He grabbed one of Kei’s hands and held it with both of his, immediately drawing Kei’s attention.

“What’s up?” Kei asked quietly.

Shoyou looked at their hands, “We lost,” he looked over to where Kageyama was still looking at his hands, “what if I’m not good enough to stand on the court after all? Inuoka caught up to me.”

Kei snorted, “Is Hinata Shoyou doubting himself? I must be dreaming. You can’t tell me that you haven’t already promised to redouble your efforts. Nekoma was a cohesive team, we’re still figuring each other out.”

“Yeah, but--”

“Listen here Little Giant,” Kei cut him off, “just keep jumping and you’ll be fine.”

* * *

Kei and Shoyou were laying together reading a book for class, Kei at a substantially slower pace than he usually read, when the door opened and Akiteru’s head poked through.

“Aki!” Shoyou cheered, peeking under the book, “What are you doing back?”

He grinned at the two of them, “I’m just back for the night, I needed to get something from my room. What are you two doing?”

Kei held up the book, “Reading.”

“Together?”

Shoyou nodded, “It’s for class, we both need to read it, even though Kei,” he jabbed his friend in the side, “says I read slower than an elementary school student.”

“You do,” he said flatly, smacking him atop the head in retribution, “By the time you turn the page I’ve read it multiple times.”

Akiteru squinted at them, “Then why not read it separately? Or is this just a weird excuse to cuddle”

Shoyou sat up and stretched out his back, “Huh? We weren’t cuddling.”

“Oh, my bad,” Akiteru waved a hand in front of him, “It’s just that my girlfriend and I cuddle in the same way.”

Kei glared at him, “Do you need anything?”

“Yes,” he nodded seriously, “I want to talk to you later.”

The conversation was interrupted by a loud call of “Aki-nii” and Natsu barrelling into Akiteru as forcefully as she possibly could. Natsu tackled him fully into the room and Shoyou couldn’t help but burst out laughing. Kei shook his head and put a bookmark in the book, they weren’t getting any more reading done while Aki was around.

It had been a while since the four of them were together, and Akiteru apologized that he hadn’t been keeping in touch as well as he meant to, so he sat on the floor with Natsu in his lap and asked them all what they had been up to while he had been gone.

Natsu chatted happily about how she was doing in elementary school and all the friends she was making. She told Akiteru that the school work was easy and she was having fun playing volleyball still but serving was hard and she couldn’t always get the ball over the net like he could.

Akiteru laughed and told her that when he was small he couldn’t always get the ball over the net either so she just had to keep practicing.

Shoyou told him that Karasuno wasn’t as good as when he was on it, that they just got a coach and had their first training camp with Nekoma. He told him about Kageyama and Kenma and how cool Nishinoya was. Aki teased him about becoming a libero but Shoyou was adamant about being a spiker and positive they were going to make it to Nationals.

Kei said classes were fine.

Akiteru tried to get him to talk more about it but Kei shrugged him off, Aki said that he wanted to talk to him later so they could have a conversation then, he didn’t need to contribute now.

The rest of them talked more and let Kei quietly contemplate.

Later, Akiteru beckoned Kei into his room. Kei hadn’t been into Aki’s room in a while, there was no reason to go in it while he was at college and even before he left he didn’t go in it often. It was cleaner than he expected it to be, but that could have been their mother’s doing.

“You still share a bed with him,” was Akiteru’s big opener.

Kei scowled at him, “Is that what this is about?”

“Don’t leave,” Aki got between Kei and the door, “stay and talk with me. I don’t understand what you two are doing. You’re both teenagers. Don’t you want privacy?”

“I want privacy right now,” Kei grumbled as he sat heavily on Akiteru’s bed.

Akiteru sighed and ran a frustrated hand through his hair, “Look, I’m not going to talk to you about puberty again, that was the most awkward conversation I ever had, but sleeping with him has to be at least a little bit weird.”

Kei chose a spot on the wall to stare at because apparently he wasn’t getting out of the room, “We agreed if it got weird then we’d stop.”

“What happens if one of you gets a girlfriend?” Akiteru asked, changing tactics.

“What about it?”

Akiteru huffed, he couldn’t believe that he had to spell this out. He couldn’t believe that this had gone on for so long, “She won’t like that her boyfriend sleeps with--”

“--stop saying it like that!” Kei cut him off, “We’re not, we don’t…” his voice faded as he trailed off.

He paused and looked at his brother. Kei had his shoulders nearly up to his ears, tense and defensive, and Aki finally realized what was going on, “Oh. Kei,” he said lightly, “Kei do you like Shoyou?”

“He’s my best friend, of course I like him,” Kei scoffed, but it didn’t have his usual bite.

If Kei wanted him to spell it out, he would do it. “Kei, you know what I mean. Do you have a crush on Shoyou?” He watched his brother wind himself tighter and his ears turn red, “Hey, that’s fine! But sleeping-- sharing a bed with him is just going to hurt you in the long run if he starts dating.”

He slowly tried to unwind himself, taking deep breaths, “He doesn’t have time to date.”

Akiteru shook his head, “That’s not the takeaway here. It’s okay to like Shoyou, you said you were going to marry him when you were like five and you’ve always been consistent, but don’t put the two of you in an awkward situation if you can avoid it.”

Kei stood up and made his way towards the door, “I don’t know what I like,” he said tersely, “Can I go now?”

Aki let him pass, “At least think about it.”

Kei stormed out of Akiteru’s room and into his own room. He didn’t know why he was startled to see Shoyou there, but he was. Shoyou was reading the book they had been reading together earlier and for some reason that pissed him off too.

When Shoyou noticed his arrival he placed the book flat on his chest, “Oh, hey! I was reading ahead so when you came back we could go back and you couldn’t complain about how slow I am, but I didn’t get that far,” he smiled sheepishly.

Kei felt all of the fight drain out of him. He just wanted to collapse on the bed and go to sleep. He took off his glasses and laid on the bed face down next to Shoyou. Shoyou shifted so he was laying on his side and rubbed Kei’s back.

“Tough talk?”

Kei shrugged his shoulders and readjusted so he was looking at Shoyou, “Does sleeping next to me bother you yet?”

“Ah,” Shoyou nodded wisely, making Kei snort, “another puberty talk. No, it doesn’t bother me. I’ve heard you make noise in your sleep and you’ve probably heard me. Uh, sometimes we sleep closer together so I have felt you but,” Kei watched Shoyou turn redder the more he spoke, “and I usually take care of myself before I come over here so--”

“Okay,” Kei said, placing his palm against Shoyou’s face and pushing him away, “this conversation is bothering me.”

Shoyou chuckled nervously, “yeah, me too. Bodies are bodies but I like sleeping next to you.”

That night Kei hesitated before kissing him on the forehead but Shoyou rolled his eyes at him and called him a dummy.

Akiteru didn’t have to know about that.

* * *

＼(＾∀＾)メ(＾∀＾)ノ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was going to be their entire first year of high school but it was going to be monster if I kept it that way so I cut it in half. Hope you enjoyed.


	3. Chapter 3

＼(＾∀＾)メ(＾∀＾)ノ

* * *

Shoyou’s eyes flew open. It was Spring Inter-High day. It was the first big tournament of his high school career and he was up and ready to go.

Or, he would have been up and ready to go if Kei wasn’t asleep on his back.

Kei was pressed against his back, his head nuzzled between Shoyou’s shoulder blades. They didn’t usually touch that much while they slept but every once in a while one of them rolled over or got clingy. Sometimes he could crawl out from underneath him before things got uncomfortable for either of them but other times Kei was surprisingly heavy and he had to remain in place.

Shoyou squirmed but Kei was a dead weight. It was ridiculous. He knew that when he was conscious Kei wasn’t heavy, he was pretty confident that when they were both awake he could easily pick him up but while Kei was asleep all he could do was wiggle and try and get free. Which was annoying because it was tournament day and he wanted to get going!

He tried to get out again but Kei grunted and fisted his shirt to pull himself closer.

“Kei,” Shoyou hissed, “let me go.”

Kei sighed and Shoyou felt his breath against his back. He had to get out before Kei woke up and things got weird because as Kei pulled himself closer Shoyou could definitely Kei against his thigh and he had to hold back his own groan.

Shoyou grabbed the edge of the bed and pulled himself out before he landed with a thunk on the floor.

“Ow,” he said quietly to himself as he rubbed the back of his head.

Kei leaned over the edge of the bed and rubbed his eyes, “What are you doing on the floor?” he asked sleepily.

Shoyou hopped up, “Spring Inter-High today! C’mon” he grabbed Kei’s arm and shook it lightly, “we should get ready!”

He sat up and put on his glasses, “What time is it?” he looked around the room and noticed that it was still rather dark out and Shoyou was smiling sheepishly, “I’m gonna sleep more.” He laid back down.

Shoyou huffed but he left the room, Kei would get up eventually and they could get going. As he walked back to his own house he had to cover his mouth to stifle an excited squeal. It was tournament day!

He had never been so excited!

* * *

As his quick attack was blocked and the ball hit the floor on their side of the court for the last time, Shoyou felt his legs turn to jelly. The whistle blew signaling the end of the game and they lost. He vaguely heard Aoba Josai cheer as his legs finally gave out and he fell to the floor.

He looked behind him at the rest of his team, most of them had collapsed as well and were in various states of laying on the floor. He looked at them but could barely process who he was seeing. His ears rang as a shadow passed over him, he thought that it would be Kei or Kageyama but it was Daichi offering a hand.

“I’m sorry,” he said immediately.

But Daichi shook his head, “No, your quick attack wasn’t a mistake. You did well Hinata,” he looked across the net at Seijou who was still celebrating, “They just did better.” He slapped Shoyou on the back lightly, “C’mon, we have to line up.”

Daichi pulled him up and Shoyou was surprised at how unsteady his legs were but he managed to make his way to the line up. When he got to the line he grabbed Kei’s hand and squeezed so hard he knew that it had to hurt but Kei didn’t complain. He was grateful for that.

After they bowed and thanked their supporters Kei tried to keep Shoyou with him, probably for both of their sakes, but Shoyou managed to slip away. He quietly apologized to his friend and promised that he would make it up to him but he needed a moment to himself. He wanted to go outside and breathe. Usually he loved the smell of the court but he was suffocating and needed the fresh air.

He really thought they were going to win.

And he didn’t need Kageyama apologizing to him when he found him outside, apparently he also needed a breather. He didn’t need to feel like him being there was a mistake. He told Kageyama as such and would have kept yelling at him but Takeda-sensei showed up and talked some sense into them.

Shoyou made his way back to the stadium, he needed to pick up his things before they got back on the bus, but he saw Kei standing in a desolate corner with both of their bags. He slowly trudged over him, his head hung low.

“Dejected isn’t a good look on you,” Kei said after Shoyou bumped his head into his chest.

“Shut up, Kei,” he mumbled into Kei’s shirt as he fisted at the hem, “We lost, and--”

Kei ran a hand through Shoyou’s hair and lightly tipped his head back so he could kiss his forehead, “You did great,” he said quietly. Shoyou held back a sob, “C’mon, let’s go home.”

Kei tried to lead them towards the bus but Shoyou held him in place, “Give me a minute.”

“Yeah,” he leaned back against the wall and ran his fingers through Shoyou’s hair again and again as they tried to get over their loss.

After a few minutes had passed they headed back towards the bus. They weren’t the last ones to arrive, a few others had also split off into groups to try and process what just happened. The two of them grabbed seats and Shoyou maneuvered them so Kei’s arm was around his shoulders and he could hide his face in Kei’s chest. It was childish but he didn’t care.

Kei shifted underneath him and Shoyou wanted to complain but then headphones were placed over his ears. He looked up at Kei curiously but Kei just gave him a small nod before pressing play on a playlist he had full of Shoyou’s favorite music. He smiled at his friend and went back to leaning on him.

He was sure they made quite a picture-- Kei and his stoic features of someone waiting to mourn in private with his arm around a red faced and misty eyed Shoyou, someone who openly wore his emotions for everyone to see. They were opposites, but they kept each other together.

Shoyou knew he was really upset when Kei had to cajole him off the bus for food. He wanted to stay curled up and go home. But his stomach made itself known and he couldn’t stay on the bus while the whole team was eating, so followed at a much slower pace than usual.

In the restaurant he leaned heavily on Kei and it said something about the general atmosphere that no one participated in some light-hearted teasing.

Coach Ukai made a speech that made tears prick in his eyes again and he let them fall freely as he started to eat. After some cathartic crying from everyone but Kei, he heard Tanaka grumble about how cold hearted he must be to not care that he lost. Shoyou snuck a glance up at Kei and he wasn’t sure how he could think that he didn’t care.

Sure, Tanaka couldn’t feel how stiffly Kei was sitting, like if he let himself relax just a little bit he would fall apart, and he probably couldn’t recognize that Kei was eating much less than he usually did, a clear indicator that he was upset, but there were obvious bags under his eyes and even through his glasses Shoyou could see his eyes were red-rimmed.

He scooted a bit closer to Kei, he wanted to go home. Kei looked down at him when he noticed the action and moved some of the food from his already sparse plate to Shoyou’s much fuller one. Shoyou bit back a smile at how ridiculous the action was but ate the offered food anyway.

When they finally got home Kei turned to him and asked, “Are you going to cry?” Shoyou nodded and Kei let out a heavy sigh before saying, “Okay,” and digging through his drawers. Eventually he pulled out a worn Jurassic Park t-shirt that had a hole in one of the armpits and he usually only wore when he was cleaning.

“Okay,” he said again as he changed into the shirt, “you can cry now.”

Shoyou bit his lip and held back a laugh. That was so like Kei, to check and make sure so he could pick which shirt Shoyou cried on. The laugh escaped and he snorted at how funny it was, Kei looked confused which was even funnier and set off another round of laughter. But as his chest shook it quickly transformed to a sob.

Kei took his arm and led them to his bed. He guided Shoyou’s head to his chest and whispered, “You can cry now,” again he ran his fingers through his hair.

He didn’t need the permission but he burst into tears and sobbed until his nose ran and his throat hurt. More than once he had to stop and try and control his breathing so he could get enough oxygen and when he did that Kei switched to rubbing his back.

When he felt like he was all cried out he picked up his head and looked at Kei. He had tear tracks down the sides of his face. Shoyou reached out and wiped them away for him, “I didn’t notice you cry.”

“Okay.”

Shoyou scrunched up his nose, “How do you just breathe normally while crying? Are you a robot or something.”

He pushed his glasses up and wiped his eyes, “We’re not all as emotional as you.”

Shoyou opened his mouth and closed it again. He could feel tears well up again.

“Shut up,” Kei said even though he hadn’t said anything, “We’ll do better next time.”

* * *

Shoyou didn’t expect a lot to happen for his sixteenth birthday. His family was never big on birthdays, so maybe he should have known that something was up when he got out of bed and Kei immediately sat up with bleary eyes and messy hair mumbling about how he was up too and to not leave without him.

He watched as Kei slowly got dressed, fumbling on the buttons because his hands wouldn’t listen to what his brain wanted them to do, before they left the room to go over to his house so he could get dressed for the day as well.

He wasn’t expecting to see both of their mothers and Natsu in his kitchen getting a very early breakfast ready just for him. Shoyou smiled widely at them and said he’d be right back and raced to get dressed. They had time before he wanted to leave for Karasuno but he also wanted to spend as much time as possible at that table.

When he got back food was just being served. He took his spot next to Kei who was resting his forehead on the table, glasses neatly folded next to him.

“Happy birthday,” he mumbled when he felt Shoyou sit down next to him, “Can’t believe you’re older than me.”

Shoyou let out an offended squawk, “I’ve been older than you the entire time you’ve known me!”

“Mhm, and you’ve never looked it.”

He shoved Kei’s arm, “You’re not allowed to be mean to me on my birthday.”

Kei snorted, “You’re turning ten, right?”

“Hey!” he yelled, “Natsu’s ten! I’m sixteen!”

Kei covered his head with his arms, “Too loud. Natsu tell your dumb brother to stop.”

“Sho,” Natsu scolded, “stop being loud.”

Shoyou pretended to slump in his seat, “Everyone is being mean to me,” he sighed dramatically, “But at least there’s food.”

Their mothers laughed at their antics and piled Shoyou’s plate high with some of his favorite foods. He dug in heartily and thanked them practically every other bite. He was getting seconds when he realized that Kei still had his head on the table. At one point Natsu had tried to offer him something but he waved her off, saying it was too early to eat anything.

He poked Kei’s side and he turned his head to look at him. Shoyou wordlessly held up a piece of cut up fruit to Kei’s lips and he ate it out of his fingers before pressing his forehead back into the table.

At least he had one bite.

Shoyou was wiping his fingers on his pants when he realized that they were wet not only from the juice of the fruit but because of Kei’s saliva. He shoved food in his own mouth to try and hold back a blush. What an embarrassing thing to think about. Kei was just his best friend.

Eventually they were on their way to school and it seemed like Kei was stopping him from getting there as fast as possible, but again he didn’t think much of it because Kei was still acting drowsy and holding on to Shoyou’s hand for support.

So he was surprised yet again when they walked into the gym, still early for morning practice, and everyone was already there.

“Happy birthday!” they all cheered when he entered.

“Huh?” he looked around the room at all his teammates, “What?”

They laughed at his confusion and surrounded him to slap him on the back, ruffle his hair, or wish him happy birthday again. It was the best mood the team had been in since their defeat at the Spring Inter-High and Shoyou found that their mood was infectious and soon he was laughing and bouncing along with them.

He turned to Kei and asked “did you help plan this?”

“Hmm?” Kei said dismissively, “When would I have time to do that? We’re preparing for the Tokyo training camp.”

Shoyou smiled widely at him, “Thanks.”

He turned back to the group and Suga wrapped an arm around his shoulders, “My adorable kohai, we have a gift for you too. It’s not much, but it’s from all of us.” Then the team parted to reveal Daichi holding a volleyball, “We all signed it for you.”

Shoyou took the ball in his hands and admired all of his teammates signatures and their widely different handwriting.

Suga handed him a pen, “You should sign it too, then when we win Nationals it could be worth a lot of money!”

“I won’t let you down!”

* * *

They had a little bit of time before the Tokyo training camp started and that meant studying for exams and keeping up with their own training.

But they weren’t the only ones looking towards the future. Shimizu brought a tiny blonde girl around and said that she agreed to become their manager on a trial basis.

Yachi Hitoka, class 1-5, as she introduced herself, was smaller than Shoyou, extremely shy and jumpy, and Kei was pretty sure that she was not going to last a week. She seemed intimidated by the players and the ball and Shimizu and she was very unsure of herself. The exact opposite of their cool-headed manager.

Kei couldn’t understand why Yachi agreed to the trail run in the first place.

As Kei watched Yachi drop the same chair for the third time Yamaguchi came up to him and said, “She’s cute, huh?”

He looked at her. She kind of fumbled around like a baby animal and he knew that people thought those were cute, but he knew that Yamaguchi wasn’t looking at her in a nature documentary type of way but as a boy-looking-at-a-girl type of a way. He made a noncommittal noise that Yamaguchi thankfully took as confirmation.

But Shoyou popped up on his other side to say “Yeah, she is! I hope she becomes our manager. It’ll be so cool to have two managers.”

Yamaguchi laughed, “Do you remember that guy from Nekoma who was jealous we had a pretty female manager? Imagine if we show up with two.”

“I don’t understand,” Kageyama said. Kei turned around, he didn’t even hear the other boy approach them, “Will being pretty make her a better manager?”

“Hmm,” Yamaguchi put a hand to his chin as he seriously thought about the question. Kei was going to cut in and say no, obviously not, but Yamaguchi said, “Yes. Because boys want to impress pretty girls. So we’ll try to do better if she’s around.”

Kageyama looked over at Yachi, “Oh. Okay,” he sounded unconvinced.

Kei hated to agree with Kageyama on anything so he kept his opinion to himself.

Shoyou threw a volleyball at Kageyama and he caught it reflexively, “You don’t think she’s cute?”

“She’s just a girl. I never thought any of them were pretty” he shrugged, “I’m here to play volleyball, not look at girls.”

“Not even Shimizu?” Shoyou gaped.

When Kageyama shook his head no, Yamaguchi and Shoyou exchanged a look. “What about boys?” Yamaguchi asked with a forced casualness. Kageyama shook his head again. “That’s fine. We’re all here to play volleyball too.”

Kageyama looked confused as to why it wouldn’t be fine, unaware that he may have revealed something personal about himself, “Thank you? C’mon Hinata, I’ll toss to you!”

“Toss! Toss!” he cheered as he followed his partner away.

Kei watched them go and tried to ignore Yamaguchi looking at him but he could literally feel his eyes on him so he had to turn and snap “What?” at him to make him stop.

“What about you, Tsukki?” he asked carefully.

He bit back a sarcastic ‘what about me?’ because he knew what his friend was asking about. He took a second to look around the room, at how people had paired off to do their own training, he looked at their two managers, “Shimizu is pretty,” he said finally. It was true, objectively speaking, even if he didn’t care about it.

Yamaguchi nodded beside him, “She is.”

Kei walked towards the cart full of volleyballs and picked one up before Yamaguchi could ask the next question.

* * *

Practice was tiring but they couldn’t go home yet because Takeda-sensei had to make an announcement. His last announcement had been about letting them know they were invited to the Tokyo training camp, so the entire team was excited to hear what he had to say this time.

The entire team except Kei, who was simply hot and tired and wanted to go home.

Despite the July heat, and despite the fact he was already sweaty, he sat on the floor behind Shoyou and pulled the smaller boy to his chest, bracketing him between his legs, so he could rest his forehead on Shoyou’s shoulders. Shoyou didn’t stop talking while he was being manhandled into a suitable position for his best friend, but he did reach behind him and take Kei’s glasses so they wouldn’t get bent and hooked them on his shirt.

Even though they had been on the team for months and their closeness was common, people still occasionally did a double-take when they saw them in such an intimate position, but they tended to get over it. Kei chalked it up to his general aloofness with everyone else.

Only a few minutes passed before Takeda-sensei entered the gym, his staff meeting had run a bit longer than he expected. Kei lifted his head so he could at least look like he was paying attention and Shoyou passed back his glasses to better sell the act.

The announcement wasn’t anything special, just a reminder that they had exams coming up and if they wanted to go to Tokyo they needed to pass. Kei rolled his eyes at the reminder. Who would forget about exams, or think that they could fail and still go on a club trip?

The answer to that was at least three of his teammates.

Tanaka and Noya exploded into a panic while Kageyama seemed to enter a catatonic state. Kei watched amusedly as the second and third years tried to round up Tanaka and Noya but eventually they turned their attention on Shoyou who was laughing at his senpais actions while still sitting between Kei’s legs.

“What about you, Shoyou?” Noya asked loudly.

Shoyou seemed confused that the focus was shifted to him, “Huh? What about me?”

“Yeah,” Tanaka nodded, “You’re not an idiot like the rest of us?”

“Speak for yourself,” Ennoshita muttered darkly behind them.

Shoyou laughed, “I’m in class four. My grades are fine.”

Kageyama broke out of his stupor and whipped around to look at Shoyou, “You’re in class four?” he asked loudly.

“You’ve had lunch with me!” he leaned over Kei’s leg to yell in Kageyama’s face.

“I didn’t realize it was your classroom!” he yelled back, “I thought it was his!”

Kei scowled when Kageyama gestured to him, “It’s mine too. Who do you think helps keep his grades up.”

“Hey!” Shoyou swatted his arm lightly, “I do fine by myself.”

“Hinata, please help me study!” Kageyama bowed low as his shout for help filled the gym.

Unfortunately Shoyou agreed and somehow that resulted in the four first years plus Yachi (“she’s in class five, Kei, I’m going to ask her if she can help and then she’ll feel like she’s part of the team!”) in his bedroom studying because Shoyou’s was too small to hold all of them. He kind of hated his best friend at that moment.

Shoyou was actually a terrible teacher. He couldn’t explain how he did anything, he just felt things out until they seemed right. He was like Noya trying to teach them how to receive, with great advice like ‘just move your body behind the ball’ and other gems.

Kei was too impatient to help Kageyama. He could deal with Shoyou or Yamaguchi asking him a question because he knew, for the most part, they understood the basic concept of things, but he was fairly certain if he cracked Kageyama’s head open a volleyball would fall out instead of a brain. Kageyama barely read assignment directions and barreled right through, so most of the time he wasn’t even doing the right thing.

Kei refused to help him until he learned elementary school level study techniques.

“Natsu is smarter than him,” he complained to Shoyou after Kageyama stared at the same math problem for over five minutes.

“Who is Natsu?” Yachi asked shyly.

“My little sister, she’ll probably come in here eventually. She likes to have Kei look over her homework.”

Yachi was a godsend. She had the patience to deal with all of them, and once she stopped being frazzled and afraid, she seemed like she was in her element. Somehow she managed to get Kageyama to slow down and read the questions before he tried to answer them. She showed off her own notebooks and note taking techniques.

She was trying to walk through the steps of a math problem when Natsu let herself in.

“Kei-nii” she sang as she entered. She stopped in her tracks when she realized there were more than two people in the room, “there are a lot of people in your room.”

“You must be Natsu!” Yachi said excitedly. Kei mentally rolled his eyes, there was no reason for her to be that happy, “But wait. Are you Hinata’s sister or Tsukishima’s?”

Natsu smiled, “I’m Shoyou’s sister. We live next door. Who are you? And that guy?” She pointed towards Kageyama. She was already familiar with Yamaguchi.

After introductions were made Natsu and Kei settled themselves on Kei’s bed so they could go over her work and not interrupt everyone else. Natsu was still in elementary school so it didn’t take long for him to go through everything and say that it looked fine. They sat and watched the others work but he could tell that she was getting restless so he ruffled her hair and sent her on her way with a promise to play later.

“You’re a good brother,” Yachi smiled at him.

He grumbled “whatever” and stretched out on his bed. He wished that they would leave soon so he could have his space back but Shoyou probably wouldn’t let him kick them out, so he had to wait for this study session to be over. And he knew that this wasn’t going to be the only one, so they were going to be back in his bedroom at least one more time before exams.

He sighed. At the table he heard Shoyou chuckle.

A moment later Shoyou laid down next to him. “I know what you’re thinking,” he said quietly, hoping the others wouldn’t overhear.

“No you don’t,” Kei whispered back as he hooked his chin over the top of Shoyou’s head and awkwardly pulled him to his chest.

“You’re thinking about how you have to do this again.”

Kei licked his lips, “Shut up, Shoyou.”

“Are they dating?” they heard Yachi whisper to Yamaguchi, she wasn’t as quiet as she thought she was.

“No,” Yamaguchi said at full volume in a tone that suggested he was rolling his eyes. Kei didn’t know what Yamaguchi’s problem with them was. He got weird whenever someone asked if they were dating and Kei couldn’t understand why. “They’re just like that.”

Yachi seemed to accept that explanation at least and went back to trying to put anything besides volleyball in Kageyama’s head.

By the time exams came around, the five of them had met up three more times. Each time went a little better than the last but Kei wouldn’t categorize any of their study group meetups as good. At least not in the academic sense.

When they got their results back Kageyama had failed one of his tests by a slim margin and Kei felt a small amount of glee at the fact that meant he couldn’t come to the camp. But then Tanaka had to go and ruin the whole thing and promised to get him there late.

Kei sighed, it was going to be a long few days.

* * *

Shoyou grumpily sat on the bus and aggressively dug his head into Kei’s arm.

“Ow,” Kei said, pulling his arm away, “What’s your problem?”

“Coach is benching me until Kageyama gets there,” he crossed his arms and slumped down in his seat, “He told me to watch how everyone else plays but I must be useless without that quick attack.”

Kei dug through his bag for a headphone jack splitter and his spare pair of headphones, “You suck but not that bad,” he passed the spare pair over after he plugged it in, “There’s probably another reason. Now put these on and be quiet, I’m tired.”

“You’re the worst best friend,” he grumbled, but he put the headphones on and let Kei’s music drown out his feelings of inadequacy.

The feelings were harder to ignore when he was actually standing on the sidelines while the rest of his team played. He wanted to be able to stand on the court on his own merit, not simply ride on Kageyama’s coattails. He knew he wasn’t the worst player, but he couldn’t get better on his own if they didn’t let him.

Shoyou let his eyes wander around the gym. He was told to watch how everyone played, that didn’t mean only Karasuno, so he chose to watch Nekoma instead. He was fascinated with how Kenma got away with moving so little. But something else caught his eye, Inouka wasn’t on the court, instead was a very tall boy that he didn’t remember from last time.

He looked at a different team. Was height something he couldn’t compensate for? If even Inouka could be taken out for someone taller he didn’t stand a chance. Shoyou shook his head, he couldn’t afford to think that way, he had to keep moving forward.

When Kei rotated out he went and stood by Shoyou. He looked down at his friend’s determined face and asked, “You okay? You look like you’ve gone on a whole emotional journey.”

Shoyou snorted, “I’m going to get on the court.”

“Yeah,” Kei said, looking out over their teammates, “You will.”

Kageyama eventually arrived but by then the day was almost over. He surprised everyone by turning down some extra practice and instead went straight over to where Nekoma was mulling around to talk to Kenma and Inouka.

He hadn’t seen Kenma since their last match but they frequently texted so it was good to see him in person. Kenma gave him a small smile when he saw him approach but remained seated on the bench. Shoyou knew that he didn’t like exerting himself and was probably tired.

Inouka, on the other hand, had energy to spare and bounced over to greet him. Shoyou returned the greeting in kind.

Kenma led them to the dorms where they could talk and he could rest and the two of them followed eagerly, already catching up on how they had been since they last saw each other.

When they were in the room Shoyou asked Inouka why he was on the sidelines and he told him about Lev, their new tall player who was just learning the basics but had athleticism and height to make up for his lack of skill. Kenma didn’t seem to like him which made Shoyou feel a bit better about the whole situation. He wasn’t the one switched out for someone taller, but he could see it happen in the future if he couldn’t get better both on his own and as part of the team.

Shoyou thought it was weird that Inouka didn’t seem to mind as much. He would have burned up inside if he was removed as a starting player, he already felt that fire and this was just a practice camp.

They talked for a bit more until Kenma hummed and said, “Your friend is here,” without looking up from his game.

Shoyou saw Kei hovering by the door and realized that they were at a training camp again, that meant they were going to sleep next to each other. Kei hadn’t said anything, he barely let his presence be known, but he was subtly asking for some of Shoyou’s time before lights out was called.

He bid his Nekoma friends and good night and joined Kei, intertwining their fingers when they were out of the room. They walked slowly back to the room Karasuno was staying in, the voices of their teammates getting louder with every step. Shoyou dragged behind and Kei squeezed his hand, willing him to move forward again.

The room was loud but everyone ignored them when they entered. Shoyou wondered if they looked like they were in their own bubble. If they didn’t when they entered, they most likely did when Kei led them to a corner of the room, sat them down, and pulled Shoyou to his chest. He felt safe with his back to Kei’s chest and Kei’s legs protecting him on either side.

He let out a breath.

“What?” Kei asked, blunt as ever.

Shoyou looked at their teammates, “I want to stand on the court.”

“Then tomorrow,” Kei said seriously, “do it.”

Things go crashing down the next day, both literally and figuratively. He got so caught up in being on the court, and he wanted to advance to the next level so badly, that he collided with Asahi on a ball that was clearly meant for the ace and not him. As he laid on the floor looking up at his concerned wreck of a teammate, conflicting thoughts raced through his mind.

He was sorry, of course, so extremely sorry that he had done that. But he wanted that ball, he could have hit it. He needed to hit it.

Common sense won out though and the words that came out of his mouth were an apology. Over and over again he apologized to Asahi and Daichi and Coach and everyone else for interrupting the match that way. But he still knew that he wanted that ball.

* * *

Things crumbled further after he fought with Kageyama. They needed to make their quick attack better but no one would listen to him. He knew that Kageyama was a genius but that didn’t mean that his ideas weren’t worth listening to as well. When Kageyama, Suga, and Coach all dismissed his idea to hit the quick with his eyes open he felt the same burning he did when he was sidelined.

He needed to get better and no one was listening to him.

Coach told him to cool off and before he could get his water bottle Kei pressed it against the back of his neck. It was cold against his skin and made him jump at first, but then he leaned back against the sensation. It helped him focus on something other than how frustrated he was.

“I’m listening,” Kei said, prompting him to talk.

Shoyou looked up at him. Kei was still watching the court. If anyone was watching them, they wouldn’t be able to guess that Kei was consoling him, but Shoyou knew what this was, “No one’s listening,” he said, “they listen to Kageyama but not me. I want to hit it with my eyes open. I can do it.”

“I know you can,” Kei cut him off before he could pick up steam, “You get the King to toss to you all the time, you just need to practice it.”

“He won’t want to,” he tried to follow Kei’s gaze to see what he was looking at. Shoyou was fairly certain he was watching Nekoma play their last set, “I’ll have to demand it.”

“You’re annoyingly demanding,” Kei agreed.

Shoyou grabbed the bottle from the back of his neck and took a few long swigs, “Thanks.”

* * *

He fell asleep on the bus ride back to Karasuno but when they got back he told Kei to walk home without him, he needed to talk to Kageyama. All it took was one bold “Toss to me” to get Kageyama in the gym. Being annoyingly demanding seemed to work.

Yachi helped them practice but it didn’t matter because they failed again and again. The gym was littered with missed attempts and the air was heavy with their frustrations. But Shoyou kept calling out for another and Kageyama kept giving him one. He was tired and his legs burned but he still jumped with all his strength and swung like he believed he was going to hit the ball.

And missed.

After who knows how many attempts, Kageyama was done with him. He yelled at him that he was ruining the balance of the team by trying to do something new but the words barely penetrated Shoyou’s skull. The blood in his ears was too loud. He thought that Kageyama would understand that need to be better and do something new.

He tackled Kageyama. They were going to stay in the gym until they got it right and Shoyou was willing to fight him for it. He was always willing to fight to stay on the court.

Tanaka broke up the fight.

Shoyou didn’t even know that Tanaka was around. But he hit hard enough to knock him out of the state he was in. Yachi bandaged him up quietly and offered to walk him home but he declined her offer, he didn’t live that far from the school anyway and she didn’t need to go out of her way to make sure he didn’t stop somewhere and practice on his own, he really was going to go straight home.

He walked home with his hands shoved in his pockets. His face was still sore from where Tanaka hit him and it served as a reminder of what he still couldn’t do. He wanted to do more.

When he got home he wasn’t sure which house he should enter. He wasn’t sure where Kei would be or if he wanted to see him or not. Kei would surely react to his bandaged face and he wasn’t ready for it quite yet. He chose his own house even though there was a chance Kei would be there with Natsu.

He slipped in unnoticed and took a bath in relative peace. He heard Natsu and his mother talking, and his mother stopped by and checked up on him when she heard the water running, but there was no sign of Kei. It didn’t make him feel better.

After he scrubbed away the day he got into his favorite pajamas and told his mother he was going to see Kei. She looked worried but didn’t say anything.

Kei was laying in bed with his eyes closed and headphones on. Shoyou didn’t know if he was asleep but he did know that Kei didn’t hear him enter the room. His best friend looked so calm, so peaceful. Shoyou wondered if it was possible to steal some of that for himself.

He climbed into the bed and laid on top of him. Kei let out a small ‘oof’ at the unexpected weight and pushed his headphones off his ears. Shoyou didn’t usually lay on top of him like a dead weight, so it was safe to assume that something had happened and maybe he wanted to talk about it.

“So?” Kei asked.

Shoyou laughed at his best friend’s blunt way of asking how he was doing, “I can’t hit the ball.”

He felt Kei shrug, “Have you tried hitting Kageyama instead, it might make you feel better,” he half-joked.

Shoyou sighed and picked up his head to reveal the bandages, “Yeah,” he said sheepishly, “It didn’t help.”

“Shoyou!”

“I’m fine,” he put his head back down, “Tanaka stopped us from fighting more. I just need to try harder. But can you just…” he trailed off.

Kei nodded, “Yeah,” and wrapped his arms around him, “I’m here.”

Shoyou sighed again, more contended this time. He still felt the burn to do something but it was blocked out by the warmth of Kei’s arms.

* * *

When Kei woke up Shoyou was already gone. He had been gone for hours and then spent the entire day away even though they didn’t have a gym to practice in that day. Kei spent the day doing nothing, it was one of the rare days he could do so and he wanted to take advantage of that, but in the back of his mind he worried that Shoyou was off doing something reckless.

Later that night, Shoyou came back covered in sweat but smiling ear-to-ear like he had a major breakthrough. Kei didn’t even have to ask what happened before he launched into a story that culminated with him going to see the former coach Ukai and practicing at his house, and he planned on going back.

They had a few weeks before the next training camp with the Tokyo group and in that time Kei felt like he barely saw Shoyou at all. He got up far before him and went for a run and then he spent the day going between Karasuno’s practice (where Shoyou was going all out to an unbelievable degree) and the older Ukai’s house for extra practice. Kei felt burnt out just thinking about that schedule.

If they didn’t share a room together they would’ve practically never seen each other. Others even bothered to comment to Kei about it that Shoyou was extremely focused and not taking time to go see him during practice. Others being Yamaguchi, Suga, and Daichi-- who were some combination of annoyingly worried about him and rightfully, in his opinion, worried about Shoyou.

At the end of the day Shoyou collapsed into bed exhausted and curled into Kei’s side. He tried to ask Kei what he did that day but he was usually asleep before Kei could finish answering.

The few times he could stay awake, Kei would sit behind him and press his palms into Shoyou’s sore back and scold him for overdoing it. He tried to convince him to take a break, that his body needed a day off from all of his repetitive motion and strenuous exercise, but he kept going.

By the time they were going back to the Tokyo training camp, Kei liked volleyball a little less.

* * *

The training camp was intense. It seemed like everyone had been working on their own thing, striving to get better. They just needed to work on putting all of the pieces together and that was harder than it seemed.

Shoyou and Kageyama still couldn’t sync up, but they had to relearn each other. It had only been a few weeks but it was like they were different players. They didn’t know what to do with each other.

Still, they lost set after set and did penalty after penalty until it didn’t even feel like a punishment anymore but simply something one did after they played a set of volleyball.

The only one not doing better was Kei.

Shoyou saw Bokuto, one of the top five aces, ask Kei to come practice with him, and Kei refused without a second thought. He tried to ask his friend why he refused but Kei brushed him off and left, saying something about being tired and wanting to go to bed. But Shoyou was pretty sure he was lying.

Yamaguchi asked him if something was wrong between them but Shoyou just shrugged. He didn’t think anything was wrong, but he had been spending a lot of time focusing on volleyball in lieu of anything else.

“Tanaka said you two broke up,” Yamaguchi told him.

“We’re not dating,” he replied automatically.

Yamaguchi nodded, “I know that but think about the meaning. You’ve been acting a lot differently with your best friend. He probably feels neglected.”

Shoyou made a face, “Yeah, he can be like that. I should find him.”

“I think,” Yamaguchi cut him off, “I will instead.”

They stared at each other for a moment and Shoyou could see that his friend wasn’t going to back down, so he nodded and watched him go. He didn’t know what Yamaguchi wasn’t to talk to Kei about or why he chose now to do it, but he was glad that someone else was looking out for his best friend.

It must have worked because Yamaguchi came back reporting that Kei was now practicing with Bokuto. He wanted to ask what they talked about Yamaguchi’s closed off expression told him not to.

At night Kei was the last person to enter their room, he slipped in right before lights out and immediately laid face down on his stomach. Shoyou wanted to laugh at him and ask if he was tired from the practice but he didn’t want to possibly stop Kei from accepting an offer tomorrow. Instead, he waited for Kei to roll closer to him.

When Kei remained on his stomach, not asleep-- Shoyou could tell because Kei was making sure not to crush his glasses, he reached out and touched his arm. Shoyou felt him jump but Kei didn’t pull away.

After a few minutes Kei took off his glasses, shifted a little bit until he found Shoyou’s hand and tangled their fingers together lightly. They fell asleep.

The next day wasn’t any better. It was another day of missing and missing and penalties and penalties until Kageyama felt bad for him and gave him something he definitely could hit and Shoyou yelled at him for it.

The atmosphere around the team was tense, but they were at the camp to work out their kinks and they were determined to come together as a team before it all came to an end.

Kageyama refused to practice with him again that night but Shoyou wasn’t upset about it, he could see Kageyama running through things in his own head and could tell that he needed the time by himself to figure himself out, to find his next step.

So he was ecstatic when Kei invited him to blocking practice with both Fukurodani and Nekoma’s captains. Kei was so cool getting to practice with people like them so he was happy to be invited along as well.

Bokuto and Kuroo both made a big deal about his showing up, but not in a negative way, they were both high energy and Shoyou fed off of that energy as well. It felt nice to not worry about volleyball and to just enjoy it instead. Akaashi greeted him less enthusiastically but didn’t make him feel unwelcome.

They ran through some spiking and blocking drills until Lev showed up, claiming he was freed from his receiving practice, and they split into teams for 3-on-3 games. Shoyou had a lot more fun with the extra practice games than he did the games with his real team, but he only had a moment to feel bad about it before he got caught up listening to Kuroo explain a better blocking technique or Bokuto helped him with his spiking.

After many sets and an equal amount of winning and losing, Shoyou found himself sitting on the floor between Kei’s legs as the six of them took a small break. They answered the usual question of no, they were not dating, just best friends for a long time and it was easy to ignore the look Kuroo gave them because Bokuto asked Akaashi why they weren’t best friends like that and Akaashi immediately shut him down.

At least, it was easy to ignore the look until Kei’s hands found their way to his back and pushed at just the right spot to make him moan involuntarily. He dropped his head down because it felt good and Kei pushed there again eliciting another soft moan. For a moment he forgot that they weren’t in one of their bedrooms.

“Should we leave?” Kuroo snickered.

Shoyou’s head shot up and Kei’s hands froze on his back like he was caught doing something he shouldn’t, “No, Kei was just. We were just.”

“Stopping him from hurting himself,” Kei finished for him.

Kuroo grinned at him, “Sure.”

He felt his face turn red because he obviously knew what Kuroo was implying and if Shoyou let himself think about it for even a moment he knew that Kei massaging his back like that did leave him a bit turned on and that wasn’t appropriate for in the gym or at home.

He shook his head to rid himself of the thought, “We should go before we miss dinner!”

On their last day they finally get their new quick attack to work and it feels like everything they had been through, every fight and argument, had been worth it. The entire team was working together better than they had days prior.

They still lost way more than they won, but it took the sting out of losing.

The barbecue helped too.

He was finally in a good mood again. He ate his fill of meat and vegetables and rice and watermelon. He made sure Kei and Kenma ate an adequate amount of food. He bounced around and spoke to everyone he could. He pretended not to overhear Kuroo ask Daichi about him and Kei.

Overall, the trip was a success.

* * *

When Kei woke up Shoyou was there. Staring at him. Intently.

“What?” he mumbled into the pillow before rolling over, it was the weekend and they had no practice that day, so no matter what Shoyou wanted it was too early.

“It’s your birthday!” Shoyou said excitedly.

He pulled the blanket over his head. Shoyou was probably telling the truth, he vaguely remembered writing a date on one of his assignments recently that was close to his birthday, “Then let me sleep.”

Shoyou poked him, “But Natsu and I have something for you.”

He peeked his head out and sat up, “I’m doing this for Natsu, not you.”

Shoyou grinned at him and told him to come into the kitchen when he was ready. Kei took his time waking up, stretching, scrolling through his phone, going to the bathroom, getting dressed-- all to make Shoyou wait longer. It was a small payback for waking him up when he didn’t have to.

In the kitchen Shoyou was pacing and Natsu was watching him go. Kei stood in the doorway and decided to see how long it took his best friend to notice he was there but his plans were ruined by his mother coming up behind him and greeting him.

Kei was directed to a chair while Shoyou and Natsu babbled at him too quickly for him to understand. But moments after they stopped talking an entire strawberry shortcake was placed in front of him.

“We made it!” Natsu said.

“You said you didn’t want anything,” Shoyou smiled at him, “But I know this is your favorite.”

They ate cake for breakfast and played volleyball in the backyard until they were hungry again. While they were having their second helping of cake, it was his birthday and he could have cake for lunch too if he wanted, Akiteru showed up with a gift of his own.

“To help you win Nationals,” Aki said as he handed over the box.

Inside were sports glasses.

* * *

Before they could even think about Nationals they had to get past the qualifiers. Their earlier defeat to Aoba Johsai still rang in their minds and they went into the qualifiers with renewed determination.

It took four matches before they were across the net from Aoba Johsai again. With four more victories under their belts they were feeling more confident than ever. Of course they knew that Seijou had earned their spot there too, but for some reason Kei went into the match thinking they were going to win.

He didn’t believe in things like the power of positive thinking. He wasn’t sure if he believed in a higher power. But if there was a volleyball god then it was smiling down on them because they beat Seijou and this time it was them who fell to the floor defeated.

Karasuno cheered, high off of their victory. But they knew that their next opponent would be even harder.

Shiratorizawa didn’t disappoint.

They felt like monsters. Kei knew that this is what a Nationals level team looked like. When he looked back at Karasuno he could only hope that they gave off a similar kind of energy because they were going to give it their all to win.

He was going to give it his all.

And he did. He did the unthinkable and blocked Ushijima’s killer spike. He timed it perfectly, drove them to do what he wanted, and couldn’t help but yell in celebration when he was successful. Shoyou jumped on his back and cheered with him. He didn’t even care about how heavy he was, he only cared about how good the stinging in his palms felt.

His hands hurt from that block, but he squeezed them into a fist and pretended he could hold on to the feeling forever because somehow it was one of the best things he had ever felt.

Ushijima got his revenge, not purposefully, and Kei injured his hand. He had never been so upset at being taken out of a game before. He made an offhand comment about getting to rest but inside he was devastated. Shoyou tried to follow him off the court but Kei strictly told him to keep things under control until he got back. He was going to get back.

He did and they won and nothing could possibly feel as good as that.

* * *

Nothing could possibly feel as bad as this.

  
There were very few times in Kei’s life where he would say that Shoyou had embarrassed him. Sure, he thought Shoyou was embarrassing sometimes, but he never went out of his way to publicly embarrass him in particular, so he gave his best friend a good amount of leeway.

Shoyou showing up uninvited to the Shiratorizawa training camp made him want to rethink their entire friendship.

So he couldn’t help but explode on him.

He was foolish and stupid to follow him here just because he was upset that he wasn’t invited to a training camp. He was going to waste his time here instead of bettering himself with the team. And Kei wanted to tell him all of that and more but he just called him an idiot again and again until he heard someone comment that they were surprised that he could lose his cool.

He took a deep breath and calmed himself. He wasn’t in charge of whether Shoyou could stay or if he had to go. Of course he would love to have his best friend with him at this camp, but he didn’t want to be humiliated in the process.

Shoyou stuck around. As a ball boy. Kei groaned inwardly in frustration.

Kei was training with some of the best players around so he knew that he had to try and make something of it, but whenever he had a moment of downtime he found himself looking for Shoyou. Shoyou was always diligently doing his job as ball boy but he seemed to find his purpose there

Just as whenever Kei had a moment he tracked Shoyou, whenever Shoyou had a moment he tracked everyone else. Kei caught him mimicking other people’s forms and asking them questions. Kei scoffed quietly, Shoyou would manage to find a way to learn from this experience.

When practice was over Kei was staying the night at Shiratorizawa but Shoyou had to go back home.

“I’d try to get you in,” Kei said as he walked him outside, “But even though they have a lot of dorm rooms we’re all sleeping in the same room and someone will talk.”

“It’s fine,” Shoyou smiled, “I should go home anyway.”

“Okay, well…” his voice trailed off.

Shoyou gave him a tight hug, “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Kei tried to pretend he didn’t want to go with him.

The training camp was only a few days long but Kei would be lying if he said he didn’t get anything from it. Everyone who was invited had something he could learn from, or forced him to learn something, or had something he could take with him.

Kogane made him jump higher. Goshiki made him set better. Hyakuzawa made him consider his basics. Kunimi made him think about his timing.

If he could figure out how to use any of it back with Karasuno then he would be a better player, he could be someone who personally helped them move forward in Nationals rather than a tall body on the court.

Shoyou also seemed to learn a lot, but he was spending a lot of time mulling it over rather than regurgitating it all for Kei, which he actually appreciated.

They didn’t speak on the way home, both of them were too worn out from practice to really talk, and Kei thought that it was a testament to how hard Shoyou had been working that even he had remained quiet.

They even ate mostly in silence, but the more time that passed the more lively Shoyou became and the more annoyed Kei became with him. Shoyou may be his best friend but he really shouldn’t forgive him for embarrassing him.

When they got into Kei’s bedroom Kei pushed him onto the bed and climbed on top of him, digging his forearms harshly into his back. He was going to question him again about what he could have possibly been thinking, tell him that his actions could have gotten them both kicked out of the camp and that he needed to think things through every once in a while.

But he was short circuited by Shoyou moaning. Maybe Shoyou wasn’t the only one who needed to think things through. Because now that Kei was taking a second he could see how his actions could be construed as a bit… he couldn’t even bring himself to finish the thought.

Shoyou froze underneath him, “Get off of me, please,” he whispered, body growing tenser by the second.

And Kei still didn’t think through his actions because he pushed down harder, focused on the conversation he wanted to have and not his best friend that he very much had pinned to the bed. Shoyou whined and Kei finally finished that thought from earlier. His actions were definitely crossing the line into sexual and he was sure that both of their bodies were reacting to it.

He finally got off of him and Shoyou fled the room.

He wondered briefly what he was going to do but shook his head because he very much did not want to think about that. This is probably what Akiteru was trying to warn him about.

Before he could work himself up, in one way or another, he picked a book off the shelf at random and began reading it.

Kei was surprised when Shoyou came back, freshly showered, over an hour later. He had been fairly certain that he was going to have to figure out sleeping on his own.

Shoyou got in his bed, but they didn’t talk the rest of the night.

They didn’t talk about it the next morning and Kei tried not to act surprised when Shoyou took his hand after they left the house. There was no good way to explain ‘sorry I was surprised that you still want to touch me after I practically assaulted you last night and also I have a crush on you, sorry I’ve been withholding that information’.

* * *

When they got to the Karasuno gym they felt like a new team, reunited. They were ready for Nationals.

* * *

As it turned out, they were not completely ready for reality that was Nationals.

Kei partially blamed himself for what happened because if anyone knew that Shoyou was overworking himself, it was him. He had told Shoyou that he needed to rest more and that his body needed a break, but he didn’t listen. Kei cursed himself for not talking to Daichi or Coach Ukai about it because maybe they could have knocked some sense into his idiot friend.

But they lost partially because Shoyou had an insatiable drive and Kei didn’t speak up to try and stop him.

The night of their National’s loss the inn they were staying at went all out with the food they served them. It seemed like both a pat on the back for getting so far and a consolation for their run ending. Kei put more on his plate than he usually did and intended to eat all of it. He was finally going to take Coach Ukai’s talks about food seriously.

The mood at the table was somber, broken only by Shoyou’s quiet coughs coming from the next room. At the beginning of the meal Coach had collected a tray of food for Shoyou and brought it to him so he could pretend that he was eating along with the rest of them.

From where Kei was sitting he could just about see the door to Shoyou’s room, and after every few bites he glanced up at it to… make sure it was still there? Make sure Shoyou was okay? He wasn’t sure, but he kept looking at it like maybe it would offer an answer or a lifeline.

The lifeline actually came in the form of Takeda-sensei who pulled him aside after Kei excused himself from the meal. Takeda-sensei said that he knew the two of them were close, and usually he wouldn’t allow it, but if Kei wanted he could go see Shoyou for a few minutes. Kei tried not to seem too eager but he did quickly agree to the offer.

Takeda-sensei said that they could have a few minutes, but no longer because he didn’t want Kei getting sick as well. Kei didn’t know how to tell him that any time one of them got sick the other usually did as well, so he simply agreed to the terms.

He slipped into Shoyou’s room while the rest of their teammates were mulling around elsewhere in the inn. Shoyou was laid out on a futon with a blanket wrapped around him, the food he was given earlier only went half-eaten. Kei made his way across the room and tugged lightly at the blanket until he felt it give a little and he was able to curl up beside him.

He must have jostled Shoyou when he put his arm around his middle because Shoyou blinked sleepily and asked, “Kei? Are we home?”

Kei shook his head, “No, we’re still in Tokyo,” he whispered back.

Shoyou wiggled a bit so he was pressed against Kei, “I wanna go home.”

“Soon,” Kei promised as he held him tighter.

“Kei?” Shoyou said again, quieter this time, “I’m sorry.” He rolled over so he could press his face to Kei’s collar, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault,” Kei whispered again as he pressed his lips to the top of his head. Shoyou was sweaty but he didn’t care, “you just need to take care of yourself.”

Shoyou tilted his head up and Kei kissed his forehead. He was warm. Shoyou sighed as his eyes fluttered closed, he was having a difficult time staying awake, “stay with me?”

He nodded, “As long as you need.” Kei knew that Takeda-sensei would come get him soon, and he probably didn’t want to get caught in this position, but in that moment he didn’t care about doing anything other than fulfilling Shoyou’s request. And Shoyou was stupid to think that Kei would want to do anything other than stay with him.

He kissed his forehead again and watched as Shoyou’s breathing became even and his grip slackened. It didn’t take long for him to fall asleep, and even Kei getting out of bed (he did decide that he didn’t want to get either of them in trouble) barely woke him. He knew that he had a little bit of time left so he spent it running his fingers through his hair, ignoring the gross sweaty feeling and instead admiring how it relaxed his already sleeping friend.

And right before he chose to leave, Kei leaned down and kissed him, softly, and whispered, “I’m sorry.”

* * *

＼(＾∀＾)メ(＾∀＾)ノ


	4. Chapter 4

＼(＾∀＾)メ(＾∀＾)ノ

* * *

On the bus ride back from Nationals Takeda-sensei wouldn’t let Kei or anyone else sit next to Shoyou. Kei saw his shoulders slump when he was forced to sit by himself for the long ride but he fell asleep almost as soon as the bus started moving.

Kei sat next to Yamaguchi and he knew that his friend wanted to talk to him, and he knew what he wanted to talk about, but he put on his headphones to stave off the conversation for a little bit longer. They had already spoken about it during the Tokyo training camp, they didn’t need to bring it up again on a bus full of their teammates.

He gave Yamaguchi a hard look trying to convey as much and he seemed to understand.

The ride was quiet but it wasn’t because they were all asleep like past tournaments. They had mostly gotten a good night’s rest the night before and now they had time to stew in their loss. When they got back home would really be the time where everyone went over every last play and wondered what they could have done better or how they could have helped, but they couldn’t get on the bus with their sick teammate and be in jovial moods.

Kei used that quiet to silently panic. He had been stupid, so stupid, and his stupidity didn’t start last night, it started the minute he kissed Shoyou on the forehead and tried to play it off like it was a normal thing for them to do. His stupidity started the second he decided to disregard Akiteru’s talk about puberty because he thought that it was embarrassing.

He never should have let himself go so far. He should have tried to rid himself of his crush, or he should have decided to live a normal teenaged life and sleep in his own bed by himself. How hard could it possibly be?

But he crossed a line when he kissed Shoyou. He crossed the line irrevocably when he looked over at his best friend and wanted to do it again (preferably while he was awake and participating).

He meant to groan inwardly but he must have made a noise because Yamaguchi mindlessly patted his arm. Now wasn’t the time to be thinking about such things.

For the first half of the ride the atmosphere was tense, like everyone was afraid of speaking. But eventually Tanaka and Noya started bickering about something inconsequential and it was like the tension burst. Suga laughed at them and egged them on, Asahi tried to get them to stop.

They needed that break.

The second half of the ride didn’t make Kei feel much better though.

It was late afternoon when they arrived back at Karasuno. School was out so there was no one there to see them come back from their defeat, which was a small blessing.

Kei was surprised to see Akiteru waiting for them, he had followed the bus home in his car so he could take them home. In retrospect it was very much an Akiteru thing to do. But before they could go he needed to get permission to take Shoyou home as well.

Shoyou’s mother wasn’t there to pick him up because Akiteru had called her and told her that he would bring him home, but Takeda-sensei still had to go through the proper channels and call Shoyou’s mother so the school had permission to release her son to Akiteru. (Kei thought that was stupid, Aki was one of Shoyou’s emergency contacts, right after both of their mothers.)

After Takeda-sensei made an unnecessary phone call they helped Shoyou off the bus where he was still dozing and loaded him into the back of Akiteru’s car. They didn’t live far from the school, Kei could have walked most of the way home in the time it took to sort everything out, so the drive home was quick.

Kei and Aki helped Shoyou into his house where his mother began to fuss over her sick son. Shoyou tried to protest but he fell asleep as soon as he was in his bed.

Kei grabbed Akiteru’s sleeve as he was leaving, “Can I talk to you?”

Aki looked him straight in the eye like he was trying to figure out what Kei wanted from his facial expression alone, and Kei wasn’t sure what he got but Aki nodded and led them next door to their own house and directly into Akiteru’s bedroom.

“What happened?” Akiteru wasted no time asking.

Kei collapsed on Aki’s bed and threw an arm over his eyes, not worrying about his glasses getting bent, “I kissed Shoyou,” he mumbled.

Akiteru sat down next to him, “So you’re going out now?” he asked hesitantly. He could obviously see that Kei didn’t exactly seem happy about the situation but he had to ask anyway.

“No,” he moved his arm to look up at his brother but he couldn’t keep his gaze and looked at the ceiling instead, “he was asleep.”

“Kei,” he scolded, “you can’t do that!”

“I know,” he groaned.

He put a hand on Kei’s arm, “What are you doing, Kei?

He rolled over onto his side so he could pretend that Akiteru wasn’t looking at him with that concerned expression of his, “I really like him,” he said into his arms, “I know I’m doing everything wrong.”

Akiteru sighed, “Then why don’t you try doing it the right way?”

* * *

It took Shoyou a few days to get better and a few more days to get back up to full strength. He was scolded by just about everyone for overtraining and not looking out for himself, and almost all of those people then apologized to him for not looking out for him and noticing that he was hurting. His cheeks burned, with embarrassment not fever, as he listened to all these people he respected say they should have been looking out for him better.

It made him feel worse. He was only trying to get better, but Coach Ukai and Takeda-sensei sat him down and told him there were different ways to better himself. So he made a plan to try and figure out what the best diet and exercise plan was for him and what he wanted to do.

The weird thing was that Kei was avoiding him. Or at least it seemed like Kei was avoiding him.

He barely saw Kei while he was sick, which was weird because whenever one of them was sick in the past the other usually stayed close by. But even his mother said that she hadn’t seen him around much since he dropped him off at home so he knew that something had to be wrong.

When he let himself into Kei’s room, Kei seemed surprised to see him, like he forgot that his best friend walking into his room was a daily occurrence and something to be expected. Shoyou frowned at him and quietly took note that Kei was reading the same book he always did when he was upset.

Shoyou got on the bed and laid down next to him. Kei scooted over so they weren’t touching. The action was so foreign, so opposite of what he expected from Kei, that Shoyou didn’t know how to react. Maybe Kei thought he was germy? But usually Kei wouldn’t hesitate to tell him not to get his germs on his bed. Something was definitely wrong.

“Did I do something?” he asked carefully.

It was subtle, but he saw Kei flinch, “No,” he said, focusing hard on his book, but Shoyou could tell from his expression that he wasn’t reading anymore, “No, you didn’t do anything.”

He couldn’t understand why he was so tense, “What’s wrong, Kei?”

Kei turned the page, “I’m upset about Nationals.”

Shoyou knew he was lying but didn’t know why. He considered pushing the issue but he knew that pushing Kei to talk was never the right answer, he opened up on his own time, “Okay,” he nodded, “Can I sleep here tonight?”

Kei closed his eyes and took a deep breath, “Yeah.”

* * *

A weird thing happened when they got back from Nationals. For some reason Shoyou was suddenly popular with girls. His natural charm, charisma, and outgoingness finally seemed to be noticed now that he had been on television and his full athletic ability had been on display.

Kei also had a boost in popularity but he did not have the personality to back it up. When a group of giggling girls tried to talk to him he blankly asked what they wanted with him and then told them he wasn’t interested in talking to them. His spike in popularity was short lived. (Although, according to Shoyou and Yamaguchi, girls had already liked him because he was attractive, tall, and smart, but he had never noticed.)

Shoyou always shined under any amount of attention, so he was happy that all of these people were interested in him.

He liked the girls that didn’t seem to get bored or annoyed when he talked incessantly about volleyball or what the team was working on. Anyone who was interested in hearing more about how they were trying to better their serves was a good person in his book. He really liked the few that asked questions and tried to learn more.

Three of them-- Yokota Mari, Okada Toshiko, and Maki Reiko-- tried to watch the team practice but they distracted Tanaka and Nishinoya enough that Coach had to ask them to leave or wait elsewhere. There was a small amount of grumbling that Yachi got to stay but he firmly told them that she was part of the club and that seemed to scare them off.

But they came back the next day during lunch and asked Shoyou if he wanted to have lunch with them and he invited the girls to join them.

Kei excused himself after a few minutes and Yamaguchi joined him moments later but Shoyou was busy being the center of attention that he didn’t notice until he said, “right, Kei?” and saw that they were gone. Kageyama snorted and said that they had left at least ten minutes ago.

He tried to talk to Kei about it later but his friend waved it off, saying that him and Yamaguchi were talking about their serve and block combo but Shoyou could tell that he was lying again. He wanted to push again and ask more but he still didn’t think that it was the right time, so he accepted the answer he was given.

He held Kei’s hand extra tight on the way home and tried to ignore the way his chest tightened when he noticed how quickly Kei tried to get away from him when they got home.

Something was wrong, but he didn’t know what.

He wanted to find out what was bothering Kei, he did, but then Valentine’s Day happened.

Realistically Shoyou should have known that Valentine’s Day was coming. Everything around him was getting a bit pinker and had a bit more hearts, the girls giggled a bit more. But like usual he was too caught up in trying to figure out what being better meant, and what was going on with Kei, to notice the change.

So he was blindsided when he got to his shoe locker after morning practice and there were chocolates in it.

“Gross,” Kei said from behind him, “who would want to give you chocolates.”

“I. I don’t know,” he said, stunned, as he picked up one of the neatly wrapped packages.

“What are you guys waiting for?” Yamaguchi asked as he rounded the rows of lockers. He stopped when he saw Shoyou holding a cute red box and opened his mouth to say something but snapped it shut. Shoyou saw him glance at Kei and he wondered if Yamaguchi knew why he was acting weird. “Tsukki, look over my English homework?”

Kei let Yamaguchi pull him away as he muttered a soft, “Yeah.”

Shoyou growled into his locker. He didn’t understand what was going on! He tossed everything into his bag without looking at it, he’d go through it later and try to convince Kei to share the chocolate with him because he knew that Kei liked sweets much more than he did.

Both Kei and Yamaguchi were quiet during lunch so Shoyou talked with Kageyama and Yachi. Yachi had given them all a small gift during morning practice and then had a small anxiety spiral about if it was too much, or not enough, so he and Kageyama were trying to tell her that her gift was great to mixed success.

About halfway through lunch, when Yachi had finally decided that her gift was acceptable and she didn’t have to worry, the five of them were approached by Maki. It was unusual to see her without the other two girls and Shoyou told her as much.

She blushed and Shoyou was confused because he didn’t say anything to embarrass her.

He didn’t know what was going on until she asked to talk to him.

It was sort of like everyone froze. No one could believe what they were hearing. Shoyou laughed awkwardly and agreed to talk to her.

Maki only led him to the end of the hallway before she held out handmade chocolate and said, “I like you!” a touch too loudly.

Shoyou took the chocolates, “Oh,” he was a bit embarrassed to admit that he didn’t think about dating all that much, not that he didn’t want to date anyone, “I--”

But she cut him off, “Let me know on White Day. I think other girls will confess to you and I want to win.” Her eyes sparkled at the competition and he found that he liked that.

When he returned to the classroom Kei and Yamaguchi were gone.

* * *

For the next month he tried to figure out what was wrong with Kei and he managed to piece together a few things.

1\. It started at/around Nationals  
2\. Kei definitely was pulling away from him  
3\. Yamaguchi knew why

He had two options. Ask Kei outright what was going on or ask Yamaguchi. And considering Kei had been avoiding giving him straight answers for a while now, Yamaguchi seemed like his best choice.

So one day after morning practice he cornered Yamaguchi in the storage room and asked, “Why is Kei avoiding me?”

Yamaguchi jumped, not expecting to be called out in such a manner but he cleared his throat and recomposed himself, “He’s not. You helped him stretch like usual, the two of you are talking.”

“But we’re not talking,” he stressed the last word, “Not really. I know Kei and I know something is wrong. Why won’t he tell me?”

“I don’t know what’s wrong,” Yamaguchi looked away.

Shoyou crossed his arm and stopped himself from stomping his foot like a toddler throwing a tantrum, “Why are both of you lying to me? I’m not an idiot.”

He rubbed his eyes, “You should talk to Tsukki about it, you know I can’t tell you.”

“Can you tell me if he’s okay?” Shoyou sighed, feeling defeated.

Yamaguchi offered him a small smile, “He’s hurting. But that’s all I’m going to say so don’t ask anymore.”

Since he got everything he could out of Yamaguchi, he had to turn to Kei.

Kei was extremely closed off while they were at school, so it had to be while they were at home. He needed to do something to get their closeness back because he missed his best friend. Kei even kept going to bed early so they couldn’t talk at night. He just needed to work around the weirdness.

Shoyou started small. He sat a bit closer to him while they ate and revelled at the fact Kei didn’t pull away.

Then he tried to hold his hand more. It was a bit tricky because they were often doing things that required the use of their hands, like eating or writing, so Shoyou tried to sit on his left side when he could and hold his free hand.

At first Kei was a bit bothered by it but after a few days he began to seek out Shoyou’s hand when they were home together.

His big move to get closer to Kei again was to ask if Kei wanted to read with him. He had bought a sci-fi book that he was fairly certain Kei hadn’t read before and even though he generally wasn’t interested in such things, he wanted them to read it together.

He was ecstatic when Kei agreed. Shoyou flopped down on the bed next to him and rested his head on Kei’s chest so Kei could hold the book above them. They both relaxed into the contact and Shoyou didn’t comment when Kei took a moment to lean in his hair, just as Kei didn’t comment when Shoyou practically nuzzled his collar.

“It’s going to take forever to read this,” Kei said into Shoyou’s hair, “you read so slowly.”

“Then read it to me.”

Kei hesitated for a moment but opened the book and began reading it outloud. Shoyou didn’t actually think he would do it but he was glad that he did. He closed his eyes and let himself listen to Kei’s voice.

* * *

He should have known that once he thought that things were okay with Kei that everything would turn upside down again.

Just like Valentine’s Day, White Day snuck up on him.

He had no idea it was White Day until Tanaka brought it up in the club room, roughly slapping his back and asking if he was going to accept Maki’s confession. Shoyou stumbled over the force of the slap and hit the floor.

Truth was, he hadn’t really thought about it since Valentine’s Day. Maki had been keeping her distance until he gave her an answer and he had been too concerned with trying to figure out what was wrong with Kei. But now things were good with his best friend again and he had mere hours to figure out if he was going to accept her confession.

He was off throughout morning practice, missing more balls than usual and not jumping as high, to the ire of Kageyama. But he was busy thinking things over as fast as possible. Maki was nice and pretty and they made each other laugh and she liked when he talked about volleyball. He couldn’t think of a good reason to reject her.

Shoyou wasn’t sure if he had a crush on her but feelings like that could grow. He never really paid attention to his feelings before so he could go out with her and see if feelings happened. That’s what dating was for, right?

But he didn’t even have a gift for her!

He considered trying to scrounge around for a gift for her at the last second but decided no gift would be better than something he could find in the volleyball club room.

And during lunch he split from Kei and the others to accept her confession.

* * *

Kei was halfway through getting changed for practice when Noya burst in through the door. He barely looked up because that was his usual way of entering a room and he acclimated to it months ago. What did catch his attention, though, was what he was yelling.

“I heard Shoyou got a girlfriend!”

Everyone in the room turned to him. He put his shirt on.

“What?” Did they want confirmation? Because he heard the rumor but Shoyou hadn’t stopped and talked to him long enough to confirm it.

Ennoshita took a careful step forward, “We really thought that the two of you were dating, even if you always denied it.”

Kei looked around the room at the rest of his teammates who were nodding along slightly. He didn’t know how to feel about that. Of course he knew that the two of them acted rather intimately and he knew that he had a crush on Shoyou but he didn’t realize that everyone thought they were lying when they said they weren’t dating. He quickly looked at Yamaguchi who offered him a small smile. Kei lowered his eyes at him, he definitely knew what the rest of the team thought.

“I thought you were worried about coming out!” Noya said loudly, “But you shouldn’t worry about that because I’m bisexual.”

Shoyou chose that moment to make his entrance. He looked between Noya and the rest of the room, confused about his declaration, but smiled and said, “Oh, sweet, me too.”

Noya turned and jumped on Shoyou so he could roughly rub his hair, “Oh yeah? Does your girlfriend know that?”

Shoyou blushed a deep red and that was all the confirmation Kei needed that they were actually dating.

“Are you sure you’re not dating Tsukishima?” Tanaka asked suspiciously.

He shook his head, “I wouldn’t cheat on Maki,” he paused and brought a finger to his lips, “Or, I guess I wouldn’t cheat on Kei? I also wouldn’t do that. Argh you’ve got me all confused! We’re just best friends and no one is cheating on anyone.”

While Tanaka and Noya cooed over Shoyou being a loyal boyfriend, Kei slipped out of the room with Yamaguchi. They slowly made their way towards the gym. Kei could see the furtive glances Yamaguchi was giving him and wanted to ignore them, but enough was enough.

“What?” he asked a bit too harshly.

“Are you okay?” Yamaguchi asked gently.

Kei stopped walking, “I’m fine, he doesn’t belong to me.”

Yamaguchi sighed, “I told you back at the training camp that you should ask him out.”

“Just stop, Yamaguchi, everything is fine.”

During afternoon practice Shoyou was back on his game and the others accredited that to him getting a girlfriend. Tanaka laughed that he was trying to impress someone who wasn’t here and Kageyama scoffed saying it was a dumb reason to be good at volleyball but at least it was working.

Kei walked home by himself because Shoyou stayed late with Kageyama to make up for their disastrous morning practice. He tried not to think about how things were going to change between the two of them. No girlfriend would like that her boyfriend regularly held hands with someone else, and she absolutely wouldn’t like that her boyfriend regularly slept in the same bed as someone else. This was definitely going to change their relationship.

He kicked a loose rock. Stupid Shoyou.

At home he tried to get through his homework but found that he couldn’t concentrate on the words so instead he sought out Natsu and they practiced volleyball in the backyard until dinner time.

Shoyou ran into the house as they were all sitting down to eat and quickly bathed and joined them. Surprisingly he didn’t tell anyone about his new girlfriend. Kei looked at him curiously but didn’t say anything about it either. He didn’t know if Shoyou was intentionally keeping it a secret or if he didn’t think that it was news to share, but either way it wasn’t his place to say anything and anything he did say would most likely come out as bitter.

After dinner Shoyou pulled out his homework and Kei decided to make another attempt as his. They worked through their assignments together and Kei pretended that having Shoyou pressed against his side didn’t make his skin burn.

Shoyou was stupid, accepting the confession of a girl he had only known for a little while, Kei thought as they laid down next to each other to go to sleep. He was going to tell him as much, going to tell him that his girlfriend wouldn’t like what he was doing right now.

But instead, Kei was stupid too.

He slowly reached out and wrapped his fingers around the back of Shoyou’s neck to pull him closer. The small hairs at the base of his neck tickled Kei’s fingers and he had to stop himself from tangling into them. Shoyou didn’t fight him as Kei pulled them closer together.

Softly, so very softly, he pressed his lips to Shoyou’s.

“Good night,” he whispered before turning around and bringing the blanket up to his shoulder. He prayed that Shoyou didn’t say anything.

* * *

Oh.

Huh.

Shoyou laid on his back and touched his lips. That was. Huh.

His mind was blank. Unable to form a cohesive thought.

He looked at Kei’s back and wanted to reach out but everything about the lump next to him said ‘do not touch’ and even in his stupified state he knew it wasn’t a good idea.

Shoyou licked his lips. They didn’t taste like anything. He didn’t know why he thought that maybe they would.

He would need to think about this more in the morning.

* * *

It was officially the start of their second year of high school and Shoyou didn’t know how to feel.

On the one hand, there were new players on the volleyball team and one of them even called him senpai on the first day (even though the first year was already taller than he was). But at the same time, that meant Daichi, Suga, and Asahi were gone for good.

And then there was the fact that he had a very nice and pretty girlfriend that he did like because she was cute and funny. But then there was also Kei who kissed him, and Shoyou hadn’t dealt with that yet either by himself or with Kei.

And classes were going to get harder but at least he still had Kei to help him but what if he somehow ruined the relationship because of the kissing thing and then he didn’t have Kei’s help and he failed out of school?

First year was so much easier.

He had to sort out some of his feelings for Kei. Because if he figured out what was going on with him and Kei then everything else should be easy.

So this is what he knew.

1\. Kei was his best friend and they have been together for most of their lives to the point where people thought that it was weird  
2\. He liked being physically close to Kei, holding his hand, sleeping next to him, leaning on him  
2a. Kei liked being physically close to him and was often jealous of others  
3\. Kei massaging his back tends to turn him on, but he doesn’t know if that’s Kei, the massage, or both  
4\. He’s had the occasional weird dream about Kei, but he’s a boy going through puberty and it doesn’t have to mean anything  
5\. Both he and Kei have woken up suggestively pressed against each other and it has felt nice, but again, puberty  
6\. He had never really thought about kissing Kei but now that he has, he would like to try it again to see how he feels

Shoyou stared at his list. The conclusion that he maybe wanted to kiss Kei again didn’t actually make him feel better.

He squeezed Kei’s hand as they walked to school and Kei looked down to smile at him. Shoyou smiled back and felt his chest tighten.

Oh. Huh.

When they approached the school gate Shoyou saw Maki waiting for him. He felt Kei tense next to him and tried to let go of his hand but Shoyou held on. Kei was still his best friend and Maki had to understand that if they were going to date.

Maki looked at them oddly but greeted Shoyou with a kiss on the cheek. They blushed at each other as they said good morning and Kei walked away without him. Shoyou didn’t like to see him go.

Feelings were complicated.

“Shoyou,” Maki said shyly, “Why were you and Tsukishima holding hands?”

“Huh?” he looked between her and Kei’s back, “We always do that. I thought everyone knew that.”

She folded her hands in front of her skirt and it reminded him of how Kei stood when he was uncomfortable, “Well now that you’re dating me, maybe you should only hold hands with me.”

“Huh?” he said again. The idea that he would have to stop holding hands with Kei had never crossed his mind. Which was silly in retrospect, he should have known that when you were dating someone they would want to be the only person whose hand you held. But Kei also seemed like the type of person who would only want the two of them to hold hands. He was so confused.

Shoyou rubbed the back of his neck, “Yeah, that makes sense.”

She smiled at him, “Good! Can I walk you to practice then?”

“Practice!” he yelled, “I’m going to be late!”

He grabbed her hand and ran towards the club room so he could get changed. He dropped her hand at the stairs and said a quick goodbye so he wouldn’t be too late. He tried not to think about how different her hand felt in his.

During lunch Maki came into his classroom and asked if he wanted to eat lunch together outside, he looked between her and his friends and with Yachi’s encouragement he agreed to go with her. He didn’t like leaving the four of them behind but if he was going to be a good boyfriend then he should at least eat lunch with her.

Outside Maki presented him with a homemade lunchbox and blushed a pretty pink, “Can I call you Shoyou?” she asked, embarrassment clear in her voice, “You can call me Rei.”

He nodded, “Yeah. Yeah, that makes sense. Because we’re dating. Rei.” he tried her name out and she blushed harder. It was cute.

“Shoyou,” she smiled. He didn’t feel embarrassed by the use of his name but he figured that it must be more of a girl thing, “I made this for you. I hope you like it.”

The meal was delicious. Kei’s refusal to meet his eye once he got back to the classroom was not.

Rei didn’t wait for him after practice because it went on for too long, but Kei stuck around longer than usual waiting for him to go home. When they reached the gates of the school together Kei tried to take his hand but Shoyou pulled away.

“Rei, um, Maki,” he stuttered, “said that we shouldn’t because we’re dating now.”

Kei looked at him blankly, “Oh.”

Even though there was no emotion behind his single utterance, Shoyou could hear how hurt his best friend was. He felt terrible, like he was choosing a girl over Kei. But it had to happen eventually, right? Eventually one of them was going to start dating, so it might as well be him and now.

Kei stuffed his hands inside his pockets and Shoyou was glad that the temptation to grab it anyway was removed. Kei was so confusing.

He, in fact, was a master at confusing Shoyou. Because that night Shoyou still laid in bed next to him, and Kei obviously did a lot more thinking than he did because instead of saying goodnight Kei rolled half on top of him and whispered, “I bet she doesn’t know we sleep together,” right in his ear before rolling back over and going to sleep.

Shoyou had never felt arousal quite like that before.

* * *

Their new team couldn’t pull themselves together fast enough for the June Inter-High tournament and they lost to Date Tech. The loss of their third years hit harder than they realized and they weren’t a cohesive team yet.

Captain Ennoshita remained positive and said they would take the next tournament.

Shoyou couldn’t help but feel like he greatly contributed to the team’s failure. Ever since he started dating Rei it seemed like him and Kei couldn’t stay in sync on the court. They had stretches where they were good and then they completely fell apart. He was smart enough to realize that whenever Rei stopped by the gym Kei stopped communicating with him.

But next time they’d win for sure.

* * *

Despite the fact Shoyou had been dating Maki for three months now and he and Kei dialed back their physical affection in public, they were still close in private. And part of that meant still reading together. They either stretched out on a bed with Shoyou’s head on Kei’s chest while Kei held the book above them, or they sat up somewhere with Kei’s arm around Shoyou’s shoulder while his long arms held the book in front of them.

It was a few days before Shoyou’s seventeenth birthday and they were sitting on Kei’s bed reading something for class together when Natsu let herself in.

“Sho, there’s a girl at our house looking for you.”

Kei unconsciously tightened his grip on Shoyou’s shoulder.

“Huh?” Shoyou asked as he squirmed to pull his phone out of his pocket and check for any messages, “Why is Rei here?”

Natsu shrugged, “I invited her in here but she said she wanted to see you at our house alone so she could give you a birthday present.”

Shoyou tapped at his phone for a second before putting it back in his pocket, “Okay,” he smiled at Kei, “Don’t read too much without me or I’ll get too far behind. I’ll be back later.”

When Shoyou left Natsu turned to Kei, “Kei-nii,” she asked, “Do you like Sho’s girlfriend?”

Kei tried to hide his face behind the book, “Not really,” he mumbled.

“Why?”

He slumped down, “I don’t know. I just don’t.”

“I don’t like her either,” Natsu crossed her arms, “She treats me like a baby.” Kei was going to respond but before he could Natsu asked, “Do you want to go play volleyball with me?”

Kei shook his head, “I have a lot of homework to do. Maybe later.”

Natsu huffed and left the room to go and play by herself.

An hour later Shoyou returned to the room with wide eyes and clothes in slight disarray. Kei made a face at his disheveled appearance and was going to say that he really did not want to know what he had just gotten up to, and even if he didn’t want to know could Shoyou please go shower or something, but Shoyou spoke before Kei could finish his thought.

“She gave me a handjob,” he blurted out, “I didn’t know she was like that. She said it was a birthday gift? I don’t,” he let out a nervous laugh, “I’ve never done that before.”

Kei scrunched up his nose, “Disgusting.”

Shoyou smiled at him, “You’re just jealous,” he teased.

Kei felt his cheeks grow red. He wasn’t sure who Shoyou was accusing him of being jealous of and he didn’t like that his light teasing had set off all of his defenses. He took a deep breath to try and calm himself again.

But calm was hard to achieve. He was upset. Angry even. Because how could this inconsequential girl keep taking Shoyou from him.

“Shoyou,” he said, darker than he meant to but immediately catching his attention, “Come here.”

Shoyou took a hesitant step forward, “Yeah?”

Kei reached out and wrapped his fingers around the back of his neck just like when he last kissed him and pulled him in slowly, giving Shoyou plenty of time to tell him to stop or get away, but Shoyou’s eyes simply widened and he took a sharp breath like he knew what was coming.

And Kei kissed him again. Only this time he didn’t roll over and pretend it didn’t happen. He broke the kiss and leaned in for another one. And amazingly, Shoyou kissed him back.

Shoyou wrapped his arms around Kei’s shoulders to drag them closer together and deepen the kiss. He was a mediocre kisser and the fact that he didn’t kiss Maki enough to develop any amount of skill or finesse thrilled Kei.

Kei pressed into him a bit harder with the thought that if Shoyou were to get good at this it would be with him. “Mine,” he mumbled against his lips as he kissed him again and again.

Eventually Shoyou broke the kiss with a satisfied sigh and pressed his forehead against Kei’s chest. “Kei,” he whined slightly, “I can’t cheat on my girlfriend.”

“I think,” Kei said slowly as he ran his fingers through Shoyou’s hair, “that you shouldn’t cheat on me.”

“What?” he lifted his head sharply.

Kei’s cheeks reddened, “Everyone always thought we were dating and I think we were and didn’t know.”

Shoyou licked his lips and Kei watched with rapt fascination making Shoyou shiver, “I need time to think, okay?” he asked as he stood on his toes to capture Kei’s mouth in another and another kiss.

He nodded.

* * *

 **Kei:** Shoyou and I made out.  
 **Aki:** Are you finally together then?  
 **Kei:** ...  
 **Aki:** Kei!  
 **Aki:** Why are you doing this to yourself?  
 **Kei:** He has a girlfriend and “needs time to think”.  
 **Aki:** Kei…  
 **Kei:** It’s fine.  
 **Aki:** At least sleep in a different room.  
 **Kei:** I’ll let you know how it goes. We lost at Inter-High  
 **Aki:** Don’t change the subject on me  
 **Aki:** Kei!  
 **Aki:** Kei!!

* * *

＼(＾∀＾)メ(＾∀＾)ノ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I ended up splitting this chapter in half not because of length but because of the sheer amount of things that I wanted to put in it ended up being too much. So next chapter we can see how they navigate this mess lol


	5. Chapter 5

＼(＾∀＾)メ(＾∀＾)ノ

* * *

Kissing Rei was nothing like kissing Kei. Her lips were plumper and softer. She used cherry lip gloss that he liked the taste of and it made kissing her more enticing. The problem with going from kissing his not-exactly-boyfriend to his girlfriend was that they liked different things and he kept getting them mixed up.

Kei liked when Shoyou bit his lips but didn’t care for having another person’s tongue in his mouth. Rei was the opposite, she absolutely didn’t like biting but did like tongue. It was complicated.

Their names rhyming really didn’t help the matter.

Shoyou kept kissing one of them while thinking about the other because he was trying not to confuse their preferences, and he knew that it was wrong but he’d go to school and kiss Rei and go home and kiss Kei. He felt terrible about it. He felt terrible when he was kissing Rei while thinking about what if Kei was wearing lip gloss when they kissed, strawberry flavor of course. He felt terrible when he was kissing Kei while thinking about how soft Rei’s lips were.

He just felt terrible.

Rei didn’t know what was going on and technically he was cheating on her. Well, there was no ‘technically’ about it. He was cheating on her. Kei knew the whole situation but oddly enough wasn’t pushing him to make a decision, instead he kissed Shoyou until he was breathless and looked at him with something in his eyes that Shoyou didn’t understand.

* * *

Like a good boyfriend, he took Rei out on a date when he had the free time, because that’s what you’re supposed to do when you have a girlfriend.

Saturday morning practice ran later than it usually did so he didn’t have time for a few extra tosses with Kageyama after everyone packed up. Instead he headed to the club room with the rest of his team and changed into some less sweaty clothes.

He met up with Kei at the gate and they automatically linked hands. Shoyou tried to ignore how it made his heart beat a bit harder in his chest. He was going home to prepare for his date with Rei, now was not the time to be thinking about his feelings for his best friend. Girlfriend, yes. Best friend, no.

“I have a date today,” Shoyou said, trying to fill the silence.

Kei glanced down at him, “Hmm, that’s nice.”

“I. We’re going to meet in town,” he continued, despite the awkwardness, “I don’t know what to do in town.”

“Get some food, walk around,” Kei offered with a bored expression.

Shoyou looked up at him incredulously, “Are you giving me dating advice?”

Kei grinned predatorily, “Maybe it’s terrible advice.”

He spent the rest of the walk home worrying.

When they got home they went into their separate houses so they could bathe and wash away the remnants of their earlier workout. But while Shoyou stood in his room in his underwear trying to figure out what the best thing to wear on a date was, Kei walked in.

His hair was still a bit wet and Shoyou could tell it was getting longer. His shirt clung to his damp skin. He was unfairly attractive.

If Kei noticed him ogling he didn’t say anything, he simply picked things out of Shoyou’s wardrobe and handed them over.

“Wear these,” he said, sounding as bored as he did before, “they’re probably the best things you own.”

Shoyou put them on without really looking at what Kei handed him then grabbed a fistful of Kei’s shirt to pull him down into a kiss. Kei eagerly kissed him back and for a moment Shoyou could pretend that he wasn’t doing anything wrong.

It just lasted a moment though because Kei pulled back just slightly to ask, “When do you have to go?”

He sighed, “Now.”

He wasn’t sure who closed the gap but they kissed again.

Amazingly he left the house on time and arrived at the meeting spot a few minutes after Rei. He smiled at her when he saw her. She was pretty and he did like her but he felt anxiety in his stomach when he approached. He was definitely doing wrong by her.

She gave him a small peck on the lips after he said hello and for a second he worried that he would taste different. Shoyou didn’t really know if that was possible, because he only tasted cherries while kissing Rei and didn’t taste anything while kissing Kei, but what if that was because he was so used to the cherries? Would Rei notice something different?

She didn’t. One part of him was relieved, he still had time to make his decision, but another part of him wished that she had noticed something so the decision was out of his hands.

Shoyou was distracted for the entirety of their date. His inner turmoil wouldn’t let him relax.

* * *

He was relieved when it was time for them to go to Tokyo for another training camp because then he wouldn’t have time to kiss anyone and maybe he’d have some time to think about what he wanted to do.

He did not count on Kei dragging him away to makeout when they had a moment of free time. But multiple times he found himself sitting in Kei’s lap with his back pressed against a wall in some semblance of trying to be discrete. Kei seemed to take pride in getting him to lightly moan in his mouth. (He occasionally thought about how much he’d like to kiss Kei while he was wearing strawberry lip gloss but it made him feel guilty.)

Kei touched him more during the training camp. In private he ran his hands over Shoyou’s bare sides to make his shiver and in public they resumed their usual closeness and no one questioned if his girlfriend would mind or not, they were simply too used to their actions to care.

When he got home from the camp he had some better teamwork, a somewhat faster quick attack, and a few hidden hickies.

* * *

He broke up with Rei. When he got back from Tokyo she messaged him asking if he wanted to meet up and he agreed.

Before he left he told Kei what he was going to do and Kei gave him a dizzying kiss. It helped bolster his resolve. But then Kei rearranged his shirt so the string of bites he left weren’t visible and again the guilt came crashing in.

He met Rei at the same place they did last time. She tried to kiss him but he turned his face quickly so it landed on his cheek. The benefit of that was he didn’t have to see her confused expression.

She didn’t understand why he was breaking up with her and he didn’t offer much of an explanation.

Next time he kissed Kei, he was mostly guilt free.

* * *

After an entire month of dating, no one noticed a shift in their relationship. It was almost funny. They were finally dating after denying it for so long, and no one realized. Kei thought it would be more amusing if they figured it out on their own and Shoyou agreed, but publicly their relationship wasn’t that much different than it was before.

Sure, they snuck in the occasional kiss on the cheek, and they held hands a little bit more, but in reality their relationship was mostly the same.

The only people who knew about the shift in their relationship was Yamaguchi, who they told and he rolled his eyes and said ‘about time’, Natsu who caught them kissing and then was sworn to secrecy because they didn’t want their mothers to know, and Akiteru, who Kei told and was surprisingly not as supportive as he thought it would be.

After a month they had a bit of a routine.

Shoyou still got up way before Kei but twice a week, instead of the once of week they were doing prior, they compromised on their waking time so they could go to morning practice together. Shoyou delighted in waking Kei up with kisses and was unfazed by the halfhearted and sleepy glare he got in return.

Some mornings got more heated than others but they took care not to push things too far.

Walking to school holding hands and sticking together during practice was hardly new but their touches were more affectionate than they were friendly. People were so accustomed to their prior relationship that they didn’t raise any alarm bells.

They sat a bit closer together while eating lunch but it was barely noticeable and no one commented on it. Before they had gotten together it wasn’t uncommon for Shoyou to spend his lunch period socializing with other groups, but now he mostly stuck with Kei.

Afternoon practice was the same as morning practice. They stretched together, did their drills, worked on what they needed-- together or separately-- until time was up. More often than not Shoyou stayed back for extra practice with Kageyama and Kei would just look at him and say “see you at home, Shoyou,” in that way of his that captured Shoyou’s attention.

When he got back home he usually wanted to kiss his boyfriend but couldn’t. He had to get through doing homework and entertaining Natsu and dinner with their mothers. It was between the time he got home from school and they retired to bed that they did the most pretending. It was tiring and upsetting.

It wasn’t until he started dating Kei did he learn that Kei liked cuddling. He should have known because he was so comfortable with their reading position and they had woken up spooned together plenty of times, but still, it was a pleasant surprise and his favorite way to end his days.

Kei would hold him against his chest for a while until something went off in his brain and he started kissing the back of Shoyou’s neck. Shoyou wasn’t sure what triggered it but he was surprised every night. He let himself enjoy the sensation until he just had to kiss Kei back and he would roll over and capture his lips.

Again and again.

He was happy. His heart felt full.

Sometimes in the middle of the night he’d turn and look at Kei’s sleeping face and wonder: Is this what love feels like?

* * *

It only took a month for everything to fall apart. Kei was sure that this was payback for how their relationship started. If he didn’t make Shoyou cheat on Maki then none of this would have happened.

They were on Kei’s bed trading kisses, homework long forgotten, when Kei’s mother entered the room to let them know that dinner would be ready soon. This is why they had been so careful before, why they had made sure not to do this when anyone was around. Getting caught was surely the beginning of the end.

Her expression blanked when she saw them, “Are you two dating?” she asked with a fake calmness.

The two of them separated and nodded.

She nodded back robotically, “Okay, come with me.”

She turned and left the room without seeing if they were following. Kei and Shoyou shared a quick glance, they didn’t know how this was going to go, and scrambled to follow after her. Kei’s mother led them to the kitchen where she directed them to sit and then she left the house to fetch Shoyou’s mother.

When they returned together they both wore the same neutral expression and sat down on the opposite side of the table from their children.

The silence that stretched was long and uncomfortable as everyone waited for someone to break it. Kei and Shoyou waited for some type of scolding, their mothers waited for some type of confession.

Eventually, Shoyou’s mother cleared her throat, “We should have done this a long time ago,” she started calmly, “but the two of you absolutely cannot share a room anymore.”

“What!” Shoyou yelled.

Kei reached out and put a hand on his arm, pulling him back, “Okay, what else?”

He quickly turned to face Kei, “What do you mean ‘okay’? We--”

“I know,” he cut Shoyou off, “I want to hear everything they have to say. Obviously they’ve been holding back for a long time.”

Their mothers exchanged an unreadable look and Kei’s mother sighed. Apparently she had lost whatever silent argument they were having with each other. She stood up from her chair like she was going to deliver an official announcement. Kei didn’t like it.

“You two are too attached to each other,” she started. Shoyou opened his mouth to argue but she raised a hand to silence him, “Let me finish. We allowed what you were doing when you were young because Natsu was just born and we agreed that Shoyou could use the sleep. We thought that you would grow out of it fairly quickly. And we thought that when you found out it wasn’t normal you would stop. And we thought when you went through puberty it would stop.

“I apologize, to both of you, for not stopping this when you were children. The attachment you have to each other isn’t healthy. So, let me ask you this. Do you two actually have romantic feelings for each other or are you simply so accustomed to having each other by your side that you can’t see it any other way?”

They stared at her, mouths slightly ajar, trying to take in everything she just said.

Kei was the first to recover. He stood and bowed his head awkwardly, “Thank you mother, you’ve given me a lot to think about. Please excuse me.”

And he fled the room.

* * *

Kei knew he was being a coward by running away but he couldn’t sit and listen to them talk for any longer. He knew that their parents would react badly but he had stupidly assumed that the extent of the damage would be separating them, not questioning the foundation of their relationship.

The very worst part was that he understood the question. He wasn’t lying when he said he had a lot to think about.

Did he have romantic feelings for Shoyou or was he overly attached to his best friend? Did he have romantic feelings for Shoyou or was Shoyou literally the person Kei had wet dreams next to and it was some weird hormonal transference? Did he have romantic feelings for Shoyou or was he just afraid of being left behind?

Kei collapsed into his bed, his bed that smelled like Shoyou, and quietly screamed into his pillow.

Things were actually easier when Shoyou was dating Maki.

Shoyou didn’t sneak into his bed that night and Kei wondered if it was because he didn’t want to or because he thought Kei didn’t want him to or because he couldn’t. But Kei didn’t try to get to his room either.

They both had a lot to think about, and he had to do it alone.

* * *

Shoyou laid in his own bed. By himself.

He had asked Natsu if she wanted to spend the night on the futon in his room like she used to but she rolled her eyes at him and said she was too old to have sleepovers with her brother.

Was he supposed to come to the same conclusion with Kei? Because even now he ached to get up and go to Kei’s room and talk to him.

Shoyou was aware that they were unusually close and maybe that started his feelings, but that still meant he had feelings! They weren’t fake and he was upset that they would think that his feelings for Kei weren’t genuine. It was cruel to even suggest such a thing. If he knew Kei, and he did, Kei was probably agonizing over it.

He looked in the direction of Kei’s bedroom. He wanted to go over there. He wanted to tell Kei that he loved him and the fact they had been together since they were five made those feelings bigger and truer, not smaller.

But he knew Kei, and Kei would want to process his feelings alone.

* * *

In the morning Shoyou didn’t go to early morning practice with Kageyama, he waited for Kei in front of their houses hoping they could talk before they met up with Yamaguchi. Kei didn’t seem surprised to see him waiting which filled him with hope. Maybe they would be okay. They knew each other best, after all.

Shoyou tried to take his hand but Kei pulled away.

Shoyou looked at his empty hand, “Why?”

Kei was extremely uncomfortable, “Not here,” he glanced towards their houses and Shoyou followed his gaze. He wasn’t sure if he really understood but he nodded.

When they were out of view from their houses Shoyou went for his hand again and Kei let him take it, but he barely held it back. Shoyou didn’t let that stop him, he determinedly held Kei’s limp hand.

A block before where they usually met up with Yamaguchi, Shoyou stopped them, “I like you,” he said, a touch too loud, “I don’t care what they said. I like you.”

Kei wouldn’t meet his gaze, “I need time to think.”

Shoyou felt like he was punched in the stomach.

He wondered if Kei felt like this when Shoyou said he had to choose between him and Rei.

* * *

By the time they reached Yamaguchi the tension in the air hadn’t subsided. They were still holding each other’s hands but it was with an odd tension rather than their usual familiarity. Yamaguchi looked at them oddly when they approached. Kei nodded at him as if to say everything was fine, but Yamaguchi wasn’t convinced.

It took only one block of stilted conversation for Yamaguchi to ask, “What’s going on? You two are acting weird.” He crossed his arms and waited for an answer.

Shoyou chuckled nervously, “Ah, Kei and I are dating?”

Yamaguchi tilted his head. He had always figured that when they started dating it would either be more of the same or they would be even more disgustingly affectionate with each other. This awkwardness didn’t make sense.

“So why are you acting weird?” he asked again, “You two have been practically dating for years.”

Kei tensed, “And therein lies the problem, doesn’t it,” he said cryptically.

Shoyou’s shoulders slumped as he sighed. Yamaguchi couldn’t make heads or tails of Kei’s remark but guessed that he wasn’t going to get anything more out of the two of them.

They couldn’t pull themselves together and act as they normally did in front of the team. The first big clue that something was wrong came when Kei shrugged off Shoyou’s assistance with stretching, something he hadn’t done in the almost two years they had been on the team together.

Their teammates watched as Shoyou’s expression fell and he stretched by himself.

It was obvious that they were out of sync again. Kei hated that everyone could tell how their friendship or relationship was going by how well they could read each other on the court, it was almost unfair. The only upside was no one would approach him and ask if everything was okay, they would only ask Shoyou.

Kei failed to block Shoyou’s spikes and Shoyou failed to receive balls that Kei lined up for him. They were a mess and everyone noticed.

* * *

Kei hid in the bathroom when he got home. It was the only place where he could be truly certain that no one would bother him.

He needed to figure out his feelings for Shoyou. Shoyou seemed so certain that their feelings were genuine but he didn’t know how Kei had manipulated him. How Kei had been kissing him on the forehead before Shoyou realized his romantic feelings, how Kei kissed him while he was asleep, how Kei knew he had a crush and kept Shoyou close.

Maybe Kei’s feelings were real, but they were twisted. And he definitely twisted Shoyou’s feelings to suit what he wanted.

He was definitely a terrible person. There was no way to spin it that didn’t cast him in a bad light. There was no way that they could have a healthy relationship.

He was going to have to break up with Shoyou.

The realization punched him in the stomach. He sat on the bathroom floor with his head between his knees and tried to wait for the feeling to pass but after a few minutes he knew that the feeling wasn’t going to. He was just going to have to live like this for the rest of his life. And he deserved to for what he did to Shoyou, and for what he was about to do.

Kei waited for when he knew Shoyou would be home and slowly walked to his bedroom. He felt like he was walking to his death. There was no telling how Shoyou would react, he couldn’t even come up with a best case scenario, every case seemed terrible.

Shoyou smiled at him when Kei entered the room. He raised the piece of paper he was working on, “Help me with this,” he said with a note of frustration.

Kei nodded and sat next to him, there was no reason he couldn’t help him with his homework. Shoyou scooted closer so their sides were pressed together and Kei could practically feel tension leave his small body. Shoyou thought he was here for reconciliation.

They worked through the English homework together, at one point Kei considered leaving to get his schoolwork but he knew that if he left he wouldn’t have the courage to come back so he resigned himself to doing the work twice. By the end of it he wished he did leave and didn’t return because Shoyou looked up at him with big thankful eyes and kissed him.

Kei knew that he should push Shoyou away but the terrible part of him that lived deep in his brain said ‘one last kiss can’t hurt’ and he pulled Shoyou into his lap and kissed him deeply. Shoyou gasped as he was manhandled into a new position but adjusted quickly.

Shoyou was becoming a much better kisser and it gave Kei a small thrill to know that it was his doing. Kissing Shoyou was intoxicating.

Kissing Shoyou was something that he shouldn’t be doing.

Kei broke the kiss and Shoyou trailed after his lips trying to start again. Kei closed his eyes because he had no right to be that attracted and managed to bite out, “We should break up.”

He felt Shoyou stiffen in his lap, “What?”

“I. You.” Kei started and stopped a few times, “We should break up.”

“What?” he said again, anger creeping into his voice.

“You don’t like me, Sho,” Kei said, running his hands up and down Shoyou’s sides like he was trying to soothe him.

Shoyou’s eyes narrowed, “You don’t get to decide that!” he yelled and pushed Kei’s shoulder harshly. He wasn’t expecting to be shoved and easily toppled to the floor, “I love you, you idiot!”

Kei looked up at Shoyou without bothering to get up, “No you don’t,” he said blankly, “Shoyou, when was our first kiss?”

“It was--” he started.

“Wrong,” Kei interrupted before he could give an answer, “I kissed you while you were sick and unconscious at Nationals. Akiteru has known that I’ve had a crush on you forever. I manipulated your feelings. You don’t like me.”

Shoyou squinted at him like he didn’t understand, “You don’t get to tell me how I feel, Kei,” he moved out of Kei’s lap so he could sit up easier, “I don’t care about all of that. I love you.”

“No you don’t!” Kei shot up into a sitting position, “Even if you don’t care about it, I do. We’re breaking up. Good bye, Shoyou.”

And for the second time, he ran away from a conversation.

* * *

Kei and Shoyou went through an entire morning practice without speaking to each other and the tension in the gym was at an all-time high.

By the time they were in the club room changing for class, Noya had had enough of their moping and weird energy, “Okay,” he yelled, “What’s going on with you two?” He pointed at Kei and Shoyou.

Shoyou glanced at Kei for the first time that morning and felt a familiar pain in his chest, “Kei broke up with me,” he admitted quietly. He felt like the words were going to choke him.

Kei finished dressing and left the room.

The others looked shocked, “Wait, wait, wait,” Tanaka said loudly while flailing his arms, “I thought you two weren’t dating.”

Shoyou shrugged, “We started about a month ago and then he broke up with me last night,” he rubbed at his cheek with the palm of his hand even though no tears had fallen, “I don’t want to talk about it.”

Shoyou left the room quickly, intent on getting to class without shedding any tears.

Tanaka looked around at their remaining teammates, “What the fuck.”

* * *

Kei had never been known as a cheerful person. He was, at best, apathetic. But after breaking up with Shoyou he was downright mean.

Kei’s attitude had never really impacted the team in a negative way before. He had riled up Tanaka and Nishinoya but they fed off of that energy, and Kei was never malicious with them. Even with Kageyama, who Kei got along with the least on the team, never had a truly terrible encounter with Kei.

The few days following the breakup he tried to act normal, or as normally as he could while also ignoring his best friend-turned-ex-boyfriend. He tried to go through the motions of practice and school and more practice and homework.

But people wouldn’t let him be.

For once they weren’t just pestering Shoyou about their relationship, they were questioning Kei too. Shoyou was a saint for putting up with their teammates, Kei did not have the patience.

So he snapped at them.

During afternoon practice Kei was trying to project the strongest leave-me-alone aura that he possibly could, but Noya was immune to its effects.

“You really messed up, huh,” Noya said loudly, but he was incapable of doing anything quietly, “Shoyou’s been down, you’ve been angry. Why don’t you just apologize and move on?”

Kei squeezed the volleyball in his hands, took a deep breath, and dropped the ball, “You know what,” he said to no one in particular, “fuck this.”

And he walked out.

Of course people couldn’t just let him walk out. His teammates tried to follow him out the door but Ennoshita corralled them back in at an impressive rate. He did, unfortunately, get to Kei before he could leave school grounds.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Ennoshita crossed his arms, stance wide, like he was physically standing his ground.

Kei looked him straight in the eye, “Home.”

They stared at each other for a moment before Ennoshita nodded, “Come talk to me tomorrow.”

“Oh-Okay?” Kei stuttered, he didn’t think it would be that easy. He wondered what Ennoshita saw in his eyes that made him give up so quickly and let him continue with his retreat. Whatever it was, it took the wind out of his sails and he felt exhausted, like he had participated in practice anyway.

Yamaguchi was the first person to corner Kei and try to talk though.

Maybe corner wasn’t exactly the right word. He simply waited for Kei at the usual spot and as soon as they fell into step with each other his friend turned to him and said, “You’ve been kind of an asshole lately, huh?”

Kei turned and glared at Yamaguchi who put his hands up as if he was surrendering, but he kept talking anyway.

“We have Inter-High coming up soon, it’s our last chance to qualify for Nationals this year. If you two don’t pull yourselves together we’re not going to make it. I’m not saying get back together but…” Yamaguchi looked back towards where they had come from, “Are you even talking?”

Kei clicked his tongue, “Ennoshita wants to talk to me later. He’ll probably lecture me about Nationals and teamwork,” he fiddled with the strap of his bag, “Talking to him is just going to hurt him more.”

Yamaguchi hummed lightly, “Him or you?”

“Shut up, Yamaguchi,” he said with no heat, sounding mostly defeated.

“Sorry, Tsukki,” he patted Kei on the back.

Kei wondered what he was apologizing for.

Ennoshita cornered him while he was changing for morning practice, and this time cornered was definitely the correct word to use. Ennoshita stood too close with his arms crossed and somehow looked down on him even though Kei was the taller of the two.

“Can I at least put my shirt on before you lecture me?”

Because he was a benevolent captain he allowed Kei to dress and shooed everyone out of the club room. When everyone was out of the room his face softened and gone was the fierce captain who masterfully reigned in all of Karasuno’s wild forces and instead stood the soft-spoken person Kei thought he was the year before.

“Tell me about Hinata,” he asked.

Kei didn’t know how to react. He had expected to be yelled at and for Ennoshita to demand he never walk out like that again. “Huh?”

“Hinata,” he prodded, “What do you like about him?”

“I don’t have to tell you that,” he said, voice catching in his throat.

Ennoshita nodded, “You don’t. I already had this conversation with him about you though. Right now, I am going to be selfish and ask you to stop seeing him as your ex-boyfriend. Just see the best in him so we can focus on getting to Nationals. I can tell the rest of the team to leave you alone.”

Kei nodded because he didn’t trust his voice.

* * *

**Shoyou** : Aki  
 **Shoyou** : Have you talked to Kei?

**Akiteru** : Yeah. You two got together and broke up faster than I expected.  
 **Akiteru** : Well, it took you longer than I thought for you to get together  
 **Akiteru** : And I didn’t expect you to ever break up

**Shoyou** : WE didn’t break up. HE broke up with ME

**Akiteru** : He explained it to me, I told him he was an idiot, he hung up on me  
 **Akiteru** : But he did call.

**Shoyou** : How do I win Kei back?

**Akiteru** : How do you get Kei to get over his own insecurities?  
 **Akiteru** : Be persistent?

**Shoyou** : I can do that.

* * *

＼(＾∀＾)メ(＾∀＾)ノ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> katy perry's Hot n Cold plays in the distance


	6. Chapter 6

＼(＾∀＾)メ(＾∀＾)ノ

* * *

Avoiding your best friend turned ex-boyfriend was difficult when he lived next door, was on the same sport’s team, was in your class, and shared friends. It was even more difficult when said ex-boyfriend seemed to had missed the ‘I’m avoiding you’ memo and was going out of his way to try and interact.

Not that he had to go far out of his way.

During practice they didn’t stretch together but Shoyou spent all of practice calling out “nice block, Kei,” and “Kei, nice serve” and let out complement after complement. It was a bit awkward to constantly be praised and his heart squeezed uncomfortably in his chest every time.

After practice Shoyou would offer him a protein bar and Kei cursed his reflex to reach out and take whatever Shoyou was handing him. He usually ate it because he was hungry from skipping breakfast and it definitely had nothing to do with how Shoyou smiled at him. Kei wasn’t as strong as he was pretending to be.

During class he could feel Shoyou watching him. When he glanced over Shoyou didn’t even bother averting his gaze, he’d just make eye contact until Kei looked away. Kei felt like he was being studied, which was stupid because if anyone knew everything about him already it would be Shoyou. There was nothing to gain from watching him pretend to listen to their teacher.

One of the worst parts of being broken up was that they still instinctively reached for each other. Kei could deal with how they gravitated towards each other when Ennoshita or Coach Ukai called for a team huddle, because when they realized they were getting too close they could always back off. But he couldn’t deal with the amount of times he tried to reach for his hand, or the amount of times he’d seen Shoyou do the same.

After practice he usually got to walk home by himself but at home if Shoyou caught him spending time with Natsu he would join in as well-- and Kei didn’t think there was any reason to punish Natsu and not spend time with her just because he didn’t want to see her brother, he wasn’t that cruel.

Kei found solace in his bedroom because it was the only place Shoyou wouldn’t follow him. He was relieved that Shoyou at least had that boundary.

But Shoyou wouldn’t be Shoyou if he didn’t take things at least a little bit over the top. So every few days Natsu would knock on his bedroom door and deliver him a slice of strawberry shortcake courtesy of her brother and roll her eyes at how dumb they were being, but she was twelve and he let her attitude go.

He ate the cake, of course.

And then one morning he opened his door and hanging on the door handle was a bag with the next book in the series he was reading.

And then in his shoe locker was a roll of sports tape just when he was running low.

And then there was the small dinosaur key chain on his desk.

Yamaguchi laughed when Kei told him about it, “I think he’s courting you,” he said, amused.

It sort of made sense to Kei, they had skipped most of the blushing and flirting stages of getting together so maybe this was Shoyou’s way of taking a few steps back while also trying to take steps forward.

Kei scoffed, “It’s annoying.”

* * *

Kei let himself into Shoyou’s room without knocking or announcing himself and Shoyou practically fell out of his bed trying to sit up fast enough.

“Stop it,” Kei said, crossing his arms.

Shoyou huffed quietly, “Stop what?” He watched Kei with wide and curious eyes even though he wasn’t moving, “What’s going on?”

Kei didn’t like his innocent act. It was obviously him who was leaving him gifts everywhere, “Stop giving me gifts.”

“Someone is giving you gifts?” he tilted his head, “They must really like you then.”

He groaned, “Is that what this is about? You’re upset that I said you don’t like me.”

Shoyou flopped back down on his bed and scratched his stomach absentmindedly, “Hmm, maybe,” he said casually.

Kei had forgotten how exhausting Shoyou could be sometimes, “What do I need to do to make you stop?”

He sat up quickly with a large grin across his face, “Go on a date with me. Just one date. Let me prove that I do like you and that it has nothing to do with what you think you did. Please, Kei. What could it hurt?”

He didn’t want to say that it would hurt him to go on a date and then have to separate again, but Shoyou was looking at him with pleading eyes, it was hard to resist. Kei sighed, “Fine, one date. But I’m not promising anything will come from it.”

“No problem,” Shoyou pounded his chest with his fist, “By the end of it you’ll definitely want to date me again.”

Kei walked away without responding. It wasn’t about his desire to date him, he already wanted that. It was about everything that came along with it.

* * *

**Shoyou** : I got Kei to go on a date with me!

**Akiteru** : Alright!  
 **Akiteru** : What are you gonna do?

**Shoyou** : IDK!!

* * *

Kei felt stupid waiting outside his house for Shoyou so they could go on a date. He considered going back inside and feigning sickness but then Shoyou would want to take care of him or reschedule or worse, both. So he waited outside their houses with his hands shoved in his pockets.

He should have asked what they were doing so he could have mentally prepared.

Shoyou ran out of his house a few minutes later looking frazzled, “I’m sorry!” he called out, “I know I’m late, I’m sorry.”

“Whatever,” Kei turned away from him, “Where are we going?”

“Into town,” Shoyou said vaguely as he took his usual spot at Kei’s side, “I. Um. Can I hold your hand?” he asked nervously.

Kei felt his cheeks warm as he clenched his hands into fists in his pockets. He wanted to hold Shoyou’s hand, the risk was that once he did he knew that he wasn’t going to want to let go. Maybe that’s what Shoyou was counting on. But Shoyou was looking up at him so earnestly that he almost didn’t have the heart to suspect any ulterior motives.

He nodded and Shoyou’s entire face lit up.

He had to look away.

It hadn’t been that long since they last held hands, a few weeks at most, but Kei had to hold back a sigh at how well the two of them fit together. He wasn’t going to think anything cheesy like they were made for each other, but it always felt right to have Shoyou by his side.

Shoyou led them to a local ice cream shop and told Kei to wait outside while he ordered for him because he knew exactly what he wanted.

Kei leaned against the wall and waited. Was he being stupid by agreeing to go on this date? He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn’t notice Shoyou come back until something cold was shoved in his hands.

“It’s coffee flavored,” he said happily.

He looked down at the cup full of ice cream, “Not strawberry?”

He shook his head, “I know you like strawberry but you also like coffee! You like that it’s bitter. And you don’t like cones because they can get soggy and you think that’s gross.”

Kei brought the cup to his face and took a bite so he could hide his expression, “Thank you.”

Shoyou beamed at him, “This was only part one of our I-know-you tour. Let’s keep going.”

It was only then that Kei noticed that Shoyou hadn’t bought himself any ice cream. He was going to comment on it but Shoyou slipped his hand into the crook of his elbow and lightly tugged him along. They didn’t usually walk like this, but it was nice. He let Shoyou lead him without complaining.

The next stop was the music store a few blocks away. Kei wanted to go towards a specific section but Shoyou led him towards a different one. He weaved through a few aisles before stopping in front of a genre Kei didn’t really listen to.

Shoyou dropped his arm and leafed through a few CDs, “Here,” he held one out to Kei, “You pretend not to like them but I see you nodding your head when they’re on the radio.”

He held the CD carefully in his hands like it would break or disappear at any second then glanced back up at Shoyou, “You noticed that?”

“I notice a lot about you. Let me buy this and we can keep going,” he took the CD from Kei’s hand and went to pay before Kei could tell him not too.

“Where to next?” He asked after Shoyou handed him the bag with the CD.

Shoyou offered his hand and Kei took it without thinking.

This date was becoming dangerous. Of course Kei was aware that Shoyou knew a lot about him, it came with the territory of being best friends for over ten years, but he wasn’t prepared for the level of consideration that came along with it. He had always thought that Shoyou was a bit oblivious, so he didn’t know how to feel over silly things like besides his obvious sweet tooth he also liked bitter flavors, or that he had bands that he wouldn’t admit he liked.

Things like that went beyond ‘I made you like me’, things like that meant that he noticed Kei. Being noticed was terrifying.

While Kei was lost in thought Shoyou brought him to the bookstore a few shops down. The cashier waved at them and Shoyou told him that he bought the book he gave him the other day from here and they spent some time chatting.

Shoyou directed them right to the science fiction novels and grinned, “Want to see something impressive, I think I can almost do it.”

Kei nodded, he had no idea where this was going.

Then he started pointing out which series Kei had read, because, as he pointed out, he preferred series to standalone novels. Some were books that he owned and would have seen on Kei’s shelves everyday, but even more were books he had taken out of the library and returned in a matter of days.

“How do you remember this?” Kei asked, trying to hide how shaken up he really was.

Shoyou smiled up at him, “I’ve been trying to tell you, I remember everything about you.”

In the science fiction aisle of their local bookstore, Kei leaned down and kissed him.

* * *

“So does this mean we’re dating again?” Shoyou asked the next day.

Kei stared at his mouth, still slightly red from the amount of kissing they did yesterday, and bent down to steal another kiss, “Yes.”

He sighed happily, “We should still talk about things. With each other and our parents.”

“Yeah,” Kei frowned.

They sat cross legged in Kei’s backyard with their knees pressed together and tried not to smile at each other like idiots. Or, Kei tried not to smile like an idiot, Shoyou grinned widely at him like he was getting everything he wanted and they weren’t about to have a potentially difficult conversation.

Kei didn’t want to have this conversation and it must have shown on his face because Shoyou reached out and took his hands. There were so many points of contact between them that after so long of not touching, it was comforting. Shoyou offered him a reassuring smile and Kei squeezed his hands in return.

Kei took a deep breath and told Shoyou about the conversation he had with Akiteru about puberty when they were younger. Shoyou made a confused face because it was an unexpected starting point but Kei kept going, letting his eyes unfocus and look past Shoyou instead of at him. He brought up how they experienced the beginnings of puberty in extremely close proximity and, as much as he wanted to admit it, they probably shouldn’t have shared a bed for as long as they did.

Shoyou tried to complain but Kei squeezed his hands again. He told Shoyou that having him so close while he had feelings for him and he couldn’t control his body’s reactions was confusing and unfair and he did lots of things he shouldn’t have done.

He burned holes into their joined hands with his eyes as he admitted that he took advantage of him.

But Shoyou was adamant that he didn’t. That, sure, Kei started kissing him for not great reasons but he could have stopped him at any time and didn’t. Shoyou could have left or overpowered him but didn’t because he liked him, even if he didn’t understand it at the time.

Shoyou did say that Kei shouldn’t have kissed him at Nationals the year before though, but only because he didn’t give him a chance to reciprocate.

Kei hesitated but said that they should continue sleeping in their own rooms, if only to appease their mothers and make it easier when they inevitably have to in the future. Shoyou didn’t like the implications but he agreed.

The conversation was long and emotionally draining but they came out of it happy about the results.

Later, when they approached their mothers again, they were a united front. They knew their feelings were genuine, they knew that there were risks, but they were willing to face them together.

* * *

The volleyball club was rather vocal with their approval of their relationship, mostly because Kei and Shoyou knew how to act like teammates again and could coordinate with each other on the court. If dating meant they worked well together then the team was all for it, especially because it was time for Inter-High again.

It was their last chance of the year to qualify for Nationals and they were nervous. They had a good team but they weren’t always consistent. They were constantly in flux be it because of injury or teamwork issues or relationship drama.

Both Shoyou and Kei felt guilty. They weren’t as prepared as they were last year. But this year they had something that they didn’t have the year prior-- experience.

It could be difficult to put a value on experience but the time you didn’t have to spend psyching yourself up or calming yourself down was valuable. The knowledge of how things worked and how the tournament flowed made it easier to go through, it was one less thing to be anxious about.

Every school in the tournament knew who Karasuno was now. They were the school who, just a year prior, beat our Shiratorizawa and made it a considerable way through Nationals. People wanted to best them.

It was terrifying.

It was exhilarating.

It didn’t matter, because at the last whistle the ball hit the court on the other side of the net and Karasuno was going to Nationals yet again.

When the news sunk in, the rest of the team stormed the court to celebrate. Shoyou jumped on Kei and kissed him in the middle of the court, not caring who saw.

* * *

Shoyou was trying to get Kei to eat at least a little bit more of his lunch when Kei lightly kicked his foot and nodded his head towards the doorway.

At first Shoyou thought it was a prank and that Kei was going to dump his food somewhere but he noticed that Kei kept glancing towards the door, almost like he was uncomfortable, so Shoyou turned around.

Rei was hovering at the entrance of their classroom, trying her hardest not to disturb anyone, and Shoyou understood why Kei was uncomfortable.

“I’m going to go talk to her,” Shoyou said, standing up before anyone could tell him that it was a bad idea.

Rei looked alarmed when Shoyou started approaching her but she didn’t flee, just watched with cautious eyes, “Hello, Shoyou,” she said quietly before correcting herself, “Hinata. May we speak?”

“Shoyou is still fine,” he rubbed the back of his head, “Do you want to talk outside?”

It was November so the weather was getting colder but it would be away from prying eyes and ears. Rei nodded and walked out of the room without seeing if Shoyou was following her. She was easy to catch up to though and Shoyou matched her pace as they stepped outside.

There were a few people mulling around, having their lunch outside, but they were easy to avoid. Rei didn’t say anything until they found a spot at least a few steps away from the nearest person. She didn’t want to be overheard.

“Did you cheat on me with Tsukishima or just get together right away?” she asked without any preamble. She didn’t even look hurt. She looked blank.

Shoyou was familiar with that blank look though, Kei was a master at hiding his emotions, so he could guess that she was more hurt than she was allowing herself to show. He practically threw himself into a low bow, “I’m sorry.”

She frowned at him but he couldn’t see it from his position, “You cheated on me?”

He nodded.

“Why? Why not just break up with me first?” she asked, hints of anger and disappointment finally showing.

He stood up and looked her in the eye with the most open and honest face he could make, “I was very confused. I didn’t know dating him was possible until I started dating you. Not because he’s a boy or anything, Kei’s been my best friend for as long as I could remember. I didn’t know there could be more.”

She broke eye contact and looked away, “And then what happened?”

“He kissed me and I was confused,” he let out a small yell of frustration and ruffled his hair, “He’s such a jerk but I’ve always wanted to be with him and I was always with him and then we kissed and I wanted to kiss him but I was also dating you. I’m so sorry. I knew what I was doing was wrong.”

“You love him,” she said. It wasn’t a question.

He nodded, “I thought I loved him as my best friend, but I just love him,” his cheeks burned with the admission. He hadn’t said it to Kei since the breakup and there was something weird about admitting it to your ex-girlfriend who you cheated on.

“Okay,” she said. A small amount of tension left her shoulders, “How do you think you’re going to do at Nationals?”

Shoyou grinned, “I hope we win it all!”

* * *

Shoyou knocked on Kei’s door and waited for the soft “come in” from the other side before entering. They were trying to be more mindful of each other’s spaces and recognize that even if they grew up on top of each other that didn’t mean they always had to be.

They still enjoyed a high level of physical affection, but now they did things like ask to come over and knock on doors and spend five or six out of seven nights in their own rooms like normal, well-adjusted teenagers.

“Hey,” Kei said as Shoyou entered. He had a book closed on his stomach and his eyes looked tired. Shoyou wondered how long he had been reading. Kei checked his phone, “What are you doing here?”

Shoyou held up a small bag, “I have a gift for you?”

Kei squinted at him, “Is that a question?”

“Maybe,” he laughed nervously, “I don’t know if you’ll like it. You’ll probably think it’s stupid. I’m just going to go. Yeah.”

“No,” Kei stopped him, “That’s my gift. Give it to me.”

Shoyou held back a smile, sometimes he forgot that Kei had an immature side. He handed Kei the small bag and watched nervously as he opened it and seriously considered running out of the room when he saw Kei frowning at the contents.

He took out a small tube of strawberry lip gloss, “Did you buy this for Maki?”

“No!” he clasped Kei’s hands and seriously looked into his eyes, “No, I want to kiss you while you wear it.”

Kei bit his lower lip but couldn’t hold back his laugh, “You bought me a gift because you have a weird lip gloss kink,” he covered his mouth and tried to contain himself but his shaking shoulders gave away how funny he really thought the situation was.

“Don’t say it like that,” Shoyou whined, “I can just take it back if you’re going to laugh at me.”

Kei pushed Shoyou away with his foot when he tried to get closer and grab it, “No, it’s mine now,” he unwrapped the tube from its plastic casing and unscrewed the top. Shoyou watched in complete fascination as Kei brought the tube to his nose to smell the contents. His nose scrunched up, “A bit artificial but I guess it’ll do.”

He lightly coated his lips with the strawberry gloss, “Is this what you wanted?”

Shoyou nodded at him, eyes glued to Kei’s lips and unable to form words of his own.

“If you’re just going to stare at me I’ll go back to reading,” Kei reached for his book again but Shoyou tackled him.

Shoyou groaned practically the second their lips touched and he ignored the fact he could hear Kei chuckling beneath him. Kei’s lips were soft and wet and slid so nicely against his own. He slipped a hand beneath Kei’s neck to tilt his head back just a bit so he could better get at his mouth.

He lightly ran his tongue across Kei’s bottom lip and savored the artificial strawberry flavor almost as much as he savored the sound Kei always made when he did that.

They parted for a second and Shoyou took a deep breath to clear his head. He wasn’t trying to start anything more than this. He just wanted to kiss Kei while he tasted like strawberries, even if the thought of it made his whole body feel too hot.

The next kiss was softer and slower as he calmed himself down. His eyes fluttered closed and Kei sighed contently into the kiss, ready to slowly make out until it was impossible to tell who had initially put on the lip gloss or if it was wiped away completely.

* * *

“Good gift?” Shoyou would ask later while they still stole the occasional kiss from each other.

“No,” Kei would say, hiding a smile with another kiss, “Next time you buy me a gift, make sure it’s for me and not for you.”

* * *

Kei didn’t like Tokyo. It was too big, too loud, smelled weird, and was full of expectations.

Kei hated expectations.

There was so much he was expected to do. Be at the top of his class, be the pillar of Karasuno’s blocking game, be an attentive senpai, be a good son, be a decent brother, be a good boyfriend. Expectations and frustrations piled up around him, growing bigger and bigger year after year.

Shoyou gave Kei a curious look after he let out an annoyed grunt and took his hand.

Kei looked down at their hands and felt his shoulders sag.

They were five the first time they held hands. And now, at seventeen, with their hands still clasped, the future didn’t look too bad.

* * *

＼(＾∀＾)メ(＾∀＾)ノ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's over! I feel a bit bad(?) about this fic, the entire thing isn't really to my liking... it started as something really, really self indulgent and then I wasn't sure what to do with it and then I wanted to move on to other things but wanted to finish this first. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed it though! Even if I floundered around a bit, who doesn't enjoy a childhood friends AU lol
> 
> /rambles
> 
> Feel free to come talk to me at rurambles on tumblr


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